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To think you don’t get out of paying the bill because you don’t drink?

458 replies

ThatHardyWaspAgain · 09/04/2025 19:58

I’m sure this has been done many times before by people in similar scenarios.

I went out for a bit of lunch with two friend’s and one of them brought another friend along that I’ve never met but was nice enough.

However, when it came to the bill, she said ‘’Can we please calculate it all with the alcohol you’ve had separately paid for? Because I only had classical cokes’’

So, we did as she asked. Added up everything but removed the drinks. So 3 of us paid for our drinks in a split, and then did another split for the rest with her and her food and classical colas.

The annoying bit is, she had 3 of them. And they weren’t really much different in price to most of our alcohol.

We all had the same roast and mango cheesecake.

I wouldn’t mind but she kept insisting we all had a dessert so she didn’t feel alone in having one. We’re adults after all but it is a bit annoying

Separate thread to come to see if I would be U to tell my friend not to bring her along again

She also didn’t tip.

OP posts:
BySassyGreenPanda · 19/08/2025 11:01

tillytoodles1 · 09/04/2025 20:34

I agree. On holiday a few years ago, three of the four drank a couple of pints, then maybe two bottles of wine between them, while I drank water or coke. They always split the bill and wondered why I complained once or twice. They were familycand it made it a bit awkward.

Yes, I've had this with a group I'd been away with a couple of times. I was often paying double the cost of what I'd had. I was really sick of it.

Once I raised it of course, the atmosphere changed and after that trip I never heard from them again.

It's a shame that some people expect to get away with this shit. It's always the ones taking the piss that cause the atmosphere when they get called out. It's not fair and they know it. I couldn't do that.

Dontcallmescarface · 26/04/2025 13:06

Chiseltip · 24/04/2025 22:35

No. People with your attitude were THE worst, most entitled customers I served when I worked in restaurants as a student.

A tip is for extra vare and attention, not the level of service minimum wage gets you.

What "extra care and attention" requires a tip though?

XxSideshowAuntSallyx · 26/04/2025 12:26

If i don't drink then the drinks get done separately or we split the food then work out the drinks. I often drive so don't end up drinking.

Gogogo12345 · 26/04/2025 12:15

Chiseltip · 24/04/2025 22:35

No. People with your attitude were THE worst, most entitled customers I served when I worked in restaurants as a student.

A tip is for extra vare and attention, not the level of service minimum wage gets you.

What's my attitude?

taxguru · 25/04/2025 18:48

LyingWitchInTheWardrobe · 25/04/2025 15:01

The job is worth what you agreed to do it for. That's between you and your employer, not the customer. There is a limit to what you can do to obtain more money but an expectation of tipping isn't it now that NMW has levelled the playing field.

Your attitude is why there is massive entitlement across the serving staff in the hospitality industry; not all, but very many. Care and attention is the bare minimum.

Everything that latetothefishing has said covers it.

Nail on the head.

LyingWitchInTheWardrobe · 25/04/2025 15:01

Chiseltip · 24/04/2025 22:35

No. People with your attitude were THE worst, most entitled customers I served when I worked in restaurants as a student.

A tip is for extra vare and attention, not the level of service minimum wage gets you.

The job is worth what you agreed to do it for. That's between you and your employer, not the customer. There is a limit to what you can do to obtain more money but an expectation of tipping isn't it now that NMW has levelled the playing field.

Your attitude is why there is massive entitlement across the serving staff in the hospitality industry; not all, but very many. Care and attention is the bare minimum.

Everything that latetothefishing has said covers it.

latetothefisting · 25/04/2025 13:36

Chiseltip · 24/04/2025 22:35

No. People with your attitude were THE worst, most entitled customers I served when I worked in restaurants as a student.

A tip is for extra vare and attention, not the level of service minimum wage gets you.

the absolute basic "level of service" should still be polite, correct (as in people get exactly what they ordered), and fast (within the extent of the server's control).

tbh as long as servers meet that, I don't really care if they then go "above and beyond" in enthusiastic chatting or being really friendly - I'm eating out with my actual friends, I don't need a waiter to pretend to like me for extra money, I just need them to get the correct food from the kitchen to my table , i.e. their literal job.

If you can't even meet that minimum level then you shouldn't be doing the job.

apart from anything else, if you think people need to tip well to get good service, how does that even work logically given you don't tip until after you've already received the service? Are you somehow psychically able to sense who will be a good tipper and treat them accordingly?

and how about in jobs where they don't get tips but still work for minimum wage? Or do you just accept that shop staff, HCA's, TA's, etc don't need to meet the bare minimum standard of professionalism because they aren't getting anything extra out of it?

Newnameforaday88 · 24/04/2025 22:44

Mental image of the classical cokes performing swan lake on the table.

Chiseltip · 24/04/2025 22:35

Gogogo12345 · 18/04/2025 16:10

So someone who earns minimum wage and does their job properly goes out to eat in a restaurant where they are expected to pay someone ( who earns the same as them) extra money to do THIER job properly? Crazy

No. People with your attitude were THE worst, most entitled customers I served when I worked in restaurants as a student.

A tip is for extra vare and attention, not the level of service minimum wage gets you.

LyingWitchInTheWardrobe · 21/04/2025 18:12

Cherrytree86 · 21/04/2025 15:23

@LyingWitchInTheWardrobe

im just speculating as to what on earth OP’s friends thought process was to try to get out of paying for her three cokes!

I'm still not getting it, sorry. What's virtuous/superior about drinking cokes or not drinking them? Regardless of who pays for them?

My interpretation of your first post was that people who don't drink alcohol are behaving as they're virtuous and superior. That as why I posted. I don't drink alcohol, I don't like it. It doesn't make me virtuous or superior.

Cherrytree86 · 21/04/2025 15:23

LyingWitchInTheWardrobe · 20/04/2025 20:58

Then what's the 'virtuous and superior' about? Your post doesn't make sense if that's what you actually meant.

@LyingWitchInTheWardrobe

im just speculating as to what on earth OP’s friends thought process was to try to get out of paying for her three cokes!

LyingWitchInTheWardrobe · 20/04/2025 20:58

Cherrytree86 · 20/04/2025 15:18

@LyingWitchInTheWardrobe

i don’t give a shit when I’m out with friends if they don’t drink alcohol. If they neck three cokes and expect the drinkers to pay then I do give a shit! Big difference.

Then what's the 'virtuous and superior' about? Your post doesn't make sense if that's what you actually meant.

alsohappenedoverhere · 20/04/2025 19:48

Missing the point of the thread but who could drink 3 cokes with food. Blergh.

Cherrytree86 · 20/04/2025 15:18

LyingWitchInTheWardrobe · 20/04/2025 12:14

Anybody who refers to a non-drinker as being 'virtuous and superior' obviously has a problem with their own alcohol consumption.

Nobody gives a hoot what you drink, live and let live.

@LyingWitchInTheWardrobe

i don’t give a shit when I’m out with friends if they don’t drink alcohol. If they neck three cokes and expect the drinkers to pay then I do give a shit! Big difference.

taxguru · 20/04/2025 14:36

Cherrytree86 · 20/04/2025 09:53

I think some people feel so virtuous and superior if they don’t drink alcohol that they genuinely expect others should subsidise whatever non-alcoholic drinks they indulge in (and 3 full sugar cokes is deffo indulgent!)

Sounds like you have "issues" about those who chose not to drink alcohol. Nothing "virtuous and superior" about not actually liking the taste of alcoholic drinks.

LyingWitchInTheWardrobe · 20/04/2025 12:14

Cherrytree86 · 20/04/2025 09:53

I think some people feel so virtuous and superior if they don’t drink alcohol that they genuinely expect others should subsidise whatever non-alcoholic drinks they indulge in (and 3 full sugar cokes is deffo indulgent!)

Anybody who refers to a non-drinker as being 'virtuous and superior' obviously has a problem with their own alcohol consumption.

Nobody gives a hoot what you drink, live and let live.

Oblomov25 · 20/04/2025 10:03

Split it to include her 3 cokes.

Cherrytree86 · 20/04/2025 09:53

I think some people feel so virtuous and superior if they don’t drink alcohol that they genuinely expect others should subsidise whatever non-alcoholic drinks they indulge in (and 3 full sugar cokes is deffo indulgent!)

JohnAmendAll · 20/04/2025 09:24

I don't know if you are BU or not, but I do know she wouldn't be invited again.

Cherrytree86 · 20/04/2025 09:20

I can’t believe she had three cokes over lunch…that’s soooooo many calories!

Idratherbepaddleboarding · 18/04/2025 16:32

This reply has been withdrawn

Post withdrawn at author's request

Gogogo12345 · 18/04/2025 16:14

Jfybcderk · 10/04/2025 05:38

People in retail don’t work until 11pm or 1am at the weekend.

People who work in 24 hours garages do. As well as people in fast food restaurants. And shelf stackers in the supermarket. None of them get tips

SallyWD · 18/04/2025 16:14

It's really weird that you didn't split the bill so she paid for her her cokes.

Gogogo12345 · 18/04/2025 16:10

Chiseltip · 10/04/2025 10:20

Tipping exists in certain industries for a reason.

Minimum wage means minimum effort. Fine if you're just stacking shelves at Asda. But people don't go to restaurants because they are hungry, they go there for the experience. Having a shelf stacker speak to you in a rude, sullen manner when you asked where the Beans are is understandable. But when you're paying £100 or more for meal in a restaurant, you expect more than minimum effort from the staff. A rude server can ruin the atmosphere. So tipping is an incentive for the restaurant staff to provide a level of service over and above what minimum wage would imply.

So someone who earns minimum wage and does their job properly goes out to eat in a restaurant where they are expected to pay someone ( who earns the same as them) extra money to do THIER job properly? Crazy

Gogogo12345 · 18/04/2025 16:01

Sunbeam01 · 09/04/2025 22:21

@Sofiewoo Yes you can however this means either splitting the bill or everyone manually working out the cost of what they've had to eat and drink. There's often awkward conversations. It's tiresome. It can kill the atmosphere. Not always - very much depends on the company.

It would be much better if it was seamless with no additional 'touch points' or considerations.

Or you can just ask for seperate bills at the start before ordering. Job done, no counting no discussions

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