To say stay-at-home mums have it easier than full-time workers?

I think both are hard for different reasons. Doesn’t always need to be one harder than another.
think would be best if you both supported each other and agreed (if you ever chat about it) that it’s hard for both of you.

of course will feel a little different if your friend has 1 child who’s at nursery so she has time at home on her own a lot

I work FT in a v demanding job. I’d rather work twice the hours than be a SAHM. At least I get workers rights! YABU

I personally LOVE these women bashing daily mail esque threads. Everyone has problems and everyone’s lives are different, why do you care

Oh hi @SouthLondonMum22

And, it isn’t what I said.

You can moan to a friend without also making comments about a friends situation.

You then can't be surprised if friend gets fed up and then comments about their situation. Instead, you think she should just be quiet and put up with it.

We could debate forever what most people would find easier but what’s all this “have it” about? So what if someone makes choices that allow them to live their life in the way they find easiest? Why talk about them like they “have it easy and don’t know it”? They’re allowed to moan about their job the same way anyone is allowed to moan about their job.

Right…how dare she moaning to a friend…what the world has come to?

😳😳😳👀

In my experience it feels like they have it easier when you're working. And then when you're at home for a while you wish you had the freedom to dress up, go to work and have a coffee in peace.

I think both are really hard!

Part time (3/4 days) i have found is the best of both worlds!

I felt most judged as a SAHM and worried about not having an income, divorce etc. But I valued my time at home and don't regret it..

I was just as busy at home when had under school ages... at least at work you can go to the toilet!

Working has been good overall as I did end up a lone parent and it has meant I can make choices I couldn't have otherwise (eg keep my house). I also find it helps my identity and self esteem.

Guess it all depends on the set up! I wouldn't judge someone else for doing something different. Wish we all had a choice.

I have been a SAHM and I am currently a working mum.

Both of them have been difficult in different ways, both tiring and both overwhelming at times.

One thing I did find easier was being at work meant I got a lunch break (time to eat a bit of food in peace without little hands trying to grab it!), other than that I would say it was pretty much the same amount of stress etc.

I’ve just gone back to work, my DD is one year old. Work is 10x easier than being at home

I've done both. I would work full time any day! In fact, I went to work to get away. Imagine a job you can literally never leave.

Why does it actually matter??? 🙄🙄🙄

I do 2.5 days at home with toddler, 2.5 days in the office. Office days are MUCH easier 😂. There’s so many variables though it’s just different for different people and personalities. This is such a silly debate.

Then the same should apply to her friend. If she wants to moan about being a SAHM, despite having school hours to herself then that's fine but she should leave OP out of it.

Making comments about OP is inviting her to comment about her situation too.

Having done both, for me being a SAHM was much easier. I had a big job and it was stressful trying to manage the work/life balance - it felt like one was always suffering. I felt I was doing two full time jobs as their Father - exH - was doing nothing.

Yes.

If you can’t find something nice to say, then usually the best policy is to be quiet.

OP, I've seen you're a mom too.
I'm SAHM at the moment, but literally know it's easier to drop them to school and go to work than stay home with them whole day.

So OP's friend is allowed to comment about her being ''lucky'' despite her having children in school all day but OP has to just take it and be quiet?

And again 😂👀

No women ever needed a man to put them down. Other women are great at it 👍🏼

As a mum who works FT, has 3 kids, 3 dogs, and studies FT with uni - I work compressed hours to juggle this and I'm in my final year and about to start my Masters...

....I think you're being a thundering bitch.

I've also been a SAHM.

If you can't be kind- Be quiet.

I would rather said: 'Depends how challenging your child are!' I never felt any job as challenging as my little one. I'm SAHM at the time being and exhausted. I love him to pieces, but I can not do anything till he falls asleep. And by that time I'm dead.

So I have seen it from both sides.

when I had my son I worked FT and retuned to work 3 months after he was born. I was in a horrible relationship, and ended up being forced out of work about 3 months later. Those 3 months away from my baby was horrific.

once I left work, my relationship ended and I was a SAHM for 3 years. I went back to PT work when my son was 4, and full times work when he was 8; and I’ve worked full time ever since. He’s now 17.

both have pros and cons.

As a SAHM, I found I had lots of time to keep my home tidy, washing done, tea planned and done etc. I had time at the park, time to go shopping, to spend with friends and family, to go to places like soft play etc, go to nursery (1 morning a week) plays, Mother’s Day afternoons….i had a really good routine and loved my safe home….however I was really lonely. I didn’t have many friends due to my relationship breakdown…. I loved being a SAHM and did find it very easy to do. I would LOVE to have been able to be a SAHM for my sons entire life… but couldn’t due to finances and I wanted to have a job and career.

When I worked PT, I enjoy the company of other adults, I enjoyed the routine and I enjoyed my job (in a different one now). I hated leaving him at nursery (9-4, months-thurs) it seamed so long! But he loved it and flourished. I hated missing the plays, the special afternoons and being told of the special things he got up to; which I’d missed due to work. Days seamed long; I’d get up at 6, out for 8, at work for 10-2pm, then head back and collect him. I was on public transport too. I was always tired when I got home, made tea and then he was in bed for 7pm…. So only got an hour or 2 with him. Washing piled up and cleaning wasn’t done in the week….and I found myself doing it at the weekends, when I should have been going to the park or playing with him. Trying to fit it all in on my days off…. As well as shopping and visiting friends/family was just impossible!

I was a single parent until he was 8 and I met my (now) husband, who stepped into the family man role after about a year when we started living together and it got easier.
I love my job and career, but I found being a working mom so much harder than being a SAHM.

However! Everyone’s experiences are different and I am very aware that I only had one child.

I used to think this, then I noticed all the stay at home ‘married single mothers’ some stay at home sometimes stuck in the house with children all day while the man is off at work and helps little with the kids even on his days off. Not much better off in terms of family time or finances.
If it’s getting too much for you personally look into reducing your work hours part time/ term time. The grass is never greener on the other side

I know we all like abbreviations etc lol...but when I'm reading a thread I'm constantly googling most of the abbreviations because I don't know the 100s out there and what half of them mean...is this just me lol oops