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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

Do you think pet owners who travel are cruel?

66 replies

BePoliteOpalQuail · 10/04/2025 10:21

I mean for a couple of nights here and there, every few months. Not talking about getting a pet then leaving it weeks on end, and obviously the pet would be left with a trusted sitter or in a cattery/kennels.

OP posts:

DuckieDodgyHedgyPiggy · 10/04/2025 10:32

I think some pets suffer with separation anxiety. But this can be overcome, ideally when they are young.
I used to housesit for a guy who was often away on business. I formed a special bond with his dog. The dog loved his owner but I can guarantee that the dog had a great time with me because I was able to devote all my time to him, and we had a lot of fun exploring the countryside.

PyrannosaurusRex · 10/04/2025 10:31

Of course not. DH and I go away for several nights a month and the dogs go to kennels which they love - they enjoy way more dog interaction/supervised play than they do on a normal day with us, they usually get a bath, and the owners know them well. Dogs love a routine, but it’s not good to make their lives so regimented and unchanging that any little deviation sets off anxiety. A bit of safe novelty is a positive thing.

thenletskeepdancing · 10/04/2025 10:29

We just got back from 7 nights away for the first time in 3 years, since getting our rescue cat. We had a trusted person come every day to spend some time here and feed her and do her litter. We have done a single night away on occasion during this time with no issues. This time cat was understandably a bit sad and didn’t come out much for the sitter. She is clingy and very happy now we are home. We needed to go away for family reasons. We did worry about her and had contact with sitter throughout. Our dear little cat needs to get used to us being away on occasion as it isn’t practical to assume we would never go away.

ilovesooty · 10/04/2025 10:26

No. My cats go to a regular cattery if I'm away longer than overnight. I love them very much but I'm not prepared never to go away.

EmmaEmEmz · 10/04/2025 10:25

Of course not.

The second situation - leaving them for weeks or months on end, yes, but for a few days or a week every so often, absolutely not. We take our dogs with us most of the time because a) I miss them too much being away from them and b) our breakdown and holidays tend to be places where we can easily take them, but I have no hesitation for a few days if we go somewhere unsuitable. We have an amazing profesional dog boarder that ours go to when we can't take them who looks after them like they're her own, and they love their time there.

bettydavieseyes · 10/04/2025 10:25

Why is it cruel? I know a couple who never go anywhere without their dog and this seems extreme to me. I can only conclude they don't want to and are happy with that. I have 2 small dogs and happily leave them with family when we go away, often a night or 2 a month and a couple of holidays a year.

Shirkingly · 10/04/2025 10:25

BePoliteOpalQuail · 10/04/2025 10:24

No, I'm saying they absolutely should. Sorry should've been clearer, but I've just been made to feel irresponsible for leaving her with a sitter for 2 days.

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By whom?

Snorlaxo · 10/04/2025 10:24

It’s good business for your friend.

People have good reasons to travel like seeing friends and family so it’s unfair to judge. Ideally some pets would get to travel eg dog going to the beach but some pets can’t travel really

Original poster

BePoliteOpalQuail · 10/04/2025 10:24

Grumpyoldpersonwithcats · 10/04/2025 10:23

I may have misunderstood - but are you saying that pet owners should never go away for a night or two?

No, I'm saying they absolutely should. Sorry should've been clearer, but I've just been made to feel irresponsible for leaving her with a sitter for 2 days.

OP posts:

Coali · 10/04/2025 10:24

Does your friend only work for one family?! I would imagine a good pet sitter should have bookings every week, how would they survive?

Shirkingly · 10/04/2025 10:24

No, everyone who gets a pet should have to sign a legally-binding document saying they will never leave their house for more than four hours at a time.