Am I mad for considering this living situation? Setting up house with parents AND brother

The house situation to one side...There's many a Londoner who has regretted a
move to the country.

How well do you know the area ?
What's the weather like in winter ? If you're high up, what's the snowfall like and does the house get cut off ?
Nearest neighbour is how far away ?
Will this be the first time living away from London ?
What's the public transport system like, inc taxis ?
What the local health care like ? Nearest hospital ? Nearest private hospital ?
How good is the broad band ? really important if you're planning to work from home
What are the local plans for more house building ?
If you may have kids - what's the child care like, schools, sports set up. And accept you will be the chauffeur for ever, or at least until they are 17/18

Parents would not dream of relying on their children. They are very independent

Please be extremely careful, OP; "financially comfortable" or not I've heard this said so often - until age related illness kick in and they start to feel that having strangers to do the care isn't acceptable

I totally get the appeal, but with so many potential issues which could wreck it I'd go for something of your own

Every airline always has to have pilots on standby distance, FOs and Captains.

If the legals are worked through carefully (you should all take specialist advice and I suggest a different solicitor for you two to your parents) then why not consider it?

Sounds good, IF you think through all the future proofing .

Is the commute into London possible on day a week?
Schools should you decided to have Dc: nearby and preferably walkable at primary makes a massive difference
In a village / with a shop in walking distance? Isolated rural can be tricky and car reliant.
Could the properties be split into separate titles if necessary? Would the access and layout be suitable?
In the hopefully very distant future, is your parents’ total estate likely to top £1m and if so will there be enough cash in the estate to cover IHT or can you and your DBro afford the IHT? Because otherwise you could well have to move if the houses cannot be split into separate titles and sold

Don’t get carried away by the apparent idyll , I have a nook under the blossom just like that in my commonly reviled area of S London.

Well Ms Risk Averse, you do you.

I'm merely saying that I think the OP should go for it and I'm sure she will find some way deal with it if it doesn't work out.

You are assuming that the cottage can be sold separately. Often they can't. OP seems to not have considered this. OP is thinking about investing hundreds of thousands of pounds in an asset she might not be able to sell. It seems very naive to me.

Whilst I can see why the idea is tempting, seek legal advice, as this could become financially complicated. I can see this situation with a lot of variables in the coming years, and might not be the dream you hoped it would be OP. Tread carefully.

And you can say anything might be a risk and live in a cramped new build with a tiny garden and wonder what if?

Or you can go for it. We regret the things we don't do, not the things we do.

Looks like a great place to live, brother won't be there much, parents are great and independent and will manage their own care. They all go on holiday together so they work well. Lots of families who get on do this.

I think this is crucial.

Both you and your brother are clearly still young (you said he is 26 and you said no dc on the horizon yet, but you might later), so I think all parties need to consider the "What ifs....." as there are many. It would seem unlikely that none of you, your dh, your db, and his potential future partner won't ever want something different. That's not to say it wouldn't work, but it is really important to work out what happens when that crops up.

I was also wondering if a long haul pilot would want to travel that far home (from presumably Heathrow or Gatwick) at the end of a shift.

Personally, I wouldn't want to travel in to London for a working day every week either - I think that would soon get old.

If you've all talked through all of these though it does sound lovely.

But if they rent out the cottage OPs money will be tied up in the property. The parents would need to to have enough cash to buy out OP, which they may not have.

Sounds perfect, go for it. But do be aware of full and proper conversations about money and how to secure your portion of it that you’ve put in.

the property of 3 may not be allowed to be divided - this would be necessary on death?

I would do it with my kids in a heartbeat but wouldn't with my mum because she's nuts - I like to keep her at arms length - that bring said if you are able to afford it and all get on well enough go for it.

It sounds lovely! Good luck to you if you go for it 🙂

It sounds great, but people have brought up all sorts of scenarios here. Have a plan for them all that everyone is happy with. If you can do that, then go for it!

Then the parents could sell the cottage to someone else or rent it out.

Nothing ventured, nothing gained. They'll work it out.
Besides it sounds as though they get on really well.

That's the whole point - they can't just move away!

What if OP wanted to sell up and the parents' didn't. They are stuck there.

Focus on the legal and financial practicalities.

Is there any way that you can separate the 3 properties into 3 separate parcels of land ie your parents originally own 100% but then sell off house and land to you and your brother.

That way you would all be on the same estate but would independently own your own homes and could sell up if you wanted to without everyone else having to sell up as well. You would each be responsible for the cost of repairs and maintenance of your own land and the shared driveway would need to have right of way drawn up, including who pays for maintenance.

If it's not possible to separate the estate then, no, I don't think it's a good idea to tie yourselves financially like this.

Sounds amazing! And just think how easy it will be to support your parents when they eventually need it.

Of course it sounds dreamy, the sun has been shining for a couple of weeks now!

Seriously, how on earth would you cope with one day a week in London? You can't surely think you could go up and back in a day from Devon?
My DD might have had to change her job and commute to London one day a week from a much easier train route than Devon, hers was a direct route but 1hr40. With the journey to the station and at the other end it would easily be more than 3 hours commuting. She was SO relieved that in the end she didn't have to do it. Devon will be longer. How far are you away from a station, do you have to change trains?

You say you could possibly get away with one day a week in London. Many companies have increased their hours in the office to 2 or 3 days a week, what if that happens?

Sorry, I don't want to put a dampener on it, but it's about being realistic.

I'd do it, but as others have said, set things up so each property can be sold separately if one party needs to move.

Very naive. If parents need care their properties will be sold to pay for the care.

You seem determined for it to happen. So why ask for opinions?

Now you've posted the picture I'm jealous! What a lovely spot to relax in. It sounds like if your parents are helping both you and your brother to buy they are planning inheritance very well as if they gift you money now and they live another 7 years it won't be counted for inheritance tax. Make sure the 2 cottages are in yours and your brother's name. It truly sounds idyllic and ideal if you only have to go to London once a week. I wouldn't turn this wonderful opportunity down. You have wonderful parents, but I expect you know that already.