DP’s messages in group chat - do I confront him?

Oh and in case you missed it, op ..... Middle aged (and probably all ages of) men go to brothels on golf trips in Spain and Portugal. I had it from the horse's mouth of a long term golfer.

Just to let you know for future.

I think if a man tried to win my forgiveness by buying me basic cliched shit like flowers and chocolate I'd be even more livid than I was in the first place.

His "explanation" was laughable too.

Most of us rub along with an imperfect man because we're imperfect women.

Ah, thinking a man is a shit one for sleazing over his sister in law to be's body with his mates and pronouncing whether he'd fuck their female acquaintances or not - now makes someone a misandrist!!!!!

Got it.

I think you mixed up the words misandrist and misogynist....there are certainly lots of misogynists on this thread.
They must really hate women to encourage one to throw in their lot with someone like him.

wedding plans in full swing

Be sure to run your sister's bridesmaid dress choice by your fiancé.

That would only be fair, given his high hopes that it will be figure hugging and low cut - for he and his mates to enjoy.

Are the female friends he feels the need to say he "wouldn't ride" and the one he feels the need to comment on having a great body (but must be crazy cause she can't "keep" a man in spite of the great body") going to attend the wedding??

Maybe you should let him know his true opinions of them so they don't attend, spend money on nice outfits, spend money on transport, spend money on gifts for you both etc ....not knowing that your groom tells his mates that one of them is too ugly to fuck, and the other one must be a nutcase cause she can't keep a man in spite of her good body.

I wouldn't let his friend who knows all the skeletons in his closet do a speech either. Keep him sober and out of the proceedings.

Sounds like a lovely wedding.

Anyway I suppose women in general should be grateful you're taking this cretin out of circulation. Someone else might have ended up with him; if you're so willing to be the sacrifice, well ....

Have a great time. The misandrists are out in full dementor garb this weekend, all over the site. Just crack on having a lovely day. @PollyJH

I genuinely feel really sad for you

Yes the bridesmaids dresses will be huge, high necked sacks not showing an inch of flesh just in case the groom can't control himself 😂

You've been on MN that long and you're this clueless??

I'm wondering now if you're a troll.

Also you czn absolutely be guaranteed those screen shots will be shared by that other woman around the wedding.
Everyone else knowing exactly the type the groom is, that the bride knows as well, but was gung ho to get married.

When things invariably goes tits up, word gets round he is messing on the side, did it on the stag, sympathy will be in short supply as the bride walked down the isle, eye's wide open.

There is so much more to a marriage than the wedding day ....unfortunately those who don't get that, pay a high price the hard way.

What’s the bet the OP will start to demonise her sister if she wears anything even slightly revealing. She’s already demonised the friend who outed this whole thing.
it’ll be the sister next. Anyone but the man because the OP would then have to accept he’s a class one arse.

Whilst sitting with the man who openly said he hoped your sister was wearing something tight and low
🤮

OP you are gaslighting YOURSELF now
I’m sorry this is hard. But it’s also real.

No. What’s disgusting is this repulsive man

Don’t feel embarrassed. Feel sad for her

I’m embarrassed for you. This reminds me of all the social media posts where they are the perfect couple and one is an open cheat.

@PollyJH can you explain your comment that he didn’t talk about your sister, because your earlier post about the screenshot definitely states he talked about your sister in a derogatory way. There is no context as far as I can see from that message that he wasn’t talking about your sister. If he was trying to shut the conversation he should have said he wanted to shut the conversation down. And if he wasn’t able to say that then he needs new mates.

Are you going to tell your sister about the conversation and what your partner and his mates think about her? If not, then you know that the conversation wasn’t appropriate

He told me the bridesmaid comment was out of context and not made about my sister at all, but more generally he was pre empting crude comments from his friends so wanted to shut it down with a bit of ‘humour’ before they started getting on at him. He said he sees my sister as his own family and is horrified it came across in that way.

Seriously, you believe that? He literally said he hopes the dresses are tight and low when asked if your sister is a bridesmaid.

It's one thing talking to the lads about random strangers but to actually talk about your sister is too far, and he DID talk about your sister. I'm not saying he has a thing for your sister but he clearly thinks she has a hot body hence why he hopes the dresses will be tight and low.

I think OP's desperation to have a wedding is making her ignore her natural instincts.

Most people would die of embarrassment walking down the aisle knowing that several people at the wedding are aware of the groom's sexual fantasies about the bride's friends and sister! Can you imagine how awkward it will be very time she sees him talking to the bridesmaids, knowing he has been fantasising about their tits?

Good luck love

Well you certainly won’t be…

I think you’re being very sensible, op.