Page 25 | Husband getting married

Grassisalotgreener · 2025-03-30T14:53:04+00:00

Separated 13 years, no contact since children came of age, separated as a result of dv. I was informed today that he is getting Married next week . Should i inform someone in authority? Aibu if i report him, i was delighted when he moved on so not upset he is getting married,but im astounded because we are not divorced!

sheknowsitstoolate · 30/03/2025 16:41

If the kids are going, get them to say “but you’re still married to mum”

Kandalama · 30/03/2025 16:40

Grassisalotgreener · 30/03/2025 16:38

That is what i was thinking because you wouldnt go ahead with a marriage witbout getting a divorce, would you? 🤔

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Some people do though.

jewelcase · 30/03/2025 16:39

This is the perfect opportunity to speak up at the ‘If anyone here present knows of any legal impediment…’ bit of a wedding. And you’re all liars if you say that’s not too good an opportunity to pass up.

Original poster

Grassisalotgreener · 30/03/2025 16:38

Ooorhead · 30/03/2025 16:35

Ah yes that will be it

it will be a humanist ceremony or similar

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That is what i was thinking because you wouldnt go ahead with a marriage witbout getting a divorce, would you? 🤔

OP posts:

Keepingthingsinteresting · 30/03/2025 16:38

Ooorhead · 30/03/2025 16:35

Ah yes that will be it

it will be a humanist ceremony or similar

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A humanist ceremony doesn’t mean it isn’t legal, just not religious.

Dob him in @Grassisalotgreener . Do you know where he is getting married, you can report to the local authority/register office maybe, or if on a church to the vicar there.

Kandalama · 30/03/2025 16:37

Grassisalotgreener · 30/03/2025 16:35

They do now!

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Have your children said anything to him

2025willbemytime · 30/03/2025 16:37

I can't believe a poster thought by going no contact with a spouse it would mean you're not married anymore.

Definitely ring a solicitor tomorrow and ask where you stand with all this. If you know where they are "getting married" ring the venue as well.

Ooorhead · 30/03/2025 16:35

Unless he’s as thick as shit
this will be a commitment ceremony or similar

don’t waste time navel gazing op

Ooorhead · 30/03/2025 16:35

Grassisalotgreener · 30/03/2025 16:05

He is getting married next week and i have had no divorce papers, im informed that you have to notify authorities 3 months in advance, so that doesnt add up.
Unless it is a non legal promise type of thing, yeah i feel sorry for the lady in question , because we are 100 % still married.

Ah yes that will be it

it will be a humanist ceremony or similar

Original poster

Grassisalotgreener · 30/03/2025 16:35

Doingmybestbut · 30/03/2025 16:32

Do your children know you’re still married?

They do now!

OP posts:

Ooorhead · 30/03/2025 16:34

Grassisalotgreener · 30/03/2025 16:05

He is getting married next week and i have had no divorce papers, im informed that you have to notify authorities 3 months in advance, so that doesnt add up.
Unless it is a non legal promise type of thing, yeah i feel sorry for the lady in question , because we are 100 % still married.

So a very last minute wedding and your children have only just been invited?

ApolloandDaphne · 30/03/2025 16:34

As much as it would seem like pay back to let him get married then report him it really wouldn't be fair on the person he is marrying. I would either tell your DC if they are adults and suggest they let him know that he is actually not divorced and not at liberty to remarry or try and get hold of the person who will be marrying them (registrar or clergy) to let them know.

ibe · 30/03/2025 16:34

Nosaucelikemintsauce · 30/03/2025 16:09

Obviously you do nothing until after The Big Day. He hasn't committed a crime yet.
Then report and enjoy.....

Absolutely this! 👆🏽

TimeForATerf · 30/03/2025 16:34

If the kids know where he’s getting married then you should be able to easily find out if it’s approved for “proper” legal weddings or just some place with a celebrant giving some nice service but not a legal marriage.

HundredPercentUnsure · 30/03/2025 16:33

Nosaucelikemintsauce · 30/03/2025 16:09

Obviously you do nothing until after The Big Day. He hasn't committed a crime yet.
Then report and enjoy.....

Oh please do this. And then come back and update us 😂

Doingmybestbut · 30/03/2025 16:32

Do your children know you’re still married?

Mangolover123 · 30/03/2025 16:32

I would wait until after the wedding. Get the details then report to the police.

Offtobuttonmoontovisitmrspoon · 30/03/2025 16:31

Do the children know that you are still married?

would wait and see what he does next.

Original poster

Grassisalotgreener · 30/03/2025 16:31

SeaBaseAlpha · 30/03/2025 16:10

Please tell me you have a valid will in place…

I have it was the first thing i did after separation, it was very expensive to sort the trauma of the dv and raise my children. I prioritised and divorce was not an option at that time, cannot say too much but i am tied to him financially through some archaic rule and i didnt and dont have the funds to divorce him.

OP posts:

FondantFancyFan · 30/03/2025 16:30

You can report bigamy to the police on the non emergency number as it is a crime
This is what I would do so he can't lie to his fiance when they turn up at his door asking questions.

https://www.westyorkshire.police.uk/ask-the-police/question/Q742#:~:text=If%20you%20suspect%20a%20person,non%2Demergency%20number%3A%20101.

Also, find out the venue and contact the registry office of that area & inform them that he is legally married.

forgotmyusername1 · 30/03/2025 16:29

If you are one for dramatics you could recreate the vicar of Dibley scene

'I object, the groom is already married... to me'

EwwSprouts · 30/03/2025 16:29

Grassisalotgreener · 30/03/2025 16:15

How do i reply to specific questions please?

Click on quote under the post you want to answer. Then you get a box as usual to type your response in.

L0bstersLass · 30/03/2025 16:28

gottakeeponmoving · 30/03/2025 16:25

No crime has been committed yet. If the marriage goes ahead and it is ‘real marriage’ with an official registrar present as opposed to a making promises under a flowery arch in a field type thing then yes you should absolutely report it.

Your children can find out more on the day.
Until then there is nothing to report.

I agree with this.
Also @Grassisalotgreener do you have a copy of your Marriage Certificate?

gottakeeponmoving · 30/03/2025 16:28

Grassisalotgreener · 30/03/2025 16:15

How do i reply to specific questions please?

By clicking on the quote button in the post you want to respond to.

gottakeeponmoving · 30/03/2025 16:25

No crime has been committed yet. If the marriage goes ahead and it is ‘real marriage’ with an official registrar present as opposed to a making promises under a flowery arch in a field type thing then yes you should absolutely report it.

Your children can find out more on the day.
Until then there is nothing to report.