fake confession...... am at a lost how to advice dd

At 16 that is more than a 'late bloomer' tbh. Does she have additional needs? That would make a difference in terms of 'bullying' to my mind

I'd be telling my daughter to stay away from them. It doesn't matter if she likes interacting with them, they've shown they like to make fun of her

I'd also be talking about her reaction to it. Unless someone tells you themselves that they like you, when they're sober, AND their actions back this up, AND you like them too, I think it's best to ignore or even distance yourself from this person. She should not really be repeatedly probing someone to find out their feelings about her, or anyone, if the person hasn't brought it up themselves. It sounded like she pushed so hard that the original friend didn't want to admit her mates made it up so she just said yeah to make it go away. And it also sounded like your daughter agreed to something that she wasn't comfortable with or sure about just to please her friend, which is also really unhealthy. I'm not victim blaming, what these girls did was wrong and unfair on your daughter, but your daughters reaction is a bit worrying

Don't you think it would have been a good idea to mention that your daughter has SEN?

My children are ND and they need a lot of support in social interactions, I think you've been really quite negligent in exposing your DD to these confusing and overwhelming social dynamics.

Yes your DD should be able to trust people, but that's not how the world works. You should be teaching her to respect herself, to find proper friends (not one's who treat her as "entertainment") and to be savvy in social media.

If it had been a boy who was harassing her into dating him would you be so blasé?

She has lost it. Your daughter has done the right thing by cutting them off. Let it die.

Don't encourage her to accept bad treatment just to hold on to some crumbs.

If she doesn't learn to see herself with more value and worth than this, she will have a lifetime of abusive and toxic partners and friendships.

It doesn't matter that the girl made her feel good about herself sometimes. The girl is being mean, your DD deserves better than that.

Advise her to draw a line under any friendship with these girls and ignore them at school. Spend time with her other friends and put it behind her.

You dd should become less available to these girls. Can she find someone or somewhere else to hang around so she is ‘too busy’ to interact? Including the one she likes, who is as dangerous as the rest of them.

It's also yes a bullying tactic used by girls to try and out someone who they think is gay. These girls aren't your DDs friends and yes I would go to the head of year

I'm a bit confused and as to who has done what. Does your DD actually fancy this girl and want to date her? Does your DD have SN? Why does she not understand what dating means at 16?

Either way these girls are bullying your DD. They are pretending she is their friend and then mocking her. If girl 1 was your DDs friend she would have immediately shut this down with your DD

Your DD sounds incredibly naive and a bit unsociable aware, this is exactly the type of girl the popular girls will bully and pull this technique on. Although I think 16 is a bit old for this it's a bullying technique used since the beginning of time

Classic bullying tactic. Pretend someone’s romantically interested, keep pushing until victim is lured in, then reject them and laugh at them. Given the details, I think it’s possible the girls in question are homophobic and were trying to out your DD as gay. I think it possibly is worth reporting to head of year because of that aspect.

Is it possible your DD maybe does like this girl. Or at least did? If she was entertaining the idea of them being a “thing.” It’s unlikely your DD thought it meant just being “besties”

Either way, it’s all very Mean Girls and I would advise watching this with your daughter.

I highly encourage your daughter to go back to school and sarcastically say “Must be because I have a biiiig lesbian crush on you!” And laugh heartily back at them.

They are not her friends !!! She was groomed into thinking that so that they could take the piss afterwards laughing at how naïve she is. Tell her to ONLY interact online with friends she sees irl to start with. She seems vulnerable and insecure and should stay away from popular girls who most often than not are mean girls.

I’d make the school aware. They’ll know if these girls have done this kind of thing before and will know how best to handle it.

I'm trying to think how best to phrase this but you do seem to have some trouble understanding typical social interaction yourself OP. You do mention keeping to yourself as a teenager. Is there someone like a guidance counsellor or equivalent that your DD could talk to about what healthy friendship looks like?

You sound very immature I'm sceptical that this is real. If anyone was treating my child like that I'd be telling her to step away immediately. You said she already has other friends. Why bother with people that don't treat her nicely. Are they just friends on SM if so thats not a real friend. Is your child actually gay? Why would she entertain dating someone of the same sex to carry on a friendship? If she is not why are you not pissed off that the girls are taking the piss trying to coerce her into saying she is. Sounds to me like they are taking the absolute piss out of your kid and your letting it happen.

No don’t go to head of year. Just keep evidence in case it escalates. If it escalates when she’s back at school then do.

is send her to some drama classes to build her self confidence. She needs to learn to advocate for herself and not be pushed around.

They’re pulling a shitty little prank. Has she screen shotted it? She should just in case it escalates.

she should ignore, confronting or engaging won’t go well.