Would you do this or is it morally a shit thing to do?

I would certainly make a formal complaint and see how they deal with it.

Surely the lawyer said you won't get an instant payout, it depends how the company deal with your complaint first? It doesn't sound like they have done anything wrong yet.

I would definitely formally complain, but wouldn't expect a pay out. He shouldn't be able to treat people that way.

They mentioned a few months wages above

I think you are either leaving a lot of info out or you have been unofficially/incorrectly advised.

Any “payout” would be against the company, not the individual. Have they not followed the correct procedures to deal with your grievance? It sounds from your post that they have encouraged a complaint so that they can formally investigate further? But you are wording it like they have encouraged a complaint so you can sue the manager? Which is not what happens.

I don’t know any professional who, at this stage, would even discuss numbers of compensation. The £25k seems like an arbitrary number plucked from nowhere.

I think you need to be extremely careful in how you proceed and get better advice.

Presumably you're an adult with a few years experience under your belt, within the working world. Imagine a much younger person starting, perhaps it's their first full-time job after university or even school/6th form and their new boss is Mr Knobhead....someone without your experience both in life and working, would find a situation like you've found yourself in, much harder to deal with. For the next poor person who may encounter this dick, you need to make a formal complaint. We all have personal things going on at home, but that doesn't mean it's an excuse to treat colleagues like shit.

There is the right thing, and then there is reality. Morally you are doing nothing wrong. When people don't sort their issues out and dump them on others its never good for the company.

I wonder if you have to complain to get them to investigate it properly and then can actually do something about it. His actions are his choice, and if he is having issues then he needs to something abou them.

I often think these things are morally wrong if you don’t report it. If he behaves like this with you then he will be doing it to other people. He won’t stop. The next person may not have your strength of character to deal with this. Report it. It is his problem and he needs to be stopped.

I would put the formal complaint in and start the internal process. The process is likely to have several stages - you should be able to get a copy of the formal process your employer follows, from HR. In my experience it can be a lengthy process which left me mentally and physically exhausted and didn’t achieve the outcome I had hoped for. In my case it was bullying and I hoped he would lose his job. In fact he was just redeployed within the organisation no doubt to do the same to someone else.

I am surprised a lawyer is talking about settlements when you haven’t even started the internal process. I am not sure why they would pay you £25k. If you are in a union speak to them or otherwise as others have said, you could speak the ACAS.

Good luck whatever you decide to do.

And if there was any retaliation after the fact, that you’d have grounds for a bigger settlement

I would report - if you dont he may continue doing it

It is not your responsibility to do it, so dont feel guilty if you dont, but I think you should

Put In the complaint then try as much as possible to detach emotionally from it. Be factual and professional, and know you haven’t done anything wrong by raising it.

Do it. I was pushed out after i returned from mat leave by my boss and mat cover (male). I sjgned off suck as it was making me depressed and triggered PND, I raised a grievance, I didnt spare any one of those pricks. They Settled with a years pay.

Tbh, you shouldn’t have to make a formal complaint. This should have been sorted out as soon as it was raised, and you should be feeling happy again and wanting to stay.
It hasn’t been sorted out, so you owe it to future employees to make the complaint and ensure it can’t happen to someone else (perhaps it already is!).

Good luck with your interviews- hope you get a great new job. xx

What personal problems?

I work with people who have had sick children, been very ill themselves, have money issues and husbands have run off with someone else……. and they still manage to be nice, kind and professional.

This dickhead bully deserves no empathy or leeway. If you get a payout, you will have deserved it.

However, I’ve worked in HR and their job is to protect the business so be careful.

I agree with this.

I left my last job due to my line manager. The entire time I was in that role (4 years) I was told about her behaviour forcing people to leave. I left but wanted to not make waves in what is a small industry. I regret it a very great deal. She lasted another two years and was then encouraged to leave after someone DID complain.

My former colleagues had a party to celebrate her leaving- one to which she was not invited.

I don’t think he’s her manager, just Senior in the department.

Agree people need to be treated with respect.

I would put the complaint in now and see what happens. Don't expect any money from it though. Not saying you wouldn't be entitled, I genuinely don't know, but don't "expect" it.

If you get an offer in the meantime, go back to HR and tell them you have received an offer of employment and what is happening re. your complaint.

If you end up leaving you can very clearly in your resignation letter that it was this managers actions that prompted you to leave, you were very happy there otherwise.

Anybody treating their in-line staff (or any staff for that matter) in a discriminatory/bullying/unprofessional manner needs to be pulled up on it.

If you’re struggling with the moral side of things, think of this in practical terms. This man has, effectively, forced you out of your job by making it untenable to stay. This means that you’re now, unfairly, in a vulnerable position as, even if you get another job, you have no redundancy protection until you’ve been in the role for a couple of years. That compensation money is your security. He owes you that.

Why do you think they are going to offer you a settlement? This isn’t a Constructive Dismissal, they haven’t even started the internal process yet. They aren’t going to give you £25k based on what you said.

The Internal complaints / grievance process should have a timescale attached to it, and may not come out with the findings that you expect.

HR are not there for you, they are there to protect the interested of the company.

YABU! You owe him nothing. Bloody complain! He needs to know this behaviour is not OK.

I took on a bully and it turned out that in doing so I empowered three other women to do the same- we had all been suffering in silence from misogynistic and sexist behaviour. The man concerned wept in front of me as he said he thought we were friends and his appalling behaviour was banter. I stayed and he changed his behaviour towards women so it did do some good, but more than anything else I felt so much better for calling him out.

I can't see why you'd get any money/payout. But you should still make a formal complaint about him. Why haven't you done this already if HR said to do so? HR can't really do anything until people are prepared to put stuff in writing/make it formal??? Have you done this yet? You have to give HR the opportunity to sort things out before you can think about claims.

But yes, I'd keep job hunting because even if you do make a formal complaint the chances are he will be spoken to, given opportunity to improve his behaviour rather than being sacked though I appreciate this depends how bad the stuff that he's said/done is.

OP sorry you’ve been through this. It’s awful. I say this kindly, you’re making excuses for him and that will make him think it’s ok to be a shit because he’s got stuff going on. We all have our own crap to deal with, just most of us don’t bring it to work. Please make the complaint. If you drop it half way through that’s fine if that’s what you need to do to protect your own mental health, but do make it. How dare he treat you like this! You don’t deserve it and he needs to learn that!

assuming your not in a union as you have sought legal advice…

In order to obtain any settlement it needs to start with a grievance. You can only do that whilst employed in the company not after. Get the policy and look at it. Grievances are awful for all included. You have to be clear about what you want

at the same time you can go to acas and follow their process of mediation. They don’t take sides and don’t advocate for you. This is where a union is incredibly helpful as they work with you.

you can through acas and whilst the grievance is being progressed ask for a settlement agreement. This is generally worked out on the basis of redundancy - generally not always. It would then be up to the employer if they wish to agree to it and there would be a negtiation around terms. All of this whilst the grievance continues. You can negotiate to leave immediately with no notice period and a good reference.

thing is your hr will balance that request likely outcome against tribunal for constructive dismissal.

you will need more legal advice no doubt and it will be incredibly stressful. Think about you and what you want not about him.

This, 100%.