He really has forgotten about me

I'm sure a few airport choccies can't be that expensive for a man who can afford to fly business class.

Ok when’s your holiday booked? It’s the only way to change things

A gift on return from a trip signifies “I missed you. I thought about you. I wanted to treat you. I kept you in mind even when you were not in front of me.” Wanting that recognition is not childish! Not doing it—not thanking OP for her work holding down the fort—is taking her for granted. She’s not the hired help. She’s not a store bought appliance.

If he's not typically selfish and inconsiderate, I'd be inclined to think he simply doesn't realise how hard you've worked and how challenging it's been to be on your own for two weeks with DC and dog. I'd then be equally inclined to fix that with some experiential learning.

On the surface, I think crying (or just being annoyed) over not getting a present is a bit childish and I'd be a bit unimpressed if that was my reception when I'd been away for weeks. But appreciate that you have been struggling with solo parenting, lack of sleep and a sick dog.

For me, unless he'd found something unusual that he knew I'd love (not likely at an airport or if he were spending time with his family), a present would be tokenism and neither of us have much time for that. We're not kids impressed by airport teddy bears and "I 💖[city]" t-shirts.

Was there something he should have known to get you? Do you always get a particular bottle from duty free? Or is there something available in his family's home town that you love and can't get elsewhere?

I think he should be extraordinarily grateful to you and should be planning to take over extra chores and childcare and make sure you get time to yourself. Is this likely? I don't think a present from a trip to see family is necessarily a good indication of his love and appreciation for you, but if there is no indication of that love and appreciation that's a big problem.

Did DH’s family not send any gifts for you?! My DH went to visit his sister abroad and his parents were also visiting her at the time. When he returned he only bought me some dates with cashew nuts as those are my favourite delicacy from the middle east. But my BIL and SIL sent me a Tory Burch handbag and my inlaws a gucci perfume gift set. They also sent gifts for the kids. DH had to buy an additional suitcase as he usually travels very light! 😂 Mind you, I did send gifts for all of them when he went out to visit so they all reciprocated. He said he figured I was getting enough presents so he got the dates. I was happy as I wasn’t expecting anything!

Or a nice perfume

I second this but go one step further and say go and spend the weekend with a friend or relative and let him take over everything for a short while. Perhaps even a hotel if you fancy doing nothing but relaxing.

I wouldn’t expect any gifts, especially not chocolate from the airport - isn’t it ridiculously expensive?

I think it’s a bit childish to expect a box of chocolates just because the kids got stuff.

And I wouldn’t expect a Mother’s Day text from anyone other than my children.

But I would feel upset at feeling unappreciated.

It does sound like he kept in contact regularly though and so I’m not sure how he can make you feel more appreciated apart from telling you to go and relax whilst he takes over the parenting and household duties for a couple of days.

So if he hasn’t done this then YANBU, if he has offered to do this then YABU and probably just tired.

DH travels weekly for work and always goes into M &S to get a treat for both me and the kids - I’m not sure he did when they were tiny though . He’s done it OP - what counts now is what he does or doesn’t do to make it better . I truly hope you at least get a genuine apology

What is it with men fucking sulking when they've had their attention drawn to the fact they have behaved poorly? Why do they seem to want to compound their crapness?

Now he’s sulking because I got upset.

I think blokes who get upset about this sort of thing, just don't like being called out on things, it's not because they think they are right and you're wrong, it's because they don't like it pointing out to them and take it as a personal attack.

I used to work for one of those, if I ever showed any annoyance about him cocking something up he would hit the roof, the first couple of times he did it and I stood there in stunned silence, after that I used to just walk out while he was mid meltdown and go home till the next day.. fuck him and his inability to regulate his emotions.

You have a right to be upset OP, I do think he needs to show more appreciation for what it took for him to have this two week care-free holiday, hopefully after his sulkathon he'll come to his senses and come to apologise and thank you for everything you do.

When left to cope with baby, toddler and dog on her own for 2 weeks, damn YES!!

My DH brings me a gift if he’s only away for a weekend, to show he loves and misses me.

anyone who thinks this treatment is ok has too low a bar for their partner’s behaviour. But then I see you (quoted poster Herbychops) being chippy with OP’s all over this site as if women asking to be treated well is somehow beyond the pale.

and the sulking - omg. He needs a talking to. Idiot.

When is your two weeks away while he looks after the kids?

My DH travels a lot for work and he always brings me a gift home, even if it's just a bar mat that made him think of me or a bar of chocolate and the only thing I'm in charge of while he's away is our old dog. OP, you are absolutely in the right here to feel overlooked and taken for granted. Hopefully when he's grown up and stopped sulking you can sit down and explain why you were upset.

If he’s travelling to a lovely two week holiday whilst I’m ill with a poorly dog and children at home running on no sleep then abso-bloody-lutely yes! And if it was the other way round I would be bringing something mega thoughtful back to say thank you for holding the fort under difficult circumstances which allowed me to go and have a great holiday! I don’t know if it’s just me but the bar feels really low sometimes…

Well just because your DH did one thing there is no need to be so scathing and unpleasant to OP because her situation was different to yours!

So what?

@Sherararara I do think that’s a completely different situation though, travelling multiple times for work, absolutely agree gifts are completely unnecessary but for what is essentially a two-week holiday where you know your wife is not having the easiest time at home I think a token of thoughtfulness is a minimum expectation. I travelled abroad to a wedding a few years ago with my partner and his friends, and every single one of the friends (whose wives didn’t attend) bought a gift from duty free at the airport - perfume, make up, chocolates etc. similarly when my partner attended a wedding in Cyprus last year he brought me back my favourite perfume and Prosecco from the airport. It’s really not a lot to expect unless the bar is incredibly low. Virtually everyone I know would do this, especially knowing the other person has been having a rough time

I wouldn’t talk about gifts, Mothers Day etc ( unless they are very important to you) because it could easily detract from the real issue , which his complete lack of appreciation of you in general. He should be bloody ashamed that he’s left you to deal with all that. Even if you were happy for him to go, he should realise what sacrifices and effort you made to enable him to do that. That’s what you need to tell him, in my opinion. Dont make it about the gifts

But OP's DH wasn't travelling for work.
He was travelling for pleasure. And he wouldn't have been able to it if OP hadn't enabled him

And surely even if he had been travelling for work that doesn't explain why he didn't even acknowledge Mother's Day.

He managed to buy gifts for the children, so why not his wife?

So I don't see the relevance of your comment at all.

Not ridiculous in the slightest, I would feel so upset as well. How you managed to hold the fort whilst fighting what sounds like multiple different fires is more than worthy of a thoughtful gift and some appreciation. I hope he realises this and I hope you have some chilled out me-time lined up imminently!