To not be bothered if son likes football

I would just say that you're waiting to see who your child is and what his likes/dislikes will be. If he enjoys football you'll let him play, if he doesn't then he doesn't have to, simple. That's been my approach to everything hobby-wise aside from swimming lessons, which weren't optional.

Exactly this.

It can be a social glue, but it's not for everyone. DH has a bit of avchip on his shoulder about this as he feels he missed out by not being encouraged in it and when DS was little he talked about how he ought to get him into because it was socially important, but he never actually did anything about it.

Then he'd occasionally get all upset he didn't do it when he worried about DS socially and he'd go 'Oh we should have got him info football he'd have had more friends'.but the fact was he had enough friends, he wasn't very physical or coordinated (adhd it turned out) and I kept saying to DH that a) I don't think he'd ever have been into it and b) it was never going to work unless you were genuinely into it and could convey excitement about it and be prepared to kick around with him regularly and pick a premiership team and watch their matches week in week out each season, which was never going to happen.

Honestly, ds (now 13) has his video games and geek stuff and has his friends, it's fine!

None of my 3 boys like football and it hasn’t affected their lives
Plenty of grown men aren’t into it, it’s a very outdated concept

@rosedahlialily my eldest played football until the age of 10, was great at ball control, but not aggressive enough to tackle well. He was tall, so ended up in goal, which was less fun. My number 2 decided at age 6 that he knew everything there was to know about football, and didn't need to go to any more training. In both cases, we just focussed on other sports - karate, basketball, swimming, running and finally found one that they both loved and have stuck with into adulthood. I won't say what it is as they both ended up as England juniors, and one of them still plays internationally as an adult. My advice is, if you want your son to play for England, they stand a much better chance if they choose a sport that isn't football. 😁

There's an assumption that boys will be interested in football and it's rooted in an archetype, because many are. I had a football loving DF, was at school with a load of little boys who all supported one or other of the two big Manchester clubs, and I bonded with my then boyfriend (now DH) over how bored we were by football. (His DF was completely different to mine.) But interestingly, the footie-fanatic I know who's gone furthest has made it big in the American ladies' game. Many years ago, she was the little girl who lived next door!

Because football is a national pastime and they are excited at the prospect that your son might be good at it. Would you be bothered if they were tennis fans and were speculating that he might be the next Roger Federer?

There is a stereotype of boys loving football, but this stereotype is rooted in reality. Many boys love football.

Some families are just very into football.

My parents were never into football but they both came from ‘football families’. My brother caught the bug and was obsessed from the age of 2 or 3 despite no encouragement from my parents. He now works in a very football-related field.

Conversely, DS(6) could not give a shit about football. He has not interest in playing with a ball or watching it on tv. I honestly don’t even really know if he is aware that football is a ‘thing’ besides a game that some of the other kids play at school.

Why? It's far and away the most popular sport, both in terms of participation and viewing numbers. Of course more people are going to ask about it than other sports.

There is asmall part of me glad I didn't have boys as my observation is that football is the unhealthiest of all children's activities. It should be fun but ruined by over obsessive adults. Other sports get them to a lesser extent, but football sends some people crazy.

Just follow your sons interests. He might enjoy toddler football.... or he might enjoy Gymnastics or rugby tots or swimming or a music class. Then as he's older, maybe he will be inspired by Billy Elliot or want to be England Goalie. He's not even born yet, you can't know where his interests will lie.

If he does get into field sports, invest in warm boots and good thermals!

(One of my girls is into climbing, musical theatre and Scouts, the other plays rugby and Scouts).

Fair enough.

I still don’t reality see the harm though. If he ends up loving football then great, and if it turns out he’s not bothered about it then no harm done.

I bet they’d buy a girl their team’s football kit though. It’s just a bit of fun.

Yeah, totally understand. I don’t like the subtext behind it either, but then it’s picking your battles, as realistically they’ll have little to no say. If, once he’s actually here, he likes ballet - for example - and they start trying to push him towards football, then that’s an issue at that point for the reasons you’ve set out and I would be saying something so he doesn’t absorb that thinking as he grows up. Me, personally, right now I’d leave them with it. Or just teasingly say “Well, you never know! Might be a ballerina instead!” 😉

Yes, I’m sure that it’s not the case at every school.

I doubt anyone’s going to be genuinely disappointed if he doesn’t like football.

You can enjoy both. My nephew enjoys football, chess and going to the library.

Nothing as long as there is no coercion and/or disappointment if someone chooses a different sport or to follow a different team.
I am sure its not the same at every school but DS and his friends were not keen on the "football boys" at his school as they weren't the nicest or most inclusive

I have a very low tolerance of grandparental disappointment. PIL were given to understand before DS2 was born that no DC of mine will ever be a disappointment and would not spend much time with anyone who was ‘disappointed’ . In our case the issue was the sex of the baby - but I would have done the same with football mad grandparents.

‘…comments around how football is the best thing you can get a little boy into, will he support X team etc.’

I agree with them because my sons both love football. We have a really good youth team locally, both my ds’s joined at age 5 and played until they were 16. Training once a week and matches every Saturday during the football season and my youngest also played in the Sunday team. It was good for them in numerous ways but had they not enjoyed if, it wouldn’t have been forced on them.

They can push all they like - but a child’s parents are the people who decide what activities a child will try and when. No one else. I’d have great fun pushing back to be honest. Tell them he’ll be spending hours in the library/playing chess/learning guitar/gardening.

Neither of mine were that interested in football. And we live in Liverpool…

Meant to say GPs are all disappointed as they are football people.

I've got 3 boys and none are interested in football. All have done various sports clubs and I've offered football but they were never bothered. They tend not to play at lunchtime at school either as I think the kids who do are very into it. DH does watch a match occasionally but they never want to join him and he only really watches the big matches anyway.