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AIBU?

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AIBU to find people who don’t read threads before commenting rude?

106 replies

Aintnobodygottime · 02/04/2025 19:07

I don’t understand people who post on the sixth page of a thread and comment purely on the OP. It feels extremely rude. They often ask questions already answered at length, drag the conversation back from where it has naturally gone to, repeat misunderstanding, or just make a contribution that is pointless. Surely if you’re going to invest the time to post at all, you at least read the OP’s posts and the last few comments? Otherwise it comes across as just not caring and not really engaging, not to mention slightly odd to think that no one else might have made your basic point already.

It makes posting on long threads very frustrating to see the same things being said over and over.

OP posts:
Differentstarts · 02/04/2025 19:43

Aintnobodygottime · 02/04/2025 19:41

But you’ve wasted your time even commenting if you’re replying to the OP at the end of a long thread surely? Where’s the added value? What was the point?!

Because I don't need a reply or acknowledgement for what I post. Il say my thoughts and opinions and then its up to op if they want to read it and take it on board or not

mysecretshame · 02/04/2025 19:42

Differentstarts · 02/04/2025 19:40

How much spare time do you have to read every comment written on mumsnet. I have 2 small children, a job, a partner and a life. Skimming is just fine

Don't add to the noise then if you don't have something informed to add. A 300 post thread would only be 200 if everyone read the thread. Not every single post but enough to get the general gist.

Differentstarts · 02/04/2025 19:41

Goody2ShoesAndTheFilthyBeast · 02/04/2025 19:40

I think they don't much care about adding to the conversation in a meaningful way, or care what other people have posted. They just type their piece and click away.

100% this its an Internet forum it's not that deep

Aintnobodygottime · 02/04/2025 19:41

Differentstarts · 02/04/2025 19:40

How much spare time do you have to read every comment written on mumsnet. I have 2 small children, a job, a partner and a life. Skimming is just fine

But you’ve wasted your time even commenting if you’re replying to the OP at the end of a long thread surely? Where’s the added value? What was the point?!

OP posts:
Differentstarts · 02/04/2025 19:41

Aintnobodygottime · 02/04/2025 19:38

What’s the irony?

You’ve said the OP (and everyone else following the discussion presumably) can scroll past your comment if they like but doesn’t it feel a bit hollow to spend time posting something in a vacuum with any attempt to engage with the substance of the thread?

The irony is the poster I was replying to didn't read my comment properly

Goody2ShoesAndTheFilthyBeast · 02/04/2025 19:40

I think they don't much care about adding to the conversation in a meaningful way, or care what other people have posted. They just type their piece and click away.

Aintnobodygottime · 02/04/2025 19:40

starrynight009 · 02/04/2025 19:38

The problem is that 5 out of the 6 pages is usually just people arguing with each other. I think it can sometimes be helpful for someone to come along replying to the OP about the original issue they wanted support for. It can get things back on track.

I appreciate it's a bit frustrating if people are asking the same questions though. I make sure I've at least read all of the OPs posts.

I totally agree with that, and also of course posts and posts all just responding to the OP. But that’s why reading the OP’s posts at least is worth taking the few seconds to do. If a thread is of epic length but the OP never posted a second time I tend not to engage with it unless totally fascinated by the subject!

OP posts:
Differentstarts · 02/04/2025 19:40

CarpetKnees · 02/04/2025 19:37

So how will they know if your comment is useful / helpful / useless, if they don't read it ?

How much spare time do you have to read every comment written on mumsnet. I have 2 small children, a job, a partner and a life. Skimming is just fine

Aintnobodygottime · 02/04/2025 19:38

Differentstarts · 02/04/2025 19:35

I didnt say i dont care what anyone thinks of what i say i said i dont care if people think im idiotic. The irony

What’s the irony?

You’ve said the OP (and everyone else following the discussion presumably) can scroll past your comment if they like but doesn’t it feel a bit hollow to spend time posting something in a vacuum with any attempt to engage with the substance of the thread?

OP posts:
starrynight009 · 02/04/2025 19:38

The problem is that 5 out of the 6 pages is usually just people arguing with each other. I think it can sometimes be helpful for someone to come along replying to the OP about the original issue they wanted support for. It can get things back on track.

I appreciate it's a bit frustrating if people are asking the same questions though. I make sure I've at least read all of the OPs posts.

Differentstarts · 02/04/2025 19:37

ilovesooty · 02/04/2025 19:30

Well I suppose you can't then expect people to take your contributions seriously. Does that mean you only want to post to hear the sound of your own voice?

I wouldn't expect anyone to take anything seriously they read on the Internet and to answer your other question yes I do

CarpetKnees · 02/04/2025 19:37

So how will they know if your comment is useful / helpful / useless, if they don't read it ?

Differentstarts · 02/04/2025 19:36

ErrolTheDragon · 02/04/2025 19:32

But they have to read whatever repetitive or stale comment you’ve made to ascertain its lack of value.
Rude.

Nobody has to do anything

Aintnobodygottime · 02/04/2025 19:35

I guess for me threads are a conversation and that involves interaction with other posters.

OP posts:
Differentstarts · 02/04/2025 19:35

Aintnobodygottime · 02/04/2025 19:23

Why are you posting? If you don’t care what anyone thinks of what you say, and you’re not interested in what anyone else is saying, what are you actually getting from the whole process? I’m genuinely curious.

I didnt say i dont care what anyone thinks of what i say i said i dont care if people think im idiotic. The irony

Smallmercies · 02/04/2025 19:34

You definitely want coloured trainers, not white, and belts are not really in at the moment.

ErrolTheDragon · 02/04/2025 19:32

Differentstarts · 02/04/2025 19:12

Yabu I'm not reading 300 comments to say my opinion. Op can choose to scroll past my comment if they choose

But they have to read whatever repetitive or stale comment you’ve made to ascertain its lack of value.
Rude.

ilovesooty · 02/04/2025 19:30

Differentstarts · 02/04/2025 19:22

But i don't care about looking idiotic to randoms on the Internet

Well I suppose you can't then expect people to take your contributions seriously. Does that mean you only want to post to hear the sound of your own voice?

Aintnobodygottime · 02/04/2025 19:23

Differentstarts · 02/04/2025 19:22

But i don't care about looking idiotic to randoms on the Internet

Why are you posting? If you don’t care what anyone thinks of what you say, and you’re not interested in what anyone else is saying, what are you actually getting from the whole process? I’m genuinely curious.

OP posts:
HauntedHen · 02/04/2025 19:22

Can I also add posters who post on boards like Style and Beauty saying ‘who cares what’s stylish, just wear something comfortable’. Clearly the OP cares or they wouldn’t have posted in style and beauty!

Differentstarts · 02/04/2025 19:22

CarpetKnees · 02/04/2025 19:16

But posters wouldn't make themselves look so idiotic if they at least read all the OP's posts.

No, if I join a thread 17 pages in, I might not read everything, but I'll read all the OP's posts, and then the page or two before I post.

But i don't care about looking idiotic to randoms on the Internet

AlannaOfTrebond · 02/04/2025 19:20

I just think it makes them look a bit thick - do they honestly think nobody else in 25 pages has come up with the blatantly obvious suggestion they have?

At least read all the posts from the OP, there's a bloody button for it!

EmpressaurusKitty · 02/04/2025 19:19

CarpetKnees · 02/04/2025 19:16

But posters wouldn't make themselves look so idiotic if they at least read all the OP's posts.

No, if I join a thread 17 pages in, I might not read everything, but I'll read all the OP's posts, and then the page or two before I post.

They don’t care about looking idiotic, that’s the thing. There was a recent thread where about 30 people made the same comment & looked progressively dafter. All they care about is having their say regardless.

SallyD00lally · 02/04/2025 19:19

It takes a pretty arrogant person to assume their opinion hasn't already been stated repeatedly in 300 posts.

CarpetKnees · 02/04/2025 19:16

Differentstarts · 02/04/2025 19:12

Yabu I'm not reading 300 comments to say my opinion. Op can choose to scroll past my comment if they choose

But posters wouldn't make themselves look so idiotic if they at least read all the OP's posts.

No, if I join a thread 17 pages in, I might not read everything, but I'll read all the OP's posts, and then the page or two before I post.