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AIBU?

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Leaving 15 week old

83 replies

Zoobabies · 02/04/2025 10:57

We go away every year with a couple of close friends for the weekend however this year I have a 15 week old baby which I will be leaving for the first time overnight with grandparents.

The friends wanted to set off early morning and I requested that we leave two hours later to give me time to sort LG and do handover to grandparents. The room could not be checked till 3 pm and we will be there well before that even leaving at my time.

They refused and stated that they wanted to make a day of it drinking, and if we wanted to leave later to do the three hour drive ourselves and meet them there bearing in mind we have driven the last two years running, am I being unreasonable to be upset and hurt that they think more of an extra couple of hours drinking than us as friends and our LG?

If they had wanted to leave late evening to accommodate their children, even if I didn’t like it, I still would have agreed because their kids mean the world to me and there needs to come first.

OP posts:
curious79 · 02/04/2025 11:03

Your friends are right not to wait

Equally your baby is sub 4months - I couldn’t have left my DD at that point. Is that the real issue?!

BIWI · 02/04/2025 11:02

am I being unreasonable to be upset and hurt that they think more of an extra couple of hours drinking than us as friends and our LG?

Well, yes, actually. They want to be spending the weekend with you. They’ve suggested a compromise.

Is this more about being worried about leaving your baby behind? Which is quite understandable! But don’t let that impact on enjoying some time away with your friends.

Focusevaporation · 02/04/2025 11:01

I think when you've got young DC it is better to travel separately, especially the first time leaving DC. Then if there is any kind of emergency and you need to be back, you aren't reliant on or ruining the trip for others.

fruitbrewhaha · 02/04/2025 11:01

Just meet them there, they won’t to get away early, you don’t it’s fine.

BIWI · 02/04/2025 11:00

Why not do the handover to the GP the night before?

And they aren’t unreasonable to suggest travelling separately, if this will allow you to do what you want.

DaisyChain505 · 02/04/2025 11:00

I can see it from both parties views however I side with your friends. I’m sure this weekend wasn’t cheap and they want to make the most of their time and not be hanging around waiting for you to do something that you could do a few hours earlier.

If you’re really set on doing hand over later on that’s your choice and you should just drive down yourself. Just because you have a baby doesn’t mean you get to dictate the rules.

You saying the room can’t be checked in until 3pm isn’t really a point to argue. You’re not going away just to sit in your room. You’ll be spending time together, exploring the hotel, surroundings and being social before you check into the room.

Them wanting to make the most of their weekend away and get there at a decent time isn’t being selfish or not thinking of your child. Gently, you need to realise that the world doesn’t start revolving around you just because you’ve had a baby. They’ve left you with the choice to do what suits you best, you can’t hold that against them.

Mrsttcno1 · 02/04/2025 10:59

I don’t see the issue really, it’s their weekend too, they aren’t forcing you to go early they are just stating that is their plans and you are welcome to join later, that feels like a good compromise?

Crunchymum · 02/04/2025 10:59

Can't you just meet them there? Why do you all need to travel together?

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