Colleagues spoke about me on Teams call thinking I wasn’t there - do I say anything

I frequently answer the door. If I know a parcel is coming I warn people at the beginning of the meeting it might happen. I've done it on client calls where I know the people. I probably only wouldn't do it during a job interview or very important new client. It seems to be common (ie I see other people and clients do it all the time) and not a big deal.

It would depend on the meeting/ who else was in it/ what was being discussed etc. If I was the one talking to people I hadn’t met before then probably not but if one of my colleagues was and I knew I wouldn’t miss anything/could catch up easily and wouldn’t really be missed then I might. It all depends on the context of the meeting and that specific moment

Agreed

You would do it on a meeting where you had never met the other attendees before?

I do it in some meetings but not others. It depends on the type of meeting, who is in it and how involved I am at that particular point. Others do it too. A meeting in the office can also have interruptions, it’s about weighing it up based on the full context

Agree.

WFH can be very efficient at times, but trying to justify answering the door or other domestic chores during a meeting is ridiculous. I am shocked at how many people think it is normal or professional!

Men who over estimate how competent they come across will still be judged incompetent by their audience.

Exactly this. They will attempt to deflect from their comments by possibly exaggerating your lack of professionalism and your distraction from the job.

Just one very big reason why WFH so often equates to taking the piss.

It will always continue to be true for as long as we continue to feed the narrative. It is impossible to be on it 100% all of the time. That is an impossibly high expectation. Things like menopause have a tendency to put a spanner in the works, and that is an inescapable biological fact.

I'm not, read the quote history. I was responding to @Brefugee who made this about women especially always needing to give 100%. Misogyny isn't just a man thing.

The call being hard work remark is fairly small potatoes. The remark on your looks is rank, and I'd bring it up directly with the person.

I wouldn’t report it. Whatever the official consequences for them, it will just highlight your poor performance. You were tired, unprofessional and answering the door on a work call. You were behaving like an underperforming WFH stereotype. You happened to hear them bitching about you while waiting around for you to get back to the meeting.

If they are pulled up on it, they will respond by talking about how incompetent you are. Who wouldn’t when put in that situation. They will also exaggerate because they will be angry and defensive.

Nope, never said ‘it’s a good job he’s got a great arse’ when a male colleague was having an off day. No.

I wasn't talking about that part, it was in reference to what @ScaredOfDinosaurssaid and @XelaMresponse. Obviously the comment re looks was out of order

Why is that so hard to understand? Some of us just stay out of work gossip, full-stop. If a conversation is trending that way, and it's someone of whom I have a low opinion, I stop it going further by saying "I don't really know [the person] very well" or similar.

@Tbrh are you joking? Did you read what they said about her? It wasn’t the bit about her performance that made my blood boil. Read it again.

You've never spoken badly about a colleague, even when they deserved it?

Sharon, Tracey. I heard what you said about me on the teams meeting and found it very unprofessional. What do you have to say about it? Hand the floor over to them. They will either be extremely uncomfortable or start blustering. Then I'd tell them to turn off tea.s/zoom next time they want to be nasty about a colleague. You could also say you are considering reporting it.
I have to try very hard not to laugh when doing this.
I've been working for 45 years and really don't give a shit any more.

OP, I hope you're feeling a bit better this morning.

Please do something. Report to their line managers or yours if you feel able but at the VERY least, do send them an email telling them you heard and it's complely unacceptable. Preferably the line manager route, but something.

Please do not let them get away with this and please do not listen to the people on this thread who blame you for not being on top of your game for one meeting. Its discrimination, its hugely unprofessional and its just plain mean. Please don't put up with it, for your own sake and for others.

Well that too. and it also shows that all the legislation and rules and protection we have in place has made not one scrap of difference to men’s attitudes the minute they think they can get away with it. Really bloody disheartening.

REPORT IT OP FOR SLL OF OUR SAKES!

So if someone’s being dopey on a work call, it’s OK to comment on their appearance and allude to their love life? And they have to apologise?

What I find depressing about this thread is how so many women appear to be untrained on sex discrimination in the workplace.

And how some are even justifying it or saying they’d let it go! Why would you allow a work colleague to potentially break the law in this way? Seems it was pointless fighting for legal rights if people don’t want to enforce them. That’s why men like this continue to behave this way. Because they’re ignorant or unafraid of the repercussions.

There’s a simple test for sexism: Would this be said to/about a man? If the answer’s no, it’s likely a sexist remark. And sexist remarks in the workplace are sex discrimination, which is against the law.

I'd shame them with kindness too.

Also, I'd mention your performance and how you will rectify it to your manager.

But you admit you were being dopey on the call You over reacted big time with the tears and nit carrying on the call, what you should have done is say sorry for being distracted. Nothing to report.