I'll start by acknowledging that my MIL often irritates me and I think I irritate her too. We have a generally good relationship but there is sometimes an undercurrent of passive aggressiveness, with her sometimes making outright hurtful or critical comments, which she seems to make to derive pleasure in upsetting people.
We had MIL and FIL over for dinner along with SIL and her kids. I had made spring rolls in rice paper wrappers.
I'm making these rolls and my MIL says with a smirk, 'Oh, whenever I see these they make me think of ... whatever I think of....'
I knew immediately she was trying to refer to condoms but I didn't acknowledge it as I didn't want to be crass and put people off what I was making. I was a bit annoyed because I was working hard on a nice dinner for them.
Because no one picked up on her comment she reiterated, 'These always reminds me of condoms.'
I replied with, 'Oh please don't say that, it'll put everyone off their dinner!'
She said, 'Sorry if I upset you!'
I replied that I wasn't upset, only that I would rather she not say that as it doesn't make the food very appealing when thinking of that. She responded that she didn't mean to upset me and I said again that I wasn't upset and that she didn't have to eat the rolls if she didn't want to. She said that she would enjoy them and that was the end of the discussion.
I thought she was very rude to mention this and press the issue while I was preparing dinner. But my husband thinks I'm being a bit sensitive.