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Sexual comment at soft play area - is this harassment?

35 replies

GemmaJ95 · 11/04/2025 10:45

Would you consider this harassment/offensive? At soft play with my young DS yesterday, I was helping him navigate an area so was more or less on all fours in an unflattering position. I sensed someone had been waiting behind me for a short while, so once he was through I got up and said sorry a bit flustered.

It was a man with his (I assume) daughter and he just said to me ‘ don’t worry, I could admire that view all day ‘, I awkwardly moved away.

I have been thinking about it since and am kicking myself for not saying something!

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StartAnew · 11/04/2025 18:40

Dillydollydingdong · 11/04/2025 18:34

Oh FFS. It was just a light hearted comment, and meant to be a compliment. If the man had meant to be offensive he could have said a lot worse than that!

Are you perhaps a man?

NormasArse · 11/04/2025 18:37

StartAnew · 11/04/2025 11:41

Maybe have an answer ready for the next time something like that happens.
'The 1970s would like their creepy comment back,' maybe. You'll think of something.

‘I’d rather you didn’t, thank you.’ Delivered with a poker face.

LegoHouse274 · 11/04/2025 18:35

DonnaBanana · 11/04/2025 18:33

Maybe he’s a single dad looking for love, they are in short supply sadly

Definitely not "sadly" if "they" think this is acceptable behaviour...

Dillydollydingdong · 11/04/2025 18:34

Oh FFS. It was just a light hearted comment, and meant to be a compliment. If the man had meant to be offensive he could have said a lot worse than that!

DonnaBanana · 11/04/2025 18:33

Maybe he’s a single dad looking for love, they are in short supply sadly

Sometimeswinning · 11/04/2025 18:30

AquaPeer · 11/04/2025 15:06

God forbid a victim of sexual harassment doesn’t behave in a way you find acceptable

Good god! Someone was a bit creepy. Victim 😂🙄

MattCauthon · 11/04/2025 15:14

PassingStranger · 11/04/2025 13:40

Wonderful not in front of children.

There are better ways.

I hope my children will see me modelling appropriate behaviour when I am being harassed or the recipient of inappropriate comments from random strangers. I'd have no issue telling a man in this situation he's being a dick. And i'd be totally fine with my children seeing that.

AquaPeer · 11/04/2025 15:06

PassingStranger · 11/04/2025 13:40

Wonderful not in front of children.

There are better ways.

God forbid a victim of sexual harassment doesn’t behave in a way you find acceptable

PassingStranger · 11/04/2025 13:40

AquaPeer · 11/04/2025 11:27

Yes 100% creep. I don’t think that people who work in a soft play centre would be able to do anything but I would’ve told him to F off and called him a perv

Wonderful not in front of children.

There are better ways.

jellyfishperiwinkle · 11/04/2025 13:38

Ugh, what a creep.

FigTreeInEurope · 11/04/2025 13:37

housethatbuiltme · 11/04/2025 12:53

Meh, you where both stuck in a small space with your kids.

He made a defusing 'dont worry' joke with a thinly veil compliment about the awkwardness of it because you seemed embarrassed. I wouldn't have even thought twice about it, I HIGHLY doubt he was coming on to you.

He didn't chase you into a hole and ram his crotch in your face like a sex pest, you where both doing what parents do in a soft play and really it was your arse rammed in his face.

No, every man knows this is wrong, and he was absolutely fishing to see how it was recieved. Its not a compliment, and only a completely ignorant, sleeze bag would think otherwise. Top notch creepy fuckery. The absence of actual physical sexual assault doesn't justify it in the slightest.

housethatbuiltme · 11/04/2025 12:53

Meh, you where both stuck in a small space with your kids.

He made a defusing 'dont worry' joke with a thinly veil compliment about the awkwardness of it because you seemed embarrassed. I wouldn't have even thought twice about it, I HIGHLY doubt he was coming on to you.

He didn't chase you into a hole and ram his crotch in your face like a sex pest, you where both doing what parents do in a soft play and really it was your arse rammed in his face.

Proudtobeanortherner · 11/04/2025 12:52

With his daughter? I’d have asked him how he would feel if someone said that her; possibly he’d have squirmed and given it some thought 🤞
oh but wait, maybe not, he’s a man and wouldn’t see the correlation 🥺😡

jellybe · 11/04/2025 12:37

Ahh clicked the wrong vote you are not being unreasonable! What a creep!

MattCauthon · 11/04/2025 12:36

Ick so awful.

Don't beat yourself up for not saying anything - that's a pretty oturageously inappropriate comment and you were understandably thrown. You could say something to staff but I guarantee that they'll do nothing either ,mostly becuase they'll have no idea what they can do.

Awful awful man. I'm sorry that happened to you.

Sometimeswinning · 11/04/2025 12:22

I’d laugh it off. Or if I was offended given him a bit of an eye roll. If he’d have said thank fuck you’ve moved that massive blockage from my eyeline I’d get why you were upset.

Devilsmommy · 11/04/2025 12:17

I wouldn't call it harassment unless he made multiple comments but it's definitely creepy fucker behaviour. Tell him to fuck off if it happens again and definitely tell a member of staff. I can't believe some men really believe this kind of crap is ok. Nowadays though it seems like as it's only a woman being made to feel uncomfortable then who gives a shit🤷 misogyny everywhere unfortunately

Growlybear83 · 11/04/2025 12:14

I wouldn’t class it as harassment. It was probably a bit unnecessary, but is something g I would just laugh off and not give a second thought to.

MakeYourOwnMusicStartYourOwnDance · 11/04/2025 12:11

JoeyJoeyJoeyJoey · 11/04/2025 10:53

Eeew why do men think that’s acceptable, I would have told the mother to keep an eye on her pervy husband while in a children’s setting.

Like you don't have enough to do running after your toddlers in those places without having to keep an eye on your husband being a nobhead too 😭😂
Feck that lol

MakeYourOwnMusicStartYourOwnDance · 11/04/2025 12:08

I wouldn't say harassment as it was just a one off comment - definitely an "eww WTF!" moment though!

SpringIsSpringing25 · 11/04/2025 12:06

JoeyJoeyJoeyJoey · 11/04/2025 10:53

Eeew why do men think that’s acceptable, I would have told the mother to keep an eye on her pervy husband while in a children’s setting.

Why would you assume the mother was there?

Why would you assume it's her responsibility to keep him on a lead?

I'm old enough to call that banter, bit of a laugh, everything is so serious these , I honestly don't think it's any coincidence that there is such an increase in anxiety, depression and other mental health problems.

Unpopular opinion, I know, but it's mine, no need to tell me how wrong I am🙄

StrongLazyVague · 11/04/2025 11:56

ItGhoul · 11/04/2025 11:52

The spirit of Sid James lives on.

Honestly, are these men beamed in from the 1970s or something? Such tedious creeps.

Yes, it is like time travel, isn't it?

While I do vaguely wonder whether they would wilt and run screaming if you looked them up and down, stone-faced, as if you were considering making an offer on a slightly substandard sheep at a mart, and said 'OK, I've got ten minutes. The ball pit, now. You'd better be really good.'

Probably safer to say 'I'm embarrassed for you that you think that's an acceptable thing to say, especially in front of a little girl. Who will be dealing with this in future if men still think this is normal behaviour.'

ItGhoul · 11/04/2025 11:52

The spirit of Sid James lives on.

Honestly, are these men beamed in from the 1970s or something? Such tedious creeps.

RubberDuckyURtheone · 11/04/2025 11:45

Yuk, don't kick yourself it's hard to respond in those situations, think I would have smiled politely and seethed later. At best I might have managed a raised eyebrow. What a dick 🤮

StartAnew · 11/04/2025 11:41

Maybe have an answer ready for the next time something like that happens.
'The 1970s would like their creepy comment back,' maybe. You'll think of something.

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