talk to me if you stupidly bought something £££ you couldnt really afford

@Stoufer try to buy some posh fruit instead. £6 hurts on cherries but they are lovely. Cheaper than booze or fags. Add in plums, peaches, grapes.
I have given up booze so I treat myself.

If you actually read the posts on here, people are very much self-reflecting. Collectively. You don’t need to jump on me for having a different thought. I hope you continue to enjoy the thread.

Oh well, I’m not, I was just agreeing with someone else that it makes me think. Whether you think it’s boring or joyless, we will have to consider how we live at some point in the future, which is all I was saying.

It is allowed to broaden a discussion, not opposed to it at all. I suppose it was just another facet of the conversation. Life isn’t all sunshine and rainbows as we all know 🥹

I want to consider the planet so my children can grow old and be safe. There’s a positive thought!

i’ve only read up to page 11 so far, but am in agreement with a pp that it is one of the best / nicest threads on mn in many months.

I don’t have any tales of outrageously expensive single items - but I have been going through the process of trying to get my overstuffed house under control over the last 9 months or so, and what has really struck me is the probable total cost of all of the stuff and things (most of which are not used / hardly used) that we have accumulated over the years which I am now getting rid of with gusto.. it will be £000s... And what is worse is that this embedded cost is one of the reasons why I have not been able to get rid of things much before now. But I am doing a good job with the declutter, the house is much better, but still have half of the house to go through yet.

Other things that have occurred to me are that I stress eat (and have done for years), and I should probably have a sit down and work out what that has probably cost me over the last year, 10 years, 20 years, 30 years.. Probably a few horses, some bling and fancy togs would pale into comparison. Not to mention the health impacts on being a stress eater. So maybe if I could wind the clock back, it would have been better / healthier for me to visit Aspreys or Tiffany’s to get a feel-good fix all those years ago.

And I’ve never been a smoker, but smoking one pack of 20 a day would cost roughly £6k per year (not to mention all of the health costs)… That would equate to OP’s lovely shoes every two months? Or PP’s cutlery in just over three years…?

Sending lots of love to all those dealing with bereavement, in whatever way they find best.. it has been 3 months since my bereavement.. and from now on I am going to try and make healthier choices for my stress-spending..

Pretty sure that using the phrase 'collective self reflection' will suck every ounce of joy out of a thread.

Yes, but its managed and considered. And based in income that we know is coming in to pay stuff off. We have periods of head down and working and limited spending too. Have property and pensions so not bothered about saving more than that.
Weve seen loved ones who saved for retirement having it cut short when they passed, or not being able to do the things they have saved for because of illness so we are a bit like, do it now, why wait.

I agree, I’m not saying it’s everything, I was talking more society on a wider scale, not the things here. It’s just a poignant conversation, I’m not being judgey. If anything, many of the things mentioned aren’t even things, and/or they are things which have been long kept and enjoyed and cared for which is ideal, not like throwaway culture. I was including myself in it. When I said we will have to think about it one day… I was referring to the climate crisis and the fact that one day things will inevitably have to change somehow. I’m not judging anyone, and I also agree it’s each person’s own choice. It’s interesting the individual things we all do choose. But it is a good thought to provoke in our worrying modern times, just a bit of collective self-reflection.

Recently, I spent WAY too much on my husband’s present for our 25th wedding anniversary. I’m hoping he will be so pleased with it he won’t wonder about the price.

I found out it had been discontinued, so it took a lot of detective work (scouring eBay, Gumtree, Vinted Facebook Marketplace etc.) …..to find the same in good condition, for a sane-ish (under £20k) price, willing to post to the top end of Scotland.

I did find someone who would personalise the map with something like an anniversary message and/or a location but that was for an insane price.

Are you in a lot of debt if you don't mind me asking?

I'm also searching for chandelier type earrings because they're so much fun to wear when you've got super short hair and you've popped to the shops in jeans and a t-shirt and big glittery earrings for shits and giggles!

The goddesses of "stupidly buy those things you were having a bit of think about, sloth laydee!" love me tonight, like they SERIOUSLY love me. I've put in the most basic of google searches and immediate gold!

Example. I said earlier that I wanted to look up some maybe silk, but sort of "luxury" - not luxury at all really but definitely natural fibres and maybe looking a bit Victorian to go with my aesthetic (excuse me while I vomit after writing that sentence). My search: luxury nightwear. I wasn't even trying. One of the first hits:
Vintage-inspired floral and traditional Victorian nightwear made from 100% cotton. Ladies nightdresses, nightshirts, pyjamas, accessories and dressing gowns.
I go to have a look. Really lovely pieces, at really reasonable prices. Will I get something from there? Definitely!
My velvet throw search was literally that "velvet throw" and there's more of a mixed bag but lots and lots of really just lovely pieces that I'll buy a couple of for sure. Also, there's a cashmere blanket for sale on H&M that I'll slip in to the mix. Maybe. Such small things and pleasures but when stuff sort of gently falls into place around you it does feel as though life is on your side and that's quite a nice feeling.

An expensive running machine. I probably ran 20k on it in a year. It laughed at me every time I passed it; the guilt was eating me up. Then I sold it and my guilt disappeared immediately.

I had to put away my large HP castle due to lack of space. So obviously I bought Rivendell and then the Dark Tower.
So now I have spent well over 1k on Lego I actually have no space to display.
Still don’t regret it though.

Can you get to Edinburgh zoo? You could feed all three!

That's for each individual to decide.

Some have said it fills a hole after a loss,
Some purchases have lasted years, so not a waste.
Some will be passed on for generations to come etc.
A lot end up in charity shops/donations.

Experiences, animals, temporary relief or whatever, their money, their choice.

I'm not sure that applies so much to a lot of the things, as if you're splurging money you're probably buying good quality and it lasts. A lot of people have talked about their super-expensive shoes, dress, artwork, bag... or cutlery! - lasting a long time and being treasured. That's what we should be doing with stuff - buying quality that is worth having and lasts. It's the opposite of throwaway, plastic tat culture. And these things can be sold on and keep their value as well.

I love them, @Katem90 ! It's everything that's wrong with us and everything that I can convince myself is right about us because it's not hurting anyone, it's sweet, funny and I would totally eat my chips using it like some la-di-da lady who is all out of fucks to give and still loving every fuckless second!

@ReturnoftheBink I'm going to be feeding the capybara at a sort of children's farm/small zoo place near Epsom and I know that they have branches in West London too so it's worth starting to look by Googling Epsom/capybara. Probably. Because these are being bought for me as presents I'm not 100% on the details. The sloths are, I'm 99% sure, at Drusilla's Park in Sussex who also do capybara and beaver.

I had a lambskin gilet made for me it cost £400 🙄 and this was in Brick Lane about 2003

was the hight of my boho phase

It looked great but it smelt horrible I only wore it a few times

This can be the new Mumsnet scarf. We can all go and hang about at the seaside eating fish and chips with our silver chip fork.

£150 for Dcat - he’s not 2 yet and has run up nearly £10k in vet bills - thankfully insured so only had to pay the excess
My weaknesses are jewellery and designer shoes - for either celebration or commiseration!

Definitely not the horse or all the experiences! Great ways to spend money I think. Animals ❤️ and time.

It’s acquiring tons of STUFF that we will all one day have to have a good think about! We’re all guilty of it!

I agree with you, we’ve all been conditioned to think we “need” things / something / anything to feel better / be better / perform better / have more status. So we do it. It’s interesting to talk about and discuss people’s various choices, and this is a fair point to make. At some point we will all have to really reassess how we live, I’m sure.

Wait, what? I missed about feeding capybaras. Where can one do that? I paid to feed a rhino and zebra and a cassowary (sp?). That was well worth it.

Thanks, it does help to hear that. I guess you never know how any dog will be. We were so lucky with the last one we weren’t prepared 😂 This one is very sweet with anyone she trusts. And not aggressive really, but very nervous. Every day is an adventure!