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Original poster

A casual friend has just told me she's standing as a Reform candidate

417 replies

Mumblechum0 · 05/04/2025 15:25

And I have no clue how to respond.

I've always liked her, we're not close, ie don't do anything just the two of us, but are often in the same group at parties, book group, joint birthday bashes etc.

She's very posh, professional job, husband's a head fund manager (he walks round in a tweed cap and goes shooting on his family estate etc etc...just setting the scene, she's well educated etc.)

Anyway, she messaged me yesterday to say that she wanted me to know in advance that she's standing as a Reform candidate in our local elections; she didn't ask for my support, but didn't want me to just see her face on a leaflet through the door.

I'm married to a black man, have a mixed race son.

I haven't responded yet, as I don't know whether it's best to just ignore, or to say thanks for letting me know, or actually to say I'm quite horrified (which is my actual reaction).

Any ideas?

OP posts:
Hdjdb42 · 05/04/2025 15:59

I wouldn't assume that she's racist. But that party can attract racist people.

Gogogo12345 · 05/04/2025 15:55

PaintYourAssLikeRembrandt · 05/04/2025 15:44

I would thumbs up the message and then block her.

I couldn't be done with anyone who voted reform let alone stood for them.

What if it was your husband or kids that voted reform? What would you actually do?

MrsBennetsPoorNerves · 05/04/2025 15:55

Hmm. I don't think I would say anything, given that you're not close, but I would give her a very wide berth in future.

Lots of my friends have political views that are different from my own, but none of them are on the far right - our values would be utterly incompatible.

Just be glad, I suppose, that she's told you what she's like. At least now you know.

Yorkshirelass04 · 05/04/2025 15:53

PaintYourAssLikeRembrandt · 05/04/2025 15:44

I would thumbs up the message and then block her.

I couldn't be done with anyone who voted reform let alone stood for them.

Too much tolerance of batshit views has led US into its current crisis and led Britain out of the EU. Enoughs enough! Agree!

Yorkshirelass04 · 05/04/2025 15:52

Absolutely you should tell her you're disappointed.

Have you seen how the US government is acting and what it's led to this week?

Who in their right mind would think Reform is the answer to our political and economic issues?

PeopleTalkingWithoutSpeaking · 05/04/2025 15:50

I think I would reply "Thanks for letting me know" then leave it there. Neutral, acknowledges her message without inviting conversation about it.

You can carry on as you are being acquaintances, and hopefully she'll read your tone and keep her politics to herself.

FOJN · 05/04/2025 15:47

You say you're regularly in her company and have always liked her so clearly she hasn't expressed any objectionable views.

Why let it bother you at all if you aren't close?

The party of government never gets 50% or more of the vote so even if you vote for the election winner most of the country disagrees with you but most of us can tolerate people who think differently to ourselves.

PaintYourAssLikeRembrandt · 05/04/2025 15:44

I would thumbs up the message and then block her.

I couldn't be done with anyone who voted reform let alone stood for them.

TheCountessofFitzdotterel · 05/04/2025 15:43

I wouldn’t assume she was a racist either but the fact is her party is a magnet for racists as she will be well aware. I would want a conversation with her to find out what her red lines are wrt racist policies her party might adopt.

BlossomBlossomBlossom · 05/04/2025 15:43

An old uni friend was very prominent in an unpleasantly right wing party. An old uni enemy is on the news every day as a Reform party mouthpiece.

‘‘Tis weird …

Cloudyvibes · 05/04/2025 15:41

Not all reform supporters are racist.

Trees6 · 05/04/2025 15:39

I’m not a Reform voter, I’m left of centre, but her politics are up to her 🤷‍♀️

I wouldn’t say anything to her tbh.

I don’t think that all reform candidates and voters are racist either. That’s a simplistic view.

528htz · 05/04/2025 15:39

I'd feel sorry for her as she must be a bit of an idiot. If we want an idea of how Reform will behave in government just look at the US and what the orange slug is doing to the economy - and everyone else's economy.

I wonder if she has a pension. I wonder if she cares how well it does. All Farage wants is a fire sale.

HenDoNot · 05/04/2025 15:39

Given that you’ve spent time in this woman’s company and you like her, I’ll assume she is an overall nice person, doesn’t have two heads, hasn’t expressed any racist/phobic/whatever views, and hasn’t shoved her politics down your throat.

Like the PP I’ve got friends who support different political parties to me or hold polar opposite opinions on certain things to me, we manage to navigate it just fine, respect each others opinions and agree to disagree.

YorkshireIndie · 05/04/2025 15:38

I think I would find it hard to be her friend. A friend of my parents was planning to stand as a reform candidate and wanted my mum to drop leaflets when she went on visits 😵‍💫 (she declined) and then wanted my dad to campaign with him (also declined)

kanaka · 05/04/2025 15:32

I wouldn’t say anything. You aren’t in a position where you see her 1:1 so just avoid her in a group situation. Whilst I understand that Reform is not a party that we want in government, I wouldn’t just assume this woman is racist. She may just be very frustrated with con and lab, both of which are a disgrace.

Coulddowithanap · 05/04/2025 15:32

I wouldn't really bother to be honest. I've got friends who support different parties but we all get on well and can respect that we don't all have the same opinion about things.