Would this bother you? Am I being an Uber protective drama Queen?

Do you have the car serviced regularly?

It would say don’t drive as with very little oil you would destroy the engine. Do you guys get the cars regularly serviced?

It broke down, you had it repaired, and now you think it’s dangerous?

You are being ridiculously OTT. People drive old motors all the time. Also, newer cars also break down, there is no guarantee. I would feel less safe in a hire car than my own little old motor that I knew well. These things are absolutely thrashed by drivers. Last time I had to use a hire car I was checking the tyres when I collected it and discovered it had a massive screw in the front offside. That had the potential to cause a slow puncture at best, blowout on the motorway at worst. I refused the car, they refused to give me a different car and I had to fight for weeks to have my money refunded.

your car isn’t unsafe because it is old, you say it’s had countless problems but only mentioned one incident where you don’t actually say what was wrong. If you are able to list the problems perhaps we could put your mind at rest?

Oh I agree a car had to be on its last legs but we maintain them and i can do most basic maintenance myself so I think it makes it easier.

She’s not in danger.

100,000 isn’t game over for cars. It depends on the car and how it has been maintained.

all cars have things that break and need replacing, this is normal. If it’s not been looked after - regular service, mot, tyres and oil checked - it’s more likely to have things go wrong but just being old isn’t a reason in itself.

what needed replacing?

mine had an oil leak and I had to take it immediately to the garage but it was just a plastic tube that needed replacing.

Apart from one which the gearbox died and one which was written off when some twat drove into mum, we've never let a car go till it's done at least 200k. Uncle has an older version of my current car, both Toyotas, and it's done 330k and counting - definitely not game over at 100k!

If it's an engine light you could get yourself one of these and the free Torque app which means you can read them - one of my cars had a frequent one which was to do with something I'd removed and not something that needed garage attention every time it pinged. https://amzn.eu/d/3i7KhlQ

But also you're not being unreasonable and DP should make a decision on a new car if the money is there!

Yep that what I suggested. I didn’t get one for years but I regretted not getting one sooner after I did 😂

Our main car is 17 years old and has done well over 100 000 miles. Our small car (bought 7 years ago for teens learning to drive) is 14 years old and has done nearly 100 000. We have done loads of long trips in both, so I don't think a big mileage is game over, as long as they are maintained and issues have been properly fixed.

Could you get a roof rack or roof box fitted on your car? I have one our larger car for ski and surfing trips and it fits loads of things in and you can take it off when not needed? Might give you more flexibility.

I agree I wouldn’t want to be rushed into it either.

I have no interest in cars either but if the one I needed was broken I’d be researching and test driving and getting it done. I wouldn’t be waiting and moaning that nothing by was happening! I bet if you started looking he’d want to take over anyway so it would probably happen quicker without you having to do it all?

14 years and 100,000 miles doesn't mean your car is inherently undriveable or unsafe - when was its last MOT?

I do think the safety angle is a little OOT but if you're concerned about a breakdown, which I agree would be a pain, just hire a car and drive it yourself. Take control and take anything DH has to do out of the equation.

I have no interest in water bills, comparing insurance, prams, general household appliances, but it’s pretty easy to google and learn enough to be able to purchase something. Maybe now is the time to do a quick bit of research and buy a car, if you’re that worried about safety make it happen yourself and choose a safe car.

It is actually quite hard to find a decent second hand car if that is what he wants to do and is looking for a particular type. It's not just the cost he might want to consider but the tax costs, age of car, mileage. Also he might have to travel around to find a car which again isn't always easy and if it is a good deal it's likely it will be sold quickly.

Even buying a new car isn't that simple as it may not actually be at the garage and you might have to wait for it to be delivered.

my little run about has 375,000 kms on it (250,000 Miles) and she is going strong. 2007 model. She has been driving my daughter around safely for years.

3 weeks is plenty of time to get a new (2nd hand car, at least).
I had to change mine recently as my old one was beyond economical repair. I test drove one on Friday and picked it up the following Tuesday.

I feel your pain re the head in the sand DH though. My DH had issues with a light coming on intermittently on his car. He declared it to be fine. We set off on a 4 hour journey over the Christmas holidays to visit family and unsurprisingly we broke down half way there! Had to abandon the trip and return home on the back of a truck!
He then insisted that we do the trip again the following day in my car, which although roadworthy (recently serviced and MOTd), I'd been advised to trade in sooner rather than later. It wasn't a very relaxing journey tbh.

And because of Christmas, garages were all shut so DHs car was off the road for 3 weeks. If only he'd sorted it out when the problem first arose!

It's not necessarily danger I'd be concerned about, more the inconvenience of something going wrong and being stranded. You're right to want to get a new car as soon as possible.
You make him go shopping for one this weekend.

That's ridiculous. As you say it would take hours and be a nightmare to co-ordinate. Honestly, I agree with everyone else, you're going to have to take control of this situation and just refuse to go in his car. Hire a car yourself for you and your daughter.

Say you will hire a car if it can't be sorted in time. That's your line. I agree that for a 400 mile journey you want to be in a well maintained, properly working car.

But the family car is fixed? And 100,000 miles on a car is not that much.

But why can’t you go in your car ? Are you taking a lot of luggage to Devon?