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Original poster

Email from my ex husband...

458 replies

Arlanymor · 09/04/2025 17:12

Dear Arlanymor, sincerely hope you are well. I need to know the date of our wedding because I have to fill in an X form. Are you able to remember please? Best regards, Ex Wanker.

Sent to my WORK email. Which means he had to look it up online.

I divorced him for adultery nearly two decades ago now. Also the clue is in 'our wedding' isn't it? You were there on the day dickhead. We haven't been in contact since 2019 when he kept coming up as having looked at my profile on LinkedIn and I got in touch via their messenger to ask him not to.

This has got me so angry. "Oh Arlanymor - do me a favour please? Even though I am a cheating arsehole and should be able to fill in forms without bothering/the assistance of my ex-wife." The date is on the decree absolute you absolute toilet goblin.

FUMING. FUMING. FUMING.

OP posts:
BunnyLake · 10/04/2025 07:09

nessiesnotreal · 09/04/2025 17:22

I divorced my XH 2 decades ago for the same reason and have not spoken to him since. If he emailed me with this info I would just reply with the date. But I have moved so far past all the crap he put me through and risen above it that it wouldn't bother me in the slightest to reply with the info he has asked for.

Not replying would make me feel like he thinks he somehow still bothers me after all these years, which he doesn't. I have no interest in being petty or punishing him for his past bullshit because he is that insignificant to me. But that's just me and how I would look at it.

This is where I am with my ex. It’s indifference and it’s a good place to be.

MaggieBsBoat · 10/04/2025 06:58

My EX did the same after a couple of decades to ask me the date and for a copy of the decree absolute as he “felt it was time to move on”. I told him he should
contact the registrar as I don’t have any paperwork to do with such a violent disgusting human as I had moved on many years ago. Twat.

Someonelookedatmypostinghistorysoichanged · 10/04/2025 06:56

Him the date was April 1st

Someonelookedatmypostinghistorysoichanged · 10/04/2025 06:54

He knows the date…. He’s giving you an update on his life. Probably hoping for a chit chat

LyingSmilingInTheDark · 10/04/2025 06:49

SpringIsSpringing25 · 09/04/2025 22:38

Nope.

For her OWN good. It would have taken two seconds and it would've all been over, instead of being so wound up by it she started a thread and is now going to spend the evening night contemplating what her response will be or if she will even respond that's a lot of time thinking about him in the situation when she could've simply resolved it in two seconds

Show quote history

Nonsense. Why not achieve the same result by deleting, ignoring and setting up a rule to auto-delete his future emails?

THAT is for her own good.

Let's please, please stop pandering to useless, lazy men toilet goblins. It just encourages them.

ColourlessGreenIdeasSleepFuriously · 10/04/2025 06:39

SpringIsSpringing25 · 09/04/2025 22:38

Nope.

For her OWN good. It would have taken two seconds and it would've all been over, instead of being so wound up by it she started a thread and is now going to spend the evening night contemplating what her response will be or if she will even respond that's a lot of time thinking about him in the situation when she could've simply resolved it in two seconds

Show quote history

Fuck that shit. Binning the email would have done th same job and been much more satisfying all round.

MarxistMags · 09/04/2025 23:07

Yes ! Brilliant answer.

Mumof2girls2121 · 09/04/2025 23:04

Give him the wrong date

BrightYellowDaffodil · 09/04/2025 22:41

Dear Bog Goblin,

Thank you for your email. Unfortunately I have erased the raging binfire that was our marriage from my memory and I am therefore unable to help you with your query.

With best wishes and a fervent desire for you not to contact me again with your tedious life admin,

Arlanymor.

SpringIsSpringing25 · 09/04/2025 22:38

diddl · 09/04/2025 17:58

Why do posters think Op should tell him?

To "be kind"?

Nope.

For her OWN good. It would have taken two seconds and it would've all been over, instead of being so wound up by it she started a thread and is now going to spend the evening night contemplating what her response will be or if she will even respond that's a lot of time thinking about him in the situation when she could've simply resolved it in two seconds

ThinWomansBrain · 09/04/2025 22:26

Aliflowers · 09/04/2025 17:18

I’d reply I can’t remember.

I can’t remember - it's quite normal for the mind to block the detail of traumatic events

k1233 · 09/04/2025 22:25

I'd be super vague, if I replied at all. After all, it's very easy to lose emails in a busy inbox. If I felt like replying it would be a one liner, no pleasantries, "it was so long ago I can't remember"

HarpieDuJour · 09/04/2025 22:22

If his job requires vetting of even his former wife, then surely he has the ability to work out how Google works and find the process for getting a copy if the documents he needs?
Do you think this is a stealth brag about a big promotion?

Fraaances · 09/04/2025 22:22

Let him spend his money to apply for a copy through the courts. Or births, deaths & marriages. Ignore him and have a story to tell your friends… “You’ll never believe what the Toilet Goblin just did….”

Iamnotalemming · 09/04/2025 22:21

"I think it was 1 April wasn't it? Can't remember the year though."

clickyteeclick · 09/04/2025 22:20

I encourage you to put a completely made up date … in 1917

LadyRoughDiamond · 09/04/2025 22:18

Perhaps just reply with ‘Unsubscribe’, then block.

ToffeePennie · 09/04/2025 22:14

Delete and block. He is *puke incarnate

Matildahoney · 09/04/2025 22:13

Delete, if he gets in contact another way, claim it must have gone into your junk email

StressedLP1 · 09/04/2025 22:12

“No I can’t remember either. Hope you get it sorted”

then block the cheeky fucker.

Eddielizzard · 09/04/2025 22:07

I wouldn't respond. Make him work a bit harder for it.

He wants to get in contact. Of course he knows. He can't resist a little needle. Ignore it.

Ellie56 · 09/04/2025 21:57

Don't bother helping the toilet goblin. He can get off his arse and look it up himself, the lazy git.

Just send him an Out of Office notice then delete.

Discobooloo · 09/04/2025 21:51

Ignore him and set up a mailbox rule that automatically moves anything from his email address to your deletes folder (and marks as read so you don't see an unread email in your this folder)

JorgyPorgy · 09/04/2025 21:50

Sounds like he wanted an excuse to contact you OP. Probably best to ignore & block .

crockofshite · 09/04/2025 21:49

You could reply .....

Oh god, don't tell me we were actually married!

Then block.

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