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Humiliated by work colleague about smelly toilet

85 replies

JadeyGreen · 01/04/2025 14:17

My workplace has a shared toilet - it’s outside the office in a corridor so people can’t see the comings and goings.

Anyway, I noticed this smelt really foul when I went in this morning (no big deal, it’s a toilet after all). As I walked out and opened the door, my colleague was waiting to go in.

A couple of minutes after, my colleague walked back into the office and announced ‘JadeyGreen, what on earth did you have for breakfast? it absolutely stinks in there’

I obviously protested my innocence -
but it was really humiliating in front of the c.15 colleagues who were in work today. We have quite serious roles and this isn’t the sort of comment people usually make.

AIBU to feel offended?

OP posts:
slimshady18 · 01/04/2025 15:05

BobbyBiscuits · 01/04/2025 14:27

Gawd that's horrid. Especially coming from a man?! If it was a female friend in a very light-hearted way I'd be the first to say 'oh, I'd give it five minutes'. If I was the culprit. But surely there's an freshener in there and adequate ventilation?

This kind of thing happened once when I was in hospital. Our bay had five people so the culprit could easily be identified you'd think.

Obviously everyone in hospital is constipated. The food, the drugs etc.

anyway, there was a turd bigger than my head in the bowl one day. I've never seen anything like it.

But as I was injured and needed a pish I just went anyway. Told the nurses it wasn't me...but it caused a scandal. Six nurses in there, I don't know how they got it down?! We were all in hysterics by that point. But no-one owned up. 🤣🤣🤢

What do you mean especially coming from a man? Op didn’t mention whether their colleague was male or female.

ByQuaintAzureWasp · 01/04/2025 14:48

I'd speak to him privately and tell him to desist with his humiliating comments

Tessiebear2023 · 01/04/2025 14:34

SharpLily · 01/04/2025 14:26

Yes, that was pretty awful. All I can say is that in my experience not everyone uses the same filter around these sorts of comments. My family pretended poo, toilets, periods or anything 'uncomfortable' just didn't exist. Certainly they were never spoken about. My husband's family were the exact opposite and it was considered perfectly normal to discuss each other's bowel habits even at the dinner table. It wouldn't have even occurred to them that this could be embarrassing for some people. I suspect you are working with someone with that kind of sensibility but I'm not sure what you can do about it. A retort as suggested above wouldn't bother them in the slightest.

My family are actually the second kind, being all boys (except me). However the "who did that!" jokes are very much a family thing, my boys would never make a comment like that at work, or to anyone outside of the household.

Stripeyanddotty · 01/04/2025 14:29

The op didn’t say if the colleague was a man or a woman.

Tessiebear2023 · 01/04/2025 14:28

If I heard someone make a comment like that it would reflect very badly on them, not the 'target' of the comment.
No.1 it's obviously very rude and shows poor manners to comment on a personal subject like that.
No.2 you should never cast aspersions on someone with absolutely no basis.

He's a badly brought up, petty arse. Hold your head up, and don't let him get you down. In fact, after work go out and buy yourself a treat, you deserve it 💐

BobbyBiscuits · 01/04/2025 14:27

Gawd that's horrid. Especially coming from a man?! If it was a female friend in a very light-hearted way I'd be the first to say 'oh, I'd give it five minutes'. If I was the culprit. But surely there's an freshener in there and adequate ventilation?

This kind of thing happened once when I was in hospital. Our bay had five people so the culprit could easily be identified you'd think.

Obviously everyone in hospital is constipated. The food, the drugs etc.

anyway, there was a turd bigger than my head in the bowl one day. I've never seen anything like it.

But as I was injured and needed a pish I just went anyway. Told the nurses it wasn't me...but it caused a scandal. Six nurses in there, I don't know how they got it down?! We were all in hysterics by that point. But no-one owned up. 🤣🤣🤢

SharpLily · 01/04/2025 14:26

Yes, that was pretty awful. All I can say is that in my experience not everyone uses the same filter around these sorts of comments. My family pretended poo, toilets, periods or anything 'uncomfortable' just didn't exist. Certainly they were never spoken about. My husband's family were the exact opposite and it was considered perfectly normal to discuss each other's bowel habits even at the dinner table. It wouldn't have even occurred to them that this could be embarrassing for some people. I suspect you are working with someone with that kind of sensibility but I'm not sure what you can do about it. A retort as suggested above wouldn't bother them in the slightest.

Chezxx · 01/04/2025 14:24

I absolutely would complain to HR.
That definitely is a shocking thing to say.

toomuchfaff · 01/04/2025 14:21

Best way to deal with a bully, turn it round.

"fine when I left it, whoever smelt it dealt it"

Also, just know they are a dick..

MyBusyBee · 01/04/2025 14:19

Yes. Very humiliating of him and not professional. I would contact your line manager about the drains and his comment - very belittling