Was my new boyfriend disrespectful or misplaced humour - incident during sex

Amz98 · 2025-04-12T09:32:20+00:00

A bit grossed out by something my BF of about 4 months did last night. We have a really jokey relationship but I think he crossed the line. We were being intimate and he let out a really exaggerated fart then burst out laughing. He obviously meant to do it and thought I’d find it funny. I stopped what we were doing as the mood was gone and it stunk. He said sorry after but I feel like even with a jokey relationship, that’s going too far?

namechangeGOT · 16/04/2025 21:11

Amz98 · 13/04/2025 20:36

I’ve told him over the phone that we’re done, he didn’t take it very well, said I’m ‘fridgid’ and need to be more adventurous if I want to keep a man 😂

Annoying it’s not worked out but at least it’s still relatively early and plenty more fish in the sea!

Well, I am what some would term ‘adventurous’. Often on MN I see the kind of sexual acts that me and my husband enjoy being described as gross, which is fine, each to their own. But someone would fart on me intentionally once and once alone and they’d be out! Well done!

Ilovegermany · 16/04/2025 19:46

Apologies that he treated you this way. As I said if it happened with us it would be different but different stage in relationship as well.

Fannybycandlelight · 14/04/2025 01:43

Amz98 · 12/04/2025 16:17

He has apologised again today - his defence is he did it with his ex and she found it funny.

For those asking, he said he could have stopped it but did force it out on purpose thinking I’d see the funny side. Obviously things stopped immediately and I’m not sure I’ll be able to be intimate with him again as it stands..

I once knew a couple that were into this sort of stuff..

They played a game that they called "Dutch Ovens" which involved them taking it in turns to fart in bed. Then the other one would go under the covers and see how long they could stay there.....

I have no idea how they could each produce farts to order....🤔

Whatever floats your boat, I suppose.....

Fannybycandlelight · 14/04/2025 01:30

Amz98 · 12/04/2025 10:42

TMI probably so apologies but we were doing 69 😑

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That puts a whole different context on it. so not funny in that situation,😮

outerspacepotato · 14/04/2025 01:26

With his sex technique, he'll have all the women running.

Away.

Streaaa · 13/04/2025 23:15

What a disgusting creep.

WilfredsPies · 13/04/2025 22:55

Amz98 · 13/04/2025 20:36

I’ve told him over the phone that we’re done, he didn’t take it very well, said I’m ‘fridgid’ and need to be more adventurous if I want to keep a man 😂

Annoying it’s not worked out but at least it’s still relatively early and plenty more fish in the sea!

How did you not point out that you could have kept him if you’d wanted, and that it was you who was dumping him because he’s fucking weird, not the other way around.

I’ve not conducted a straw poll or anything, but I’m pretty sure that your average man wouldn’t take too kindly to you farting in his face and would be quite happy not to fart in yours. I think you’ll be ok.

ItGhoul · 13/04/2025 21:22

Amz98 · 13/04/2025 20:36

I’ve told him over the phone that we’re done, he didn’t take it very well, said I’m ‘fridgid’ and need to be more adventurous if I want to keep a man 😂

Annoying it’s not worked out but at least it’s still relatively early and plenty more fish in the sea!

I mean, I am relatively ‘adventurous’ but being farted on is not my idea of a good time.

Original poster

Amz98 · 13/04/2025 21:21

My friend pointed out (and I think I read someone else say it on here) that sort of thing probably leads to a more ‘extreme’ form over time 😷

No, no, no! I wish there was a way you could add a warning to ex’s dating profiles!

OP posts:

ThreePointOneFourOneFiveNine · 13/04/2025 21:20

Amz98 · 13/04/2025 20:36

I’ve told him over the phone that we’re done, he didn’t take it very well, said I’m ‘fridgid’ and need to be more adventurous if I want to keep a man 😂

Annoying it’s not worked out but at least it’s still relatively early and plenty more fish in the sea!

Wow! You’ve dodged a bullet there! What a relief you found out sooner rather than later.

ItGhoul · 13/04/2025 21:18

Amz98 · 13/04/2025 15:23

After apologising (seemingly sincerely) yesterday he was inappropriate again last night after a few drinks. Said with a straight face - ‘if you want you can get your revenge on me later’ and it transpires that’s something he was into with his ex, like a fetish 😷😷

I have spoke with a couple of friends about this and both are urging me to leave him, I’m just building up to this today 😥

I did wonder if it was a fetish thing when you first posted, but then thought ‘Nah, if it was a fetish thing he wouldn’t have laughed’. It’s also quite unusual for that fetish to be for the man to be the one who does the farting.

What an utter pillock he must be to assume that this was something you can just casually introduce without a conversation first. I mean, any fetish/kink isn’t something you should just launch into, but particularly THAT one ffs. Surely he must know that 99.9% of the population are very much NOT aroused by flatulence?!

You’ve definitely dodged a bullet and I suspect he will end up being single for a very long time if he just randomly trumps in women’s faces and expects them to enjoy it!

Snugglemonkey · 13/04/2025 21:05

Amz98 · 13/04/2025 15:23

After apologising (seemingly sincerely) yesterday he was inappropriate again last night after a few drinks. Said with a straight face - ‘if you want you can get your revenge on me later’ and it transpires that’s something he was into with his ex, like a fetish 😷😷

I have spoke with a couple of friends about this and both are urging me to leave him, I’m just building up to this today 😥

Jesus.where di you start with that. Firstly, I couldn't deal with that fetish. But most importantly, fetishistic things are not to be just included in sexual situations without the agreement of both parties. There should be discussion. I like me kink, but consent is incredibly important. I would feel violated by that tbh.

StrangerThings1 · 13/04/2025 20:44

Amz98 · 13/04/2025 20:36

I’ve told him over the phone that we’re done, he didn’t take it very well, said I’m ‘fridgid’ and need to be more adventurous if I want to keep a man 😂

Annoying it’s not worked out but at least it’s still relatively early and plenty more fish in the sea!

OMG, you dodged a bullet, he showed his true colours in that comment he made!

Be glad you didn’t get in any deeper into that relationship

UndermyShoeJoe · 13/04/2025 20:43

Fridgid because you don’t want someone farting in your face 🤣🤣

I’m sure there are many more men who don’t want face farting either way than there are who do.

what a looser. Him not you.

2025willbemytime · 13/04/2025 20:36

Amz98 · 12/04/2025 16:17

He has apologised again today - his defence is he did it with his ex and she found it funny.

For those asking, he said he could have stopped it but did force it out on purpose thinking I’d see the funny side. Obviously things stopped immediately and I’m not sure I’ll be able to be intimate with him again as it stands..

Even worse that he's bringing his ex into it and treating women as if we are all the same.

Original poster

Amz98 · 13/04/2025 20:36

I’ve told him over the phone that we’re done, he didn’t take it very well, said I’m ‘fridgid’ and need to be more adventurous if I want to keep a man 😂

Annoying it’s not worked out but at least it’s still relatively early and plenty more fish in the sea!

OP posts:

2025willbemytime · 13/04/2025 20:24

It's all in the delivery and how they act. I had a vaguely related experience but he handled it perfectly. No embarrassment on either side. No issue at all. But then we've known each other forever and we love each other.

Yours? Rubbish.

Snugglemonkey · 13/04/2025 20:23

Amz98 · 12/04/2025 10:42

TMI probably so apologies but we were doing 69 😑

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It was disrespectful and would be over for me.

OriginalUsername2 · 13/04/2025 20:21

Are kinks supposed to make you crack up laughing though? 🤔

Either way, there’s no going back is there, what a rotten lad.

Faz469 · 13/04/2025 18:40

Poppyseeds79 · 12/04/2025 10:43

Oh no! See yes, to me that's absolutely worse as you've got your face down there 🤮

I'd find it massively disrespectful and it'd put me right off him.

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I find farts funny. But for me... in that position with a forced fart.... he'd be dumped.

ReadingSoManyThreads · 13/04/2025 18:29

4forksache · 13/04/2025 17:47

having made it clear it’s not acceptable, however funny his ex found it, I’d give him one last chance if he’s otherwise great.
Then it’s up to him!

Seems a shame to give up a good relationship for something so silly.

Read the updates. It's his FETISH. One that he inflicted on her without any discussion or consent. It's not something silly, it's something that degrades and disrespects the OP and she's rightfully not ok with that.

HowToBuy · 13/04/2025 17:47

4forksache · 13/04/2025 17:47

having made it clear it’s not acceptable, however funny his ex found it, I’d give him one last chance if he’s otherwise great.
Then it’s up to him!

Seems a shame to give up a good relationship for something so silly.

You really need to read the full thread… she needs to dump this sick loser

Poppyseeds79 · 13/04/2025 17:47

I think it's more like a gateway kink... You can guarantee he's seeing if you're okay with it... And then suggesting something worse bodily fluids wise.

4forksache · 13/04/2025 17:47

having made it clear it’s not acceptable, however funny his ex found it, I’d give him one last chance if he’s otherwise great.
Then it’s up to him!

Seems a shame to give up a good relationship for something so silly.

HowToBuy · 13/04/2025 17:45

And is a fart fetish not a real sign that he is turned on by disrespecting and degrading women? How could you be turned on by farting in someone’s face? And I’m so far from being a prude, I understand and have indulged in an awful lot of what some might call risqué sexual behaviour and fetishes… but farting in your face? Really? 🤮