AIBU to expect the house value to be split evenly?

This.
Please don't let him walk all over you.

No, 50/50 is fair

I’ve voted YABU because you are more than entitled to half! You looked after the children, saving him a fortune! You will no doubt have the children & need a good house. Don’t give in to this!

Nope. 50/50. Speak to your lawyer. Presuming you are keeping the children, you actually need a bigger house than him. Be hard headed about this, rather than "nice". It's not easy.

hahah nice try from him!!

it starts at 50/50 - you may get more

do not forget pensions /shares/savings etc -you ARE entitled to half

get a dam good solicitor and remember now divorce is on the table, you are NOT friends. this is business. do not be kind, because i can tell you now he wont be

Please don’t even entertain this idea without legal advice. Starting point 50/50. You managing the home while renovations happening is worth something significant.

There was no such thing as 'his' money within the marriage, there was family money and there are family assets.
Starting point 50/50 of everything- potentially more to you if your earning potential has been capped.and you would struggle to buy a new house or maintain the children's lifestyle.

You are entitled to 50% of everything once pooled. So 50% of the house, 50% of the total value of any savings and the pensions you have been you as a stating point. How much you both were earning isn’t relevant as a starting point. If you have sacrificed your career for his and the family you may be entitled to more.

Don't accept ANY less than half!

Or charge him for the child bearing & rearing you have done, equivalent at least to the costs of removation.

He's an arse & it sounds like divorce will free you from an arse.

But really you should try for a split nearer to 60% for you ^ 40% for him, to cover your lost earning opportunities AND pension!, foregone by you BOTH choosing that you would stay at home to rear your joint children.

He can dream on.

What does your solicitor say?

So if you are tenants in common the split will be set out in that legally and needs to be followed

if you mean joint tenants it is still 50/50

given you were on maternity leave he is talking rubbish

whst is your current earning capacity
other assets including pensions
ability to house

anyway get legal advice because he is going to try and screw yiu over

Yeah, I think he’s being reasonable here. I’d just ask him to send over a spreadsheet with the numbers on for you to review.

Meanwhile, I’d create a spreadsheet and calculate the cost of childcare that he owes you for the period you were out of work.

I’d then present him with the bill when he shares his. Hey, based on his logic it might even mean he owes you a bigger share.

It’s great he’s so open about fairness in the face of divorce. You hear so often how messy these things can become.

No your proposal is not fair.

It should be 50/50 or possibly more in your favour given loss of earnings due to providing childcare.

This. Very much this.

@jumbojumbo - you need to educate yourself.

• Wikivorce
• Divorce for Dummies or similar
• family solicitor websites

You need to get legal advice then decide whether it is worth fighting, if he is going to be a dick about it then the legal costs of the battle could outweigh the increased amount you could get in a settlement if you go to court.

The cost of full time nursery is over £1000 a month so make sure you are billing him for that in return. The split should be 50/50.

YABU to entertain the idea that he should be entitled to more than 50% of the house. You need to look at all the finances including house equity, pensions and earning potential. Presumably, having given up work to raise children, your pension is smaller and your earning potential is much less than his. He will have been building his career while you were enabling him to by taking care of the children.

As you have been the primary carer of the children, I assume you'll be the resident parent? In which case you need to house them, obviously. It might be in the children's best interests to stay in the family home - there are various factors to consider including nearby childcare/schools and support network of family and/or friends for you.

See https://www.advicenow.org.uk/get-help/family-and-children/divorce-and-separation/sorting-out-your-finances-when-you-get-divorced
And consult a solicitor. You local citizens advice would be a good place to start as they're likely to be able to signpost you to free or low cost law clinics, solicitors offering a free or fixed fee initial consultation.

@jumbojumbo the starting point in a divorce is 50/50 of everything including his pension and yours then if there's a disparity in income and children you'll probably be entitled to more than 50%but you need to talk to a solicitor find out what you are entitled to. Please don't let this man bully you out of what's rightfully yours

Where are you and the kids going to rehouse suitably? At what price? It’s all very well him wanting to buy you out but depending on where the kids are going to live and with whom (or will it be 50/50 shared care?) will determine who gets what % of the property.

You were married so it’s 50/50 split.

50/50

How dare he?! He paid for it my arse! You paid for it in lost earnings while caring for his children so enable him to keep earning. Don’t let him minimise your contribution like this.

Ha, he’s a joker isn’t he? You might actually be entitled to more, never mind 50/50. Do not agree to any split less than this. You were looking after your joint children, and you’re married, he’s trying to take the piss.

Assuming he agreed with you being a sahp then it's needs to be split equally. You both contributed - you allowed him to be able to work while sorting out the kids etc

What’s listed the tenants in common? You usually specify the split there.