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Original poster

To not want my 15yr old driving yet?

63 replies

betteronmondays · 02/04/2025 13:37

My son turns 15.5yrs in a month and says can he apply for his provisional driving license in a month and then wants to drive with us under supervision. We live in central London. We drive an expensive car after years of having a cheap small car because we can finally afford one we all fit into. I object to so many things… a 15yr having a say in car decisions. A 15yr driving around London. The cost, responsibility, entitlement, necessity, danger… I mean we hardly even drive we use it to get out of London!
my husband says all he did from the age of 10 is drive and drive his parents around from 15.. I know he’s exaggerating as he was a full boarder from the age of 7yrs. But now I am being made to feel unreasonable…

OP posts:
incandescentglow · 02/04/2025 16:21

redgingerbread · 02/04/2025 16:13

Yeah, but she’s saying no to something not legal. It’s not that she’s saying no he can’t play Fortnite and eat only McDonald’s….

Show quote history

yes but she didn't know that in the beginning did she otherwise she wouldn't have made a thread about it

redgingerbread · 02/04/2025 16:13

incandescentglow · 02/04/2025 16:10

to be fair it's seemingly not as easy as saying no to the kid when you have the dad supporting it too

Yeah, but she’s saying no to something not legal. It’s not that she’s saying no he can’t play Fortnite and eat only McDonald’s….

incandescentglow · 02/04/2025 16:10

to be fair it's seemingly not as easy as saying no to the kid when you have the dad supporting it too

IvanaTinkles · 02/04/2025 16:01

OllysArmyRidesAgain · 02/04/2025 13:52

Just to say, both DH and I have large powerful/expensive cars (not a boast just a fact) and neither of our DC have ever been allowed to drive them, and one is now 25!

I’m not allowed to drive my mum’s sporty car - I’m 45!

CaptainMyCaptain · 02/04/2025 15:59

TeapotCollection · 02/04/2025 13:39

Eh? You have to be 17 to drive <confused>

This. A 15 year old can't drive.

Hankunamatata · 02/04/2025 15:58

You can apply for provisional but can't actually learn to drive car until 17. Dc has had his provisional since turning 16 as its handy ID

murasaki · 02/04/2025 15:57

Nice try, kiddo.

But no.

HolidayC0untdown1234567 · 02/04/2025 15:46

I am in my 50s & have been driving since I was 17

My father will not let me drive his car

So I have to take him places in my car

The entitlement of a 15 year old !

WeeOrcadian · 02/04/2025 15:20

You're NOT going mad, they're talking shite

Your insurance wouldn't even entertain the idea of putting him on the policy (which you'll need to do) at this age

RanyaJerodung · 02/04/2025 15:10

Moveoverdarlin · 02/04/2025 15:06

Both your son and DH are talking bollox. It’s 17.

This!

RanyaJerodung · 02/04/2025 15:09

betteronmondays · 02/04/2025 13:51

THANKYOU I thought I was going mad.

Why on earth are you listening to him?
Just shut this nonsense down.

Marianwallace · 02/04/2025 15:09

Definitely 17. And yes the insurance will be prohibitive.

Moveoverdarlin · 02/04/2025 15:06

Both your son and DH are talking bollox. It’s 17.

Radiatorvalves · 02/04/2025 15:05

I’m in London and neither of my kids drive - 18 & 20. It’s not uncommon (and very different to when I was there she, living in thee sticks. I sort of wish they’d learn, but then think about the cost. We have an automatic discovery. Totally unsuited to learners. I think they may need an intensive course at some point.

dementedpixie · 02/04/2025 15:01

He's being ridiculous. My ds learned to drive at 17 but didn't get to drive our larger more powerful cars. Once he passed his test we got him a small 1L car that he could drive

Chimummy73 · 02/04/2025 14:51

My son learnt to drive aged 14 purely because pals own a farm so he was off road, he did need a couple of lessons when he turned 17 to brush up to test expectation level (ie tweaking bad habits!) definitely wouldn’t have happened if we still lived in London! He’s 24 now and a brilliant driver.
Some places offer experience days for juniors, maybe a birthday present idea so he can try it and scratch his itch?

MrsAvocet · 02/04/2025 14:14

To be honest, even when he gets to 17 and can legally drive you may find that the cost of insurance precludes it. It seems bad when they are learning and the when they pass it sky rockets! We live in a rural area where learning to drive at 17 is almost essential due to the lack of public transport so we had to grin and bear it really, but if we lived in a big city with good public transport that enables a teen to travel independently I wouldn't have rushed at it. I imagine it's even more expensive in London than elsewhere. I'd be a bit careful how you discuss this with your DS. Don't tell him that he can't drive until he is 17 because although that's true he'll probably interpret it as meaning that he can drive when he is 17 and that might not be feasible. I think I'd probably phrase it as something like "You definitely can't drive until you are at least 17. We'll discuss it again then."

Original poster
betteronmondays · 02/04/2025 14:01

That would be fun in London 😂

OP posts:
akkakk · 02/04/2025 13:59

He can drive a tractor from 16 😄

peachescariad · 02/04/2025 13:57

Just say no then - simple

Topseyt123 · 02/04/2025 13:55

He can apply for his provisional licence in the next couple of months but then cannot drive on public roads until he is 17 (supervised or not), with the possible exception of a disability, which might allow him to start sooner.

You won't be able to get insurance for him so tell him firmly that it's just not happening. End of story!

RedToothBrush · 02/04/2025 13:55

Great! He understands at 15, he will need to get a job as soon as he turns 16 to afford lessons and get insurance in time after he's passed his tests.

Well done for your son having such foresight!

OllysArmyRidesAgain · 02/04/2025 13:52

Just to say, both DH and I have large powerful/expensive cars (not a boast just a fact) and neither of our DC have ever been allowed to drive them, and one is now 25!

labradorservant · 02/04/2025 13:51

If OP lived anywhere but London I think we would be asking about private land etc, but doubt that’s much of that in London. I think people are completely missing the point that he needs to be 17 unless he’s disabled. And then there is the decision about what he can drive.