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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

What would you HONESTLY do in this situation?

559 replies

Friends1996 · 09/04/2025 12:24

Say you ordered a few items from a big online shop (clothing), then successfully cancelled the order, and was refunded.

A few days later, you ordered a single item of clothing from the same place. Today that item was delivered, however they had also sent the items you had cancelled and was refunded for (probably around £120 worth of stuff).

Would you contact them about it or would you keep quiet, see if they emailed you about it and if you didn’t hear anything say 3-4 weeks down the line, just keep the items as normal? This is a place you regularly order from, spending between £300-400 a month.

What would you HONESTLY do?

OP posts:
Boreded · 09/04/2025 14:45

PashaMinaMio · 09/04/2025 12:35

It would be theft.
Why are you even asking us?

Because OP wants to be told that it is ok to steal…

Rainingalldayonmyhead · 09/04/2025 14:45

CheeseFiend40 · 09/04/2025 14:44

@Friends1996 I would definitely keep them. I’ve had a similar thing happen a couple of times and I kept the items. I have no problem with it and saw it as a happy little bonus in life, we don’t often get that.

So effectively you are okay with stealing?

CheeseFiend40 · 09/04/2025 14:44

@Friends1996 I would definitely keep them. I’ve had a similar thing happen a couple of times and I kept the items. I have no problem with it and saw it as a happy little bonus in life, we don’t often get that.

Rainingalldayonmyhead · 09/04/2025 14:44

Do the right thing and contact them - they can decide if they want the clothes back or not.

Integrity is doing the right thing, even when no one is watching.

ThatTipsyMintMember · 09/04/2025 14:43

We contacted the company's - most expensive was when they dropped a huge box of crockery. They told us and reschulded delivery but then delivered clearly dropped box and replacement. They said to keep both - luckily for us dropped box was so well packed it had no breakages else we'd have had a lot of broken crockery to get rid of.

Only time I haven't did not feel I'd done anything wrong.

November ordered skirt for DD for chirstmas - doesn't come in expected time did do what they ask and check round and with neighbours - nothing - they re-sent. It was via Amazan. End of January neighbour son comes round - postman had delivered our parcel to her so assumed it was for him and he works away and shoved it in his room and forgot about it. He'd come back and saw it and brought it round. A bit late.

I might have tried to tell company via Amazon but had just had problems with Amazon screwing up an order and sending completly wrong thing and to my annoyance had taken time and money and my inconvenience to sort. I couldn't face trying to sort it - and frankly it had been lost in the post and was delivered way to late. So kept it and gave it to DD as extra.

I think here - its clear what's happened so I would get in touch and explain. I also wouldn't want to avoid risk of re-charged if I didn't.

WavyRavey · 09/04/2025 14:39

I'd keep everything 😂

Dinoswearunderpants · 09/04/2025 14:39

Honestly I'd just keep the items. I wouldn't try and return any items. Simple enjoy them and hope it's ok.

vivainsomnia · 09/04/2025 14:39

I like to believe that I'm a good person. Being honest is part of bei g a good person. Picking and choosing to be good when it suits is not being a good person. It is particularly important to me being a mother. I would hate the hypocrisy of pretending to raise them to be good people whilst being conveniently dishonest myself. It's happened to me, a situation where I was very inconvenienced. When they mistakingly reimbursed me twice, I didn't cash the second cheque even though I was so scrapped for cash then.

itsgettingweird · 09/04/2025 14:38

If you intended to re order I’d be honest. They’ll either let you keep at their cost or you can pay for them or return them if they don't offer this.

Id absolutely want to keep quiet but I just can’t!

Wexone · 09/04/2025 14:37

Streetsofkenny · 09/04/2025 14:18

I've also just spotted on the end of your post that you regularly spend £300-£400 on this website - is this just on clothes?! 😮Per month??? 😮So you don't even have the excuse of being short of a few bob. I'm not sure how you are justifying this to yourself, but you need to at least offer to do the right thing.

I agree - i used to be like the OP - Fast fashion companies dream. Then realised that i was shopping and not wearing anything - it was all crammed in my wardrobe. Plus not very good quality. So i cut back big time, my money now goes into savings and holidays, plus moved into a nice house. If you are doing this every month its peak consumerism, i am all for spending your money on what you want but have a good look and see if you really need it. Consumers like the OP are what Shein etc aim at not the people who dont have 300e a month to spend on clothes

SDTGisAnEvilWolefGenius · 09/04/2025 14:36

@TessTickle0 - you really think honesty is ‘bleurgh’??

Would you still be supporting dishonesty/theft if it was your possessions that were stolen? Because if honesty is ‘bleurgh’, theft and dishonesty must be perfectly OK, even if you are the victim!

Throwitaway12345 · 09/04/2025 14:35

This actually did happen to me with Amazon (not clothes). I kept the items and never thought about it again until this thread!

Hoppinggreen · 09/04/2025 14:34

DuckieDodgyHedgyPiggy · 09/04/2025 14:32

Civilisation relies on people obeying the rules, otherwise you get anarchy. Think what would happen if the rules of the road went out the window. This situation is no different really - society works when everyone behaves for the common good. I'd like to think I could leave my jacket on a cafe chair without you deciding it's quite nice and you'll take it.

I think some people on this thread would have a look at you first and if it looked like you could afford to replace your jacket then they WOULD actually steal it.

muddyford · 09/04/2025 14:34

I'd tell them.

Livelovebehappy · 09/04/2025 14:34

TessTickle0 · 09/04/2025 14:24

Everyone being so righteous and honest! Bleurgh.
I would keep them and I think you should too, 😀very rare in life for things Like this to happen so take them when you can!

Really hope you don’t have kids. If you do, not a great role model are you to teach your kids that it’s okay to steal……..

Throwitaway12345 · 09/04/2025 14:34

Say nothing. Keep them for myself or sell them.

Tvp123 · 09/04/2025 14:33

Tell them. If you don't it's still morally corrupt even if it isn't legally theft.

Zeitumschaltung · 09/04/2025 14:33

This has happened to me and I have contacted the company. Sometimes they have told me to keep the things regardless.

DuckieDodgyHedgyPiggy · 09/04/2025 14:32

TessTickle0 · 09/04/2025 14:24

Everyone being so righteous and honest! Bleurgh.
I would keep them and I think you should too, 😀very rare in life for things Like this to happen so take them when you can!

Civilisation relies on people obeying the rules, otherwise you get anarchy. Think what would happen if the rules of the road went out the window. This situation is no different really - society works when everyone behaves for the common good. I'd like to think I could leave my jacket on a cafe chair without you deciding it's quite nice and you'll take it.

DevonCreamTeaPlease · 09/04/2025 14:32

Dotjones · 09/04/2025 14:30

I'd contact them and ask them to arrange for them to be collected, giving them a couple of dates/times I know I'd be in.

It would be different if they were unsolicited goods because the law is different in those circumstances. I probably wouldn't bother contacting them or maybe a maximum of one email. In the OP's circumstances though this is difference because it's a clear error based on an order they'd made.

It will be on record that she received the clothes.

Livelovebehappy · 09/04/2025 14:32

How embarrassed will you be if this is raised in a couple of weeks time when they might realise what’s happened, and get in touch with you? You’d have to admit to being dishonest, and if I was the company I’d put you on a black list and not let you order again. It’s theft, whatever way you try to position it.

Higglepigglewiggle · 09/04/2025 14:32

Big company - I would def keep it!

Mumof2heroes · 09/04/2025 14:31

Friends1996 · 09/04/2025 12:28

Why would you donate to charity when it’s clothing you wanted and they said to keep them? That’s a bit bizarre

But you didn't want them...you returned them for a refund 🤷🏼‍♀️

Dotjones · 09/04/2025 14:30

I'd contact them and ask them to arrange for them to be collected, giving them a couple of dates/times I know I'd be in.

It would be different if they were unsolicited goods because the law is different in those circumstances. I probably wouldn't bother contacting them or maybe a maximum of one email. In the OP's circumstances though this is difference because it's a clear error based on an order they'd made.

Flutterbees · 09/04/2025 14:30

TessTickle0 · 09/04/2025 14:24

Everyone being so righteous and honest! Bleurgh.
I would keep them and I think you should too, 😀very rare in life for things Like this to happen so take them when you can!

Yeah, how dare we be so righteous and honest, so horrible of us.