It's a CF one

Don’t invite her again!

There’s a reason “no is a complete sentence” is a mumsnet catchphrase. Why all the “maybe” and going along with plans they made? Stop letting people walk over you and avoid problems like these.

@Willowthewhip does CF have any redeeming qualities? Struggling to see why you bother with her at all 😂

I like “fuck no!” Short and to the point.

CFery can only exist as long as it’s enabled. I’ve voted that you are unreasonable as are friends with a known CF and have allowed this situation to happen. I feel sorry for your aunt being insulted in her own home, frankly.

She does sound a pita but as others have said you just need to be more assertiveness and stop letting her rule the roost.

If you'd expected £50 pp for a hamper and flowers for your Aunt you should have said so pre trip. If I'd stayed in a well off aunt's holiday home I'd have thought flowers from all for £40 total would have sufficed.

I don’t get it.

”Sorry, but my aunt only hosts family members,” could have nipped this in the bud.

CF does sound obnoxious.

I also voted YABU, for these reasons.

"acting like they're so tough" 🤣🤣🤣
I haven't seen anyone suggest they should have taken CF outside and beat her up!

Mockery aside, I think this is actually part of the problem. People (and we as a nation are very bad in particular) who hate confrontation so much that they can't deal with it normally and let things slide, or blow up completely out of proportion (often after letting things slide for weeks/months/years!, or when they're drunk) or bitch about that person behind their back and never do anything about it.

People don't seem to understand that there's a whole scale of confrontation. "standing up" to CF! doesn't have to entail shouting and rudeness and causing a scene, it can be a quiet word, a simple no, making a joke of things, etc.

Apart from anything else OP has since confirmed that they did stand up to CF several times, so it's clearly not unreasonable of so many posters to suggest they should have. The awkward part in "drawing the line" is that different things push different people's boundaries.

For example, as an introvert I would find it reasonable for the friend not to come on all the outings if she needed some time alone, and, while £5 is an absolute joke, have to say I'd also be a bit unhappy at £50 (which another poster suggested as an ok amount) - being sprung on me. That's a third of the cost they'd have paid as private guests - if it had been discussed before staying that they'd contribute a set amount, of course it's a more than reasonable charge and still a bargain, but as it was offered as a free holiday it could have come as a shock. However I would not have been able to stay quiet at being rude to the aunt or the sandwiches thing!

Whereas OP didn't find some of those examples bad enough to raise at the time but did call out other examples of cheeky fuckery.

Perhaps surprised was the wrong word. I suppose it’s more that I think of a perfect reply (polite but firm), unfortunately about 10 minutes later, by which time the CF has got her own way.

YABU for going along with something you knew you wouldn't enjoy.. the only person that MADE this happen, was you.

stop being so 'non committal' when someone asked you something and just say no.

I've spoken to her over and over and over again but she just can't bring herself to go against what people want. I think it's due to how her father has treated her 😕.

Same!
Show her these threads once she’s old enough to fully understand them. Then she can see some consequences to allowing it.

This.

No I didn’t say I don’t believe it’s real, that’s not what I meant. I completely believe it’s real as I’ve had a CF friend before who genuinely, truly believed everyone existed for her benefit and her use. I’ve also had people in my life like OP who allow these CF’s (and everyone else) to do/say anything and everything, in order to ‘keep the peace’ with seemingly no limit. My MIL is this person and would walk scorched earth in bare feet if it kept the peace. It’s irritating beyond belief as you never can trust her fully as she keeps things to herself if she determines it might cause even slight annoyance to someone around her.

Oh I always thought it was Complete! Every day's a school day.

So, would you go away with this person again, OP?

Cheeky Fcuker.

Oh I remember - Cheeky F.

Backing away slowly from the enraged wet lettuce...

Right, so you weren't too wet to put a stop to this but found it hilarious instead. Ok.

YANBU, but you can't force them to contribute, and I wouldn't expect it based on past behaviour. I wouldn't invite them to anything like this again and would let them know exactly why.

Same again!!

Then the aunt would be as much of a wet lettuce (albeit a kind one) as the OP

That’s because Mn is disproportionately full of people who struggle with relationships, are poor at communication (lurching between meek WL and eruption and going NC), and appear to live surrounded by ‘friends’ they dislike.

This OP already knew what this woman was like, and, as the person with the aunt who owned the house, was the one with all the power in the scenario. There was no need whatsoever for the weekend to even go ahead — she could have simply said there were no weekends when it wasn’t being used in the immediate future. No need for some kind of reality tv-style ‘calling out’.