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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To think the agent has swallowed a thesaurus?

32 replies

ItsLikeClimbingAMounjaro · 10/04/2025 18:36

Just having a browse online, dreaming of living by the sea.

This listing has really irritated me. Is it my age? Hormones? Am I tired?

The place is beautiful but the wordy listing has really made angry 🤬🤣

OP posts:
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BrightOrangeDahlias · 10/04/2025 22:05

MistressoftheDarkSide · 10/04/2025 20:55

Well, it was a two floor Victorian affair, and in quite a poor state, although the second time we rented it we were able to upgrade it a bit, you know things like a proper functioning kitchen. Top floor had two good sized bedrooms and a bathroom big enough to be a bedroom.

First floor had two pretty large reception rooms and the kitchen was a reasonable size.

So we experienced:

My son, primary aged, seeing an old woman sitting in a rocking chair outside the bathroom door a few times. The first time it happened, we found him downstairs when we went to get him up for breakfast, under the dining table and he'd pulled in the chairs around him for protection.

What was really weird about that was that when we moved in, the bathroom door had a bolt on the outside. We thought maybe it was for security, as the bathroom and bedroom on that side looked out over the arcade roof with a gully running the length that one could, in the event of fire or maintenance, use to get along the front of the building. But given that my son described this woman as effectively guarding the door, we did start having some rather sinister thoughts.....

I twice saw a little boy - in broad daylight. The first time I was passing the sitting room door on my way into the kitchen carrying a basket of washing, and thought I saw my son dancing in front of the TV. I took one step back to make some encouraging comment, and the room was empty, the TV was off and he was upstairs engrossed in his Lego.

The second time I was sitting just inside the sitting room door, reading a paper - again, broad daylight. I saw a small boy crawl past me into the room, thought it was my son but when I raised my head to speak to him, the room was empty. Again, my son was elsewhere.

On another occasion, my Mum and I were having a cuppa and a catch up in the front room, mid-morning, bright sunny day, hustle and bustle going on in the arcade below. My sons cat, an anti-social specimen who only had time for my son really and rarely graced us with his presence, suddenly started stalking into the room. You know, the proper ears flat, belly on floor slow stalking when they're after something. We both clocked him, but said nothing, to see what would happen. Now by the fireplace we had a stand on vibrating plate exercise thing, a fad of my EXH that had become the spot where we kept a cat igloo on the base, because it fit well and was out of any draughts. Cat stalked almost all the way up to it, growling, and then me and my Mum both heard what we could only describe as an electronic demonic laugh com8ng from this cat igloo. Cat exited the room in the style of a Harrier jump jet and thundered up the stairs, and we also jumped as a result.

My Mum was the least woo person ever, and once we'd made sure that there was no rogue toy or other possible source of the weird noise, even she accepted it was bloody weird.

There's more, but what was really interesting was that two sets of tenants afterwards reported poltergeist activity completely independent of us, and each other, with no contact between them. I found this out from my landlady, a few years after we'd moved out.

Also, I never really felt scared or threatened, it was just as though we sort of shared with invisible lodgers. We told my son not to be scared, and to talk to anyone he saw, and he's 30 now, and pretty unscathed.

I could never find out any meaningful history unfortunately although I did try and research.

The flat's been completely renovated now.

Had some happy times there 🫠

Mumsnet so need a 😱reaction button!

ProLilly · 10/04/2025 21:54

They did a Joey!

ItsLikeClimbingAMounjaro · 10/04/2025 21:32

@MistressoftheDarkSidethat sounds so scary. The demonic laugh 😱.

Our old place had some weird happenings. I never felt alone. Things went missing, but really, it was just a feeling. DH was amused until he saw an unexplainable shadow. We had the house cleansed then!!

I can't believe your landlady knew all these stories but didn't get help in! 😳

OP posts:
Tagyoureit · 10/04/2025 21:01

Regards

Baby Kangeroo Tribbiani

FairlyTired · 10/04/2025 20:57

They're targeting a pretentious client base.

MistressoftheDarkSide · 10/04/2025 20:55

Well, it was a two floor Victorian affair, and in quite a poor state, although the second time we rented it we were able to upgrade it a bit, you know things like a proper functioning kitchen. Top floor had two good sized bedrooms and a bathroom big enough to be a bedroom.

First floor had two pretty large reception rooms and the kitchen was a reasonable size.

So we experienced:

My son, primary aged, seeing an old woman sitting in a rocking chair outside the bathroom door a few times. The first time it happened, we found him downstairs when we went to get him up for breakfast, under the dining table and he'd pulled in the chairs around him for protection.

What was really weird about that was that when we moved in, the bathroom door had a bolt on the outside. We thought maybe it was for security, as the bathroom and bedroom on that side looked out over the arcade roof with a gully running the length that one could, in the event of fire or maintenance, use to get along the front of the building. But given that my son described this woman as effectively guarding the door, we did start having some rather sinister thoughts.....

I twice saw a little boy - in broad daylight. The first time I was passing the sitting room door on my way into the kitchen carrying a basket of washing, and thought I saw my son dancing in front of the TV. I took one step back to make some encouraging comment, and the room was empty, the TV was off and he was upstairs engrossed in his Lego.

The second time I was sitting just inside the sitting room door, reading a paper - again, broad daylight. I saw a small boy crawl past me into the room, thought it was my son but when I raised my head to speak to him, the room was empty. Again, my son was elsewhere.

On another occasion, my Mum and I were having a cuppa and a catch up in the front room, mid-morning, bright sunny day, hustle and bustle going on in the arcade below. My sons cat, an anti-social specimen who only had time for my son really and rarely graced us with his presence, suddenly started stalking into the room. You know, the proper ears flat, belly on floor slow stalking when they're after something. We both clocked him, but said nothing, to see what would happen. Now by the fireplace we had a stand on vibrating plate exercise thing, a fad of my EXH that had become the spot where we kept a cat igloo on the base, because it fit well and was out of any draughts. Cat stalked almost all the way up to it, growling, and then me and my Mum both heard what we could only describe as an electronic demonic laugh com8ng from this cat igloo. Cat exited the room in the style of a Harrier jump jet and thundered up the stairs, and we also jumped as a result.

My Mum was the least woo person ever, and once we'd made sure that there was no rogue toy or other possible source of the weird noise, even she accepted it was bloody weird.

There's more, but what was really interesting was that two sets of tenants afterwards reported poltergeist activity completely independent of us, and each other, with no contact between them. I found this out from my landlady, a few years after we'd moved out.

Also, I never really felt scared or threatened, it was just as though we sort of shared with invisible lodgers. We told my son not to be scared, and to talk to anyone he saw, and he's 30 now, and pretty unscathed.

I could never find out any meaningful history unfortunately although I did try and research.

The flat's been completely renovated now.

Had some happy times there 🫠

PsychoHotSauce · 10/04/2025 19:54

cakeandteaandcake · 10/04/2025 19:06

Well they must surely have approved it before it went online!

And not have realised it was written by a bot, who won't get paid any of the hefty commission! Lazy sods!

Trumpsgoneloco · 10/04/2025 19:49

didn't realise it was just the downstairs 😆 still a lot of sq ft.

ItsLikeClimbingAMounjaro · 10/04/2025 19:48

MistressoftheDarkSide · 10/04/2025 19:39

Depending on when, we might have been neighbours 😂 twice lived in a very haunted flat above the card shop next door to the continental style cafe x (Long, weird story lol).

Ooo tell us about the haunted flat!

OP posts:
Trumpsgoneloco · 10/04/2025 19:46

Wow what a house & relatively cheap!

MistressoftheDarkSide · 10/04/2025 19:39

thesoundofwildgeese · 10/04/2025 19:27

Indeed, Westbourne is not exactly a "village". Many years ago, I rented a couple of rooms above a hairdressers in the Arcade.

Depending on when, we might have been neighbours 😂 twice lived in a very haunted flat above the card shop next door to the continental style cafe x (Long, weird story lol).

PigInADuvet · 10/04/2025 19:36

It's not for me. Firstly with that layout I'd get lost, and secondly scooping leaves from the trees of the pool would drive me potty.

Jabberwok · 10/04/2025 19:36

Is this a case of trying to make a silk purse out of a sows ear? I expect the owners have been thumping on about the grandeur, the refinement....it's s bloody flat

Also the pictures are confusing...none of the rooms look square! The kitchen seems to take up most of the flat with 3 dining tables (I think)

Sminty2 · 10/04/2025 19:34

BaronessBomburst · 10/04/2025 19:31

The traffic in the summer...... You'll never be able to get your car out.

Maybe but it might be so lovely on the beach, I wouldn’t care.

TheReturnOfFeathersMcGraw · 10/04/2025 19:34

The bolding definitely suggests ChatGPT

Mudlarking · 10/04/2025 19:34

Haha it’s positively frothing!!

BaronessBomburst · 10/04/2025 19:31

The traffic in the summer...... You'll never be able to get your car out.

Upsidedownsides · 10/04/2025 19:29

Don’t known how it’s described as a house when it’s actually a FLAT

thesoundofwildgeese · 10/04/2025 19:27

MistressoftheDarkSide · 10/04/2025 18:57

Heh heh heh x

I live near here (relatively). Westbourne Village indeed. Heh heh heh.

Indeed, Westbourne is not exactly a "village". Many years ago, I rented a couple of rooms above a hairdressers in the Arcade.

ItsLikeClimbingAMounjaro · 10/04/2025 19:25

Sminty2 · 10/04/2025 19:20

I’ve been doing the same thing. Dreaming of packing up the cat and my books. I could spend my days beach combing, drawing and making new friends.

https://www.rightmove.co.uk/properties/158773718#/?channel=RES_BUY

Much more natural write-up. Snap it up (save it from becoming a wasted second home)!

OP posts:
AnSolas · 10/04/2025 19:09

Ugly photos for that price band😬

MistressoftheDarkSide · 10/04/2025 19:08

It did used to have connections to a Baronet. There's a little album and some history on Flickr if your curiosity is piqued.

cakeandteaandcake · 10/04/2025 19:06

PsychoHotSauce · 10/04/2025 18:52

Almost certainly Chat GPT (wielded by a lazy amateur)... I'd be furious with that description if I were the vendor!

Well they must surely have approved it before it went online!

Nesbi · 10/04/2025 19:01

I guess you’re not really allowed to say that it has bland but relatively inoffensive interiors and that the Edwardian architecture is confused, giving size but without real character or presence.