Page 12 | A casual friend has just told me she's standing as a Reform candidate

Mumblechum0 · 2025-04-05T14:25:55+00:00

And I have no clue how to respond. I've always liked her, we're not close, ie don't do anything just the two of us, but are often in the same group at parties, book group, joint birthday bashes etc. She's very posh, professional job, husband's a head fund manager (he walks round in a tweed cap and goes shooting on his family estate etc etc...just setting the scene, she's well educated etc.) Anyway, she messaged me yesterday to say that she wanted me to know in advance that she's standing as a Reform candidate in our local elections; she didn't ask for my support, but didn't want me to just see her face on a leaflet through the door. I'm married to a black man, have a mixed race son. I haven't responded yet, as I don't know whether it's best to just ignore, or to say thanks for letting me know, or actually to say I'm quite horrified (which is my actual reaction). Any ideas?

monktasmic · 05/04/2025 18:53

I’d say ‘thanks for letting me know but I’m not sure we can still hang out’ and then be civil / polite if I saw her but that’d be it. No thanks. These people are terrible. All of them.

Worriedatwork1 · 05/04/2025 18:43

I would just say “thanks for letting me know/being upfront” and then block her

Sirzy · 05/04/2025 18:38

Rainbowpug · 05/04/2025 18:35

They are not going to get in
The future is green

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I hope you’re right. At the moment I think I am voting for our local independent candidate at the upcoming local elections but Green are on my to consider list.

To be honest though for the first time ever my main aim in going out to vote is to help keep Reform out locally rather than really believing in any of the candidates

Rainbowpug · 05/04/2025 18:35

Sirzy · 05/04/2025 18:25

Which makes about as much sense as the female candidate locally.

it’s rather like a Turkey voting for Christmas really!

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They are not going to get in
The future is green

PaintYourAssLikeRembrandt · 05/04/2025 18:34

everythingeverything1981 · 05/04/2025 18:27

Childish

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It's not childish to block someone who's political views could negatively impact your family at all.

It would be ridiculous to keep a racist as a friend, especially in ops situation.

EasternStandard · 05/04/2025 18:34

dapsnotplimsolls · 05/04/2025 18:14

'Thanks for letting me know' is probably the best option. If you ask her why, you'll probably get a rant in return.

Since this is an acquaintance it’s likely those messaged will just do this or similar, and in op’s case start an mn thread about it.

I can’t imagine people kicking off when they go to dc parties, book club together etc

Maitri108 · 05/04/2025 18:30

babasaclover · 05/04/2025 18:17

This is exactly why they will get in cause you judge like this. People want their own say and are sick of being told they are idiots

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The irony.

TranceNation · 05/04/2025 18:30

This topic and the responses here is exactly why I have had nothing to do with politics for the last two elections. I think it's quite sad that people burn personal friendships because of politics. As far as I'm concerned all politicians are slippery self serving power hungry liars just wearing different colour ties and dresses.

everythingeverything1981 · 05/04/2025 18:27

PaintYourAssLikeRembrandt · 05/04/2025 15:44

I would thumbs up the message and then block her.

I couldn't be done with anyone who voted reform let alone stood for them.

Childish

Sirzy · 05/04/2025 18:25

Rainbowpug · 05/04/2025 18:20

Reform have black candidates,the candidate in my area is black

Which makes about as much sense as the female candidate locally.

it’s rather like a Turkey voting for Christmas really!

Goldenbear · 05/04/2025 18:24

Do not need not "do need"!

Goldenbear · 05/04/2025 18:23

wastingtimeonhere · 05/04/2025 18:18

Exactly, this person has stuck her head above parapet, some of her friends and acquaintances will support her, others like op won't. She will upset someone, she will expect it. Some of these responses are so vitriolic that they show themselves in no better light. Intolerance is never a good trait, it entrenches extreme views.

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How does it?.that's not really true is it- so your theory is if someone highlights the extreme, hateful politics of Reform that we definitely do need and won't help anyone, that will make someone think, "I know, that all sounds very attractive and a peaceful way to live, I literally can't stand all that tolerance, I'll go and vote Reform!"

Rainbowpug · 05/04/2025 18:20

Reform have black candidates,the candidate in my area is black

Goldenbear · 05/04/2025 18:19

babasaclover · 05/04/2025 18:17

This is exactly why they will get in cause you judge like this. People want their own say and are sick of being told they are idiots

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Realistically, how will they get in when they are watching what that means in real time in the U.S.

wastingtimeonhere · 05/04/2025 18:18

CaptainMyCaptain · 05/04/2025 18:14

Its not about the confidentiality of the Ballot box this person is standing as a candidate. I would reply OK and probably never speak to them again.

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Exactly, this person has stuck her head above parapet, some of her friends and acquaintances will support her, others like op won't. She will upset someone, she will expect it. Some of these responses are so vitriolic that they show themselves in no better light. Intolerance is never a good trait, it entrenches extreme views.

babasaclover · 05/04/2025 18:17

528htz · 05/04/2025 15:39

I'd feel sorry for her as she must be a bit of an idiot. If we want an idea of how Reform will behave in government just look at the US and what the orange slug is doing to the economy - and everyone else's economy.

I wonder if she has a pension. I wonder if she cares how well it does. All Farage wants is a fire sale.

This is exactly why they will get in cause you judge like this. People want their own say and are sick of being told they are idiots

Goldenbear · 05/04/2025 18:15

Goldenbear · 05/04/2025 18:11

Really, we discuss politics and social issues all of the time in my friendship group, on my WhatsApp groups (local politics), definitely in my family and extended family.

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Mind you I did fall out with my husband's friend on a group holiday as he thought I was overly pessimistic..

dapsnotplimsolls · 05/04/2025 18:14

'Thanks for letting me know' is probably the best option. If you ask her why, you'll probably get a rant in return.

CaptainMyCaptain · 05/04/2025 18:14

wastingtimeonhere · 05/04/2025 18:10

This is why politics and religion are best not discussed. Your political persuasion is between a person and the ballot box. When someone puts their head above the parapet they will offend, insult or otherwise upset others. I'd respond with a thumbs up. and no further comments. You won't be voting for her, so no discussion will change yours or her mind.
Intolerance of others views can be as ugly as the offending view.

Its not about the confidentiality of the Ballot box this person is standing as a candidate. I would reply OK and probably never speak to them again.

Goldenbear · 05/04/2025 18:11

wastingtimeonhere · 05/04/2025 18:10

This is why politics and religion are best not discussed. Your political persuasion is between a person and the ballot box. When someone puts their head above the parapet they will offend, insult or otherwise upset others. I'd respond with a thumbs up. and no further comments. You won't be voting for her, so no discussion will change yours or her mind.
Intolerance of others views can be as ugly as the offending view.

Really, we discuss politics and social issues all of the time in my friendship group, on my WhatsApp groups (local politics), definitely in my family and extended family.

Wells37 · 05/04/2025 18:11

Just don’t talk politics if you genuinely get on. I bet lots of people in your wider friendship group might vote for them too.

wastingtimeonhere · 05/04/2025 18:10

This is why politics and religion are best not discussed. Your political persuasion is between a person and the ballot box. When someone puts their head above the parapet they will offend, insult or otherwise upset others. I'd respond with a thumbs up. and no further comments. You won't be voting for her, so no discussion will change yours or her mind.
Intolerance of others views can be as ugly as the offending view.

Goldenbear · 05/04/2025 18:09

ChildrenOfTheQuorn · 05/04/2025 18:06

I'd be a grown up about it. It's really not a big deal that someone ! shock horror ! has a different political opinion than yourself.

If it is a 'friend', I absolutely would be shocked and horrified that they had chosen to stand as a candidate for such a right wing party. I would honestly question my judgement on becoming friends with that person.

MajorCarolDanvers · 05/04/2025 18:08

It’s reform but the BNP

i wouldnt for for them but they are a mainstream party.

CaptainMyCaptain · 05/04/2025 18:07

Icanthinkformyselfthanks · 05/04/2025 17:53

@PandoraSox , I was reading an article today about a young woman who tweeted an admittedly unpleasant comment in the first few hours after the Southport attack which she thought better of and removed four short hours later. She had a previously unblemished record and was suffering from depression following the death of one of her children. She was a childminder and cared for children from quite a cross section of races whose parents wrote glowing character reports in her defence. She was jailed for 2.5 years. She repeatedly asks to be allowed what should be her right to visit her 12 year old daughter but is consistently refused. There was no mercy shown to any person who was found to have committed the slightest wrong following those riots. I’m very confident that many people would have loved to have jailed Mr Farage if they could have found reason to do so but they could not. As I recall he questioned what we were being told which was that the perpetrator was a Welsh ex choirboy and there absolutely was no connection to terrorism. As was evidenced by the reaction of many people who came out onto the streets (I absolutely do not condone rioting) others shared his scepticism. Those that sought to conceal the truth are responsible for the riots no one else.

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I think that's a skewed take on what happened there.