Page 3 | One day old baby in pub

Frenchie01 · 2025-04-09T22:27:02+00:00

So family member gave birth to first baby yesterday afternoon, she's a very young mum only 17 , normal delivery but episiotomy, baby good weight healthy. Was discharged home today and a couple of hours later was at the local pub not drinking alcohol just showing baby off and eating a meal , but am I right in thinking a day old baby baby is really too young to be in a pub or anywhere really , also worried she should be resting as obviously will be sore. Other family members have said I'm being old fashioned am I.

Singaporeannoodle · 13/04/2025 08:09

Fontofallknowledge23 · 12/04/2025 23:15

To be fair this probably boils down to the simple fact a child gave birth to a child. If I’d had a baby at 17 I’d have done exactly the same. I would have wanted to make a point to myself ( and the world) that I was still the same person and this baby wasn’t going to change anything. I just hope this young mother has plenty of support around her. My cousin had a baby at 18 and was blessed to have a lot of support. It changes everything. All these comments from much older mothers about going for a meal at the pub with their husbands really aren’t getting it. I just wish this young mother well and OP too who is showing some concern in the circumstances.

Hardly a child at 17, loads of people have children at that age or even younger myself I had my first at 16 and wouldn't of had the energy for this after Day one. Pretty sure the op herself said she became a mum at 16 and obviously doesn't even approve of it hence this thread

Whether it even matters depends on the pub a large airy one that's not busy isn't going to be a problem it's not like she could of been sat there getting drunk seeing as she is 17. My local pub is always crowded with old men coughing and spluttering everywhere so that would be a different kettle of fish. Last time I went in there I caught a vomiting and diarrhea virus

Cherrytree86 · 13/04/2025 07:58

SwingTheMonkey · 12/04/2025 21:15

No idea what Sonia Fowler has to do with anything. How bizarre.

It absolutely is to do with her. We aren’t simply vessels for producing offspring.
I wasn’t interested in ‘showing off’ anything. Just getting back to normal life. My babies were perfectly fine accompanying me. I never felt the need to convalesce.

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@Unwelcoming

this! Do you really think women don’t matter anymore once they’ve had children? That they cease to exist as a person in their own right and are not just a vessel for babies. Very misogynistic of you.

UrinalCake · 13/04/2025 07:53

This thread should go in Classics.

Smallmercies · 13/04/2025 07:18

CurlewKate · 12/04/2025 19:30

@SmallmerciesExactly why do I disgust you? I don’t think I’ve ever disgusted anyone before!

By ... clutches pearls harder ... taking your precious baby outside!! To be germed all over by little old ladies!!!

ChronicallyOnLime · 13/04/2025 06:56

What has her being 17 got to do with it? Or is that bit of information just a feeder for judgement? ‘Teen girl takes newborn to pub, terrible mother’

No. Babies aren’t puppies, they don’t need to be kept in until vaccinated. If mum felt up to it, baby is healthy and she wasn’t drinking.. what is the actual problem? You just sound judgemental.

SwingTheMonkey · 13/04/2025 06:52

Unwelcoming · 13/04/2025 00:21

Sense of humour? @ Sonia fowler 🤷🏼‍♀️

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I have a sense of humour. I still don’t have any idea what on earth you’re on about.

Unwelcoming · 13/04/2025 00:21

SwingTheMonkey · 12/04/2025 21:15

No idea what Sonia Fowler has to do with anything. How bizarre.

It absolutely is to do with her. We aren’t simply vessels for producing offspring.
I wasn’t interested in ‘showing off’ anything. Just getting back to normal life. My babies were perfectly fine accompanying me. I never felt the need to convalesce.

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Sense of humour? @ Sonia fowler 🤷🏼‍♀️

Unwelcoming · 13/04/2025 00:17

SwingTheMonkey · 12/04/2025 21:18

I’m really struggling to understand your posts tbh. Are you in the pub?!

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Not with a newborn though 😝

JustAnotherManicMomday · 12/04/2025 23:48

YABU. When I had my second I left the hospital at mid day by 1pm I had been home, picked up the pram, dropped my eldest at nursery and was in argos where I worked at the time, buying a parasol. It was only later that I realised we already had one but I was on auto pilot after no sleep. If she feels up to it then good for her.

SouthLondonMum22 · 12/04/2025 23:45

SwingTheMonkey · 12/04/2025 23:17

Urgh. What if that postpartum woman didn’t want to spend a few weeks resting and being looked after?!

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Exactly.

No thanks.

DeskJotter · 12/04/2025 23:21

Allseeingallknowing · 12/04/2025 23:17

No, that’s just how you see it, so who’s being judgemental?

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Still you.

Allseeingallknowing · 12/04/2025 23:17

SwingTheMonkey · 12/04/2025 23:13

But that’s not what you’ve been saying! You’ve been judgmental as fuck!

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No, that’s just how you see it, so who’s being judgemental?

SwingTheMonkey · 12/04/2025 23:17

ChocolateAddictAlways · 12/04/2025 22:59

I mean I didn’t get out of hospital until day 6 post partum with my first so frankly this sounds hellish to me 🤣 but I appreciate this young mum felt well enough to be out.

I am old fashioned and I think women should spend a few weeks post partum just resting, being looked after by family if possible, even after an ‘easy’ delivery. And keeping newborn babies away from too many people. But to each their own I guess!

Urgh. What if that postpartum woman didn’t want to spend a few weeks resting and being looked after?!

Fontofallknowledge23 · 12/04/2025 23:15

To be fair this probably boils down to the simple fact a child gave birth to a child. If I’d had a baby at 17 I’d have done exactly the same. I would have wanted to make a point to myself ( and the world) that I was still the same person and this baby wasn’t going to change anything. I just hope this young mother has plenty of support around her. My cousin had a baby at 18 and was blessed to have a lot of support. It changes everything. All these comments from much older mothers about going for a meal at the pub with their husbands really aren’t getting it. I just wish this young mother well and OP too who is showing some concern in the circumstances.

Rachie1973 · 12/04/2025 23:14

I went all over the place with my newborns. Even my winter born ones. Just wrapped them up snug and off I went. Pubs, cafes, shops, wherever I chose to go!

I also did the same with my foster babies!

SwingTheMonkey · 12/04/2025 23:13

Allseeingallknowing · 12/04/2025 22:46

They can do what they like and that’s fine- same as I do what I like! We’ve all got different opinions. That’s why Mumsnet exists!

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But that’s not what you’ve been saying! You’ve been judgmental as fuck!

Rachie1973 · 12/04/2025 23:09

Livingbytheocean · 10/04/2025 07:31

It’s just rough.
It could be the nicest pub in the world, it’s still not a place for a newborn baby that has only just arrived.

It’s just unthinkable to me, no wonder social services are overwhelmed if people genuinely think this is acceptable parenting, there is no thought whatsoever of the comfort and well being of the baby, that’s the issue I have with it.

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Social services would laugh in your face if you raised this as a concern!

JMSA · 12/04/2025 23:03

Aww, it’s going to be an angsty time for a 17 year old who has just become a mother. Being around others probably helps her to feel less alone.

ChocolateAddictAlways · 12/04/2025 22:59

I mean I didn’t get out of hospital until day 6 post partum with my first so frankly this sounds hellish to me 🤣 but I appreciate this young mum felt well enough to be out.

I am old fashioned and I think women should spend a few weeks post partum just resting, being looked after by family if possible, even after an ‘easy’ delivery. And keeping newborn babies away from too many people. But to each their own I guess!

Gogogo12345 · 12/04/2025 22:54

Unexpectedlysinglemum · 12/04/2025 22:11

In summer it's ok if windows open, in winter I wouldn't want new baby or mum to be exposed to all those germs

What germs though? Apart from the family members present ( who could've brought their germs to her house) it's unlikely there would be loads of other people in close proximity

Gogogo12345 · 12/04/2025 22:53

doreeen · 12/04/2025 21:58

@Unwelcoming that was me who referred to them as like little potatoes 😅

I once read ‘don’t worry about waiting to see what name suits your baby because all newborns resemble baked potatoes’ and it just stuck with me because it’s accurate.

My babies were like sleeping potatoes in the first couple of weeks- they just slept 80% of the day through everything and anything, had zero awareness or care of their surroundings as long as I was there. A coffee shop to them was the same as being at home or elsewhere. I remember being able to go for a lunch and baby would just sleep in the carrycot in their pram for the whole thing. That phase didn’t last long so it’s worth making the most of 😁

Also to add I didn’t say babies aren’t cute. they are adorable potatoes 🥔

Lol my DGS had the nickname Spud due to this

Allseeingallknowing · 12/04/2025 22:46

SwingTheMonkey · 12/04/2025 22:17

Jesus 🤦🏻‍♀️ And that’s ok. Just the same as it’s ok for other mums (who love their babies equally) to think they look like potatoes and are happy to exit the precious postpartum family bubble to go to the shops/school run/cafe/pub. I honestly think you must be trolling now because I struggle to believe there’s a mother alive who doesn’t realise that other women do things differently to them and that’s perfectly ok.

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They can do what they like and that’s fine- same as I do what I like! We’ve all got different opinions. That’s why Mumsnet exists!

SwingTheMonkey · 12/04/2025 22:17

Allseeingallknowing · 12/04/2025 21:55

Potatoes? Certainly never thought of mine that way!

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Jesus 🤦🏻‍♀️ And that’s ok. Just the same as it’s ok for other mums (who love their babies equally) to think they look like potatoes and are happy to exit the precious postpartum family bubble to go to the shops/school run/cafe/pub. I honestly think you must be trolling now because I struggle to believe there’s a mother alive who doesn’t realise that other women do things differently to them and that’s perfectly ok.

Unexpectedlysinglemum · 12/04/2025 22:11

Remember mum is so young too she probably bounced back to health

Unexpectedlysinglemum · 12/04/2025 22:11

In summer it's ok if windows open, in winter I wouldn't want new baby or mum to be exposed to all those germs