Echolalia in toddler

I also recognise your posts and am going to be very clear and honest with you. I find your posts distressing.

I have an autistic daughter who is nearly four. She has a tiny handful of words. We have never had a professionals meeting for her which did not end with the professional quietly telling us that she is almost certainly autistic. She has been red flagged within the system many times for the level of her needs and yet, we still have not had our paediatrician review.

After 2 1/2 years on the waiting list we paid for a private diagnosis so that she will qualify for high needs funding when she starts school. She will start with an EHCP and will almost certainly have to be in a specialist resource base.

She is loved to bits and is our wild and lovely child. All we can do is accompany her through life, be proud and loving and work with her to achieve each new goal, however small that might seem to others.

I don't know what you think will happen or change if you can get your clearly strongly held concerns validated, but nothing will happen, nothing will change. You need to stop asking. Stop feeding the anxiety monster, get outside and let your daughter get on with becoming whoever she is meant to be, and then love the socks off her however that is.

You are too analytical about your child. Burn the books, stop researching online and go splash in some puddles with her!

This is another example of a damaging post.

She isn't a caring mum, or at least not in a healthy way. She's obsessed with her daughter being autistic. She's constantly watching for it, pushing for it, taking her to Dr's for it, discussing it.

If posters aren't aware of the op's posting history then they can make kind posts like this one without realizing they are legitimizing a damaging obsession.

I know there's an argument for telling the OP not to worry and that her child is fine ( autistic or not ) but the OP is not listening to most posts and latching onto validating ones.

I've reported this thread, I hope others will too...

I know it is not typical and I wish I knew how to help her

Help her with what though? She sounds fine. Many toddlers that age struggle to communicate and yours is managing fine. Stop looking for issues where there aren’t any and enjoy your child.

I say that as someone who has had 2 ND children, 1 who showed signs of ND from being a baby.

From what you’ve put in your OP and also being the parent of children with ASD (one diagnosed at 2.5) I wouldn’t be concerned at the moment at all. Sometimes you will see behaviour that as part of a bigger picture can be ASD related but in isolation can just be transient at a certain point in development. Please try not to worry.

If she is on spectrum, then normal part of thing.
It went away after a while.
Had him tested last month for SALT and his expressive scores, language structure, vocabulary and grammar are above average (he is 11).

edit: it doesn't sound like echolalia. That would be it's cold today (question) and child would repeat it.

I agree with this. The issue appears to be you. Not your child. Did you have anxiety before you became a mother? Why not listen to what people are telling you and get some help for yourself. It will benefit you AND your child. Good luck.

Which is exactly why you shouldn't post. It's feeding your obsession to the detriment of both your and your daughters wellbeing.

As they did on your previous thread, and the one before that, and the endless (at least once a month, since your child was 16 months from what I’ve seen) threads before that. On your last one you said you’d look at getting help for yourself now and less than a month later you’re back with the same list looking for the same answers. Others have said you sound like a good mum, but to be very harsh this isn’t good parenting. You recognise that your anxiety is out of control and yet you’re not doing anything about it - it will have an effect on your child. She may or may not be autistic, but this is borderline munchausen by proxy at this point. If she’s not autistic, what other conditions will you start obsessing about her having?

You sound like a really caring mum. Every kid is different whether they are neurodiverse or not. Lots of adults are now just realising they were neurodivergent kids but never knew, and were brought up without reference to it.
Just go with your instincts of what she likes, as you would with other kids.
Even typing this I know that answer would have been frustrating for me to hear too. But there really is no standard change, just be responsive. Gentle parenting (what it really is, not the misinformation) is perfect here.

I can say that my daughter was put through the diagnosis which started at 2.5 years of age but it was very very obvious.

Your daughter seems in a developmental range as all children reach milestones at different ages.

I have 4 children and what my oldest child did at 2.5 my youngest did at 18 months etc
All children develop at different rates.
My daughter was unable to say anything at all at the age you are worried about echolia.

She does sound exactly like her peers - as I and other professionals have told you.

Children are exploring how language works. It's a complex puzzle that doesn't always work the way they think it does. Think how often children say "I not do that" or "I seed the sheepses." They think they've learned how something works then overgeneralise it, then learn when the rule doesn't work.

We teach children that some phrases are repeated at certain points in the day.
Good morning
Yum yum
Sleep tight

Your daughter doesn't know why we say these over and over but that "It's empty" is a one-off observation. She has presumably used this phrase successfully as a conversation starter (She said it. You responded) and hasn't worked out that it isn't a habitual phrase. Adults do this all the time. (Doing anything this weekend? Turned out nice again.) And other adults recognise them as empty conversation starters and respond.

You cannot "know in your heart" that she is autistic. You may have suspicions. Noone else can see them. Use your head and evaluate the evidence.

Try to stop analysing her and enjoy her

And I doubt those posters recognise you from your dozens of other threads.
This is why a PP suggested you stop posting!! It’s not helpful. Nobody on here can tell you that your DD definitely has autism. In real life you have been told that she doesn’t warrant any concern but you keep posting over and over and over again until you find someone, anyone who says you might be right.
Would you feel happier if she was autistic?

My daughter was On the Autistic Spectrum and learned to speak using Echolalia and was quite obvious.

Her words/phrases/sentences sounded very cut and pasted together.
She used the same phrases and accents including body language and facial expression of the person who she used the phrase from.

Yet if you hadn’t known her you would think she was using her own words but she had a different style of speaking when using her words compared to the words she used that were copied.
Hers were very basic and more fluid and very simple
The echolia was stilted in her use and was generally more complex in words and phrases but she was absolutely unable to tell you what the words or phrases/sentences actually meant but you could absolutely say which person she had ‘lifted’ it from because any accent, tone etc was copied beautifully.

She had a habit in primary school of copying the head teacher when she was trying to talk. Complete with Scottish accent, head tilt and hands on the hips.

Chil all learn speech and words at a different rate and at that age seems in the usual range
I have 4 children and all have had a range of different abilities in speech.

Your basis of knowing she is on the spectrum is that she doesn't script or repeat TV shows? Most 2 year olds I know don't do this. It's very clear you have little understanding of language and development and you're taking things you read without any knowledge about them and using them as evidence something is "wrong" with your child.

I completely agree

It’s understandable why you are wondering about autism. My autistic DC had some similar presentations but female type autism wasn’t as well understood then. Traits tend to become clearer,if they are there, as kids get older. That’s why there is frequently a minimum age for assessment.
While not feeling listened to may be frustrating can you think about what a diagnosis at this very young age achieve? What would change for your child? I’d concentrate on having fun which suits you and your DC. It already sounds like you’re tuned in to preferences. Go with that. Enjoy yourselves. The rest will come in time.

It's because everything you say points to your daughter being a developmentally normal 2 year old.

You're just going to have to see how it goes, OP. Try not to be so anxious about missing something that you keep seeing stuff that isn't there.

Honestly at this stage, I am getting the impression that OP wants her daughter to have autism. She is absolutely obsessed with the idea no matter how many medical professionals or posts she gets telling her that her daughter is fine.
My DS didn’t have as wide a range of language at that age and he definitely isn’t autistic!

Is there any way mumsnet can stop this poster? It can't be helpful when the odd person validates her concern. She's clearly not able to take in the majority view that there's nothing wrong with her child, so I don't think the constant posting is helpful.

I feel desperately, desperately sorry for the daughter, who is constantly being told she's not developing normally.

Honestly I think we're nearing Munchsusens by proxy territory here. It's so sad to watch.