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Upset about weight 37 yo

62 replies

Bendylendy · 06/04/2025 18:27

I’m a 37 year old mum of 2. I used to be a size 8 and now am a 14. It’s got me down. I am quite short and hubby is much taller and lankier so it feels weird when you look at us and I am quite conscious about it. Anyone else in same boat?

OP posts:
Bendylendy · 06/04/2025 20:59

ICanTellYouMissMe · 06/04/2025 20:36

I was exactly like this when my kids were little and I had no time to to myself to exercise or really just care for myself by making healthy meals etc.

Now they’re teens and I have my time and energy back, and I’ve lost five stone because I had the focus to do it.

my husband is also tall and skinny and I hated how weird we looked together!

Yes it does look weird and makes me feel more self conscious

OP posts:
Ilovecakey · 06/04/2025 20:52

TorroFerney · 06/04/2025 20:23

She didn’t say op was morbidly obese, read it again , before is the word.

Yes but implying she will soon be morbidly obese soon! Or she could just stay slightly overweight and stay at a 14! Not every overweight person becomes morbidly obese! How stupid!

PassMeTheCookies · 06/04/2025 20:40

I’m with you, OP. Whilst I wasn’t super skinny before kids, I was slimmer and had more time for the gym etc.

My weight is getting me down. Earlier this week, I was so close to ordering the jabs, then I saw a story that frightened me. I’ve been calorie counting since Jan and haven’t dropped any weight (3lb), but I had to be really honest with myself and see what was undoing my hard work - it was the weekends out with the kids and thinking I could relax on calories after sticking to it for 5 days, and I was just undoing my hard work.

This week, I’ve stuck to my calories, even at the weekend, and I’ve exercised each day. Some days, it’s only been a 15 minute workout on YouTube, but I feel better for it. I’m hoping to see a good loss on the scales this week to prove to myself that weekends were where I was going wrong.

It’s hard at first to prioritise yourself a little bit when you have little ones, but that time spent on meal prepping, food shopping etc pays off and is worth the time investment and commitment if it makes you feel better about yourself xx

ICanTellYouMissMe · 06/04/2025 20:36

I was exactly like this when my kids were little and I had no time to to myself to exercise or really just care for myself by making healthy meals etc.

Now they’re teens and I have my time and energy back, and I’ve lost five stone because I had the focus to do it.

my husband is also tall and skinny and I hated how weird we looked together!

Simplynotsimple · 06/04/2025 20:34

Bendylendy · 06/04/2025 19:30

Insta or watching porn!? What’s the difference?

Both are gross, but he’s your husband and they’re your boundaries.

As for the weight, it could be a mixture of things. It unfortunately does take little to put weight on as a 37 year old woman post kids. I’m almost certainly peri menopausal at the same age, my bmi is 26 and finding it very difficult to shift the last half stone to get it to at least the ‘normal weight’ level. If I was ‘serious’ about it, I’d completely cut out alcohol and my weekly treats but that would make me miserable so I’d sooner be slightly overweight.

TorroFerney · 06/04/2025 20:23

Ilovecakey · 06/04/2025 19:15

How horrible! A size 14 is hardly morbidly obese!

She didn’t say op was morbidly obese, read it again , before is the word.

Difficile · 06/04/2025 20:10

37 soon and gone up to an 18 from a 12/14 following a singleton and twin pregnancy since 2021.

Not long started Weight Watchers and have lost 25lbs. It came off very quickly to begin with and now it's slowing down to a more 'normal' weekly weight loss.

It sucks, but we'll get there.

FlyingWithBabyLongHaul · 06/04/2025 20:06

OP, what's your plan to lose the weight?

Bendylendy · 06/04/2025 20:04

Hazelspostoffice · 06/04/2025 19:49

Also 37 and a size 16. Used to be 10-12 before kids. I want to lose 2 stone.

started 2 weeks ago having a small protein brekkie (Greek yoghurt etc), medium whole food lunch (eggs etc) and a normal dinner. No snacking and no treats.

Have lost 5 lb in two weeks and feeling motivated. It is so hard to change habits though.

Worth having your thyroid checked too as this can cause weight gain,

Thyroid is fine as I had it checked.

OP posts:
Hazelspostoffice · 06/04/2025 19:49

Also 37 and a size 16. Used to be 10-12 before kids. I want to lose 2 stone.

started 2 weeks ago having a small protein brekkie (Greek yoghurt etc), medium whole food lunch (eggs etc) and a normal dinner. No snacking and no treats.

Have lost 5 lb in two weeks and feeling motivated. It is so hard to change habits though.

Worth having your thyroid checked too as this can cause weight gain,

adviceneeded1990 · 06/04/2025 19:36

PrettayGood · 06/04/2025 18:31

Of course it’s not genetic!

Do something about it before you’re morbidly obese.

She’s a size 14, get a grip!

Bendylendy · 06/04/2025 19:33

Caffeineneedednow · 06/04/2025 19:27

What's your BMI OP?

Clothes size vary massively. If you are obese ( which if your very short you may be) then you may qualify for the jabs.

There is a genetic aspect to obesity but it is not a definitive indicator that you will become obese.

That’s what’s unfair too. Being short!

OP posts:
Bendylendy · 06/04/2025 19:30

Didimum · 06/04/2025 19:28

Yikes. That’s awful.

Insta or watching porn!? What’s the difference?

OP posts:
Didimum · 06/04/2025 19:28

Bendylendy · 06/04/2025 18:47

Also a bit paranoid about my hubby as I’m sure he follows scantily clad women on insta who might be curvy but not fat!

Yikes. That’s awful.

Caffeineneedednow · 06/04/2025 19:27

What's your BMI OP?

Clothes size vary massively. If you are obese ( which if your very short you may be) then you may qualify for the jabs.

There is a genetic aspect to obesity but it is not a definitive indicator that you will become obese.

ReggaetonLente · 06/04/2025 19:25

I get it OP. I’ve slowly crept up to a 14, the weight was just so hard to shift after baby number 2. I have in fact added to it!

It just seems so hard to lose, the stuff I did pre-30 to lose weight (up my exercise, smaller portions) seems to make no difference now at 34.

blueshoes · 06/04/2025 19:19

Bendylendy · 06/04/2025 18:53

Maybe a lot of men do this but I wouldn’t know if it’s ok or normal or not.

I don't think it is ok or normal. He sounds awful.

AlwaysCoffee25 · 06/04/2025 19:18

Me too op. I’ve always been very active and a size 8-10.

I actually lost the weight after both my pregnancies within 6m but it’s crept up again. I’m now 11.5st which is my heaviest. I work out 4-6x a week and am strong and fit but a size 14 now on the bottom which is getting me down.

My husband goes to the gym a lot like me but is much less driven to binge eat. I have BED which is my issue.

Ilovecakey · 06/04/2025 19:15

PrettayGood · 06/04/2025 18:31

Of course it’s not genetic!

Do something about it before you’re morbidly obese.

How horrible! A size 14 is hardly morbidly obese!

violincelloviola · 06/04/2025 19:10

Bendylendy · 06/04/2025 19:06

It’s big compared to an 8

Well, yes. So do something about it now rather than wait until you’re a size 22, which is big compared to a 14.

Bendylendy · 06/04/2025 19:06

violincelloviola · 06/04/2025 18:47

It will be the snacking and not exercising, not your genes.

Size 14 isn’t that big and it won’t take you long to lose the weight. Do something about it now and in a few months you could easily be a size 10 again. Don’t just ignore it, the risk is you keep gaining and then it becomes a harder problem to fix.

Edited

It’s big compared to an 8

OP posts:
Bendylendy · 06/04/2025 18:56

girljulian · 06/04/2025 18:51

This makes me feel better about never having been a size 8 even as a teen. When I was a size 12 then I felt huge, still a size 12 now I feel fine. Honestly though, your metabolism will be slowing down. Stop snacking and try calorie counting just to set a baseline as you may not have been aware of how much you could get away with before. I’ve never been able to get away with anything!

I was a size 6-8 for a while even after my first born.

OP posts:
Bendylendy · 06/04/2025 18:53

Clearingaspace · 06/04/2025 18:51

This is probably really what is making you sad op

Maybe a lot of men do this but I wouldn’t know if it’s ok or normal or not.

OP posts:
Clearingaspace · 06/04/2025 18:51

Bendylendy · 06/04/2025 18:47

Also a bit paranoid about my hubby as I’m sure he follows scantily clad women on insta who might be curvy but not fat!

This is probably really what is making you sad op

girljulian · 06/04/2025 18:51

This makes me feel better about never having been a size 8 even as a teen. When I was a size 12 then I felt huge, still a size 12 now I feel fine. Honestly though, your metabolism will be slowing down. Stop snacking and try calorie counting just to set a baseline as you may not have been aware of how much you could get away with before. I’ve never been able to get away with anything!