Why is the go to mother of bride outfit a hideous stiff coat dress with hat?

Oh the image doesn’t show up, but google the middletons at the royal wedding. Classic example of the look op is talking about but done well. CM would have looked too informal without the coat.

I am so glad my MoG outfit was from a British Designer having read the op's comments. I'll find the Web picture of it if I can, the op will hate it but I've worn the tunic several times since with trousers and the frock for a few black tie dinners. I'm a great supporter of rewearing.

I also think some of it is a hangover from when men all wore morning suits- dress + coat is a way of approximating the same level of formality without looking like you’re wearing an evening dress (see for example the Middletons here). But these days most men don’t wear morning suits.

My Mum has worn lovely dresses to all our weddings and wouldn't be seen dead in something that frumpy.

To be fair you’ve picked two especially fugly outfits. The first more granny of the bride, and the second, nice for a formal evening event but not particularly weddingy.

Most MOB in the UK will be hedging their bets weather wise, so layered outfits are a good choice. There was a good choice of smart, chic outfits when I was shopping for DS’s wedding and I was very with the sleeveless shift dress with short jacket combo I chose.

Where I do agree with you, is that if you are fifty and short, a midi dress is never going to do you any favours.

OP just stop googling motb dresses and talking to wedding stylists. A motb can wear anything- it doesn’t have to be labelled motb.

A bolero jacket is the ultimate awful jacket that’s sold with shift dresses. Really should be avoided. Some women like overblown glamorous and others are quietly stylish. There are very decent London shops and designers for this type of occasion. Lalage Beaumont has traditional clothes in expensive fabrics. Self portrait and Rixo are good shouts too. Depends on what style suits mum.

I'm not being defensive, I don't like the traditional motb look myself. But I did find your comment about people being different ironic!

A wedding tradition may seem odd or outdated to one group of people but completely normal to another.

I think as a previous poster said, the issue is probably more with the stylist not listening to your brief.

I was early 40s when my DD married and I wore a beautiful summer dress with light shawl. Not what I picture as MOTB dress, but I asked for help in the fancy store as I didn't have a clue and aren't confident with that sort of thing. That's what they suggested and they should know. There's no need to wear the frumpy stuff. I'd want to be at least 20 years older to even consider some of those dresses.

I don't understand why you'd go to a stylist when you have such a clear idea of what you do and don't want. You don't need a stylist if you know what you want. Also the idea of you dressing your mum up is weird to me but as long as she's on board with that it's your circus I guess

This seems a weird post.

You seem to be dragging British people down and saying we’re not stylish.

You can literally order any dress for your mother you so wish. Everyone where’s different outfits . The reason the specific wedding shop had these outfits is that’s what they stock and are seen as traditional (although I don’t think many wear them) , normal dresses like your second photo can be bought anywhere.

Ditch the stylist and do your own thing. When my mum was MOB at a summer wedding she wore a beautiful slim fitted yellow dress and she looked, and felt, incredible.

I just googled MOTB dresses, nothing like the first picture came up. There are some fabulous dresses and outfits out there. I didn't wear anything like that dress and jacket to either of my children's weddings, and none of my friends did either. So, it's not a British thing, and we are just as stylish as any one else!

Yes, yes they are. They like different styles of clothes too 😉

I’ve seen those MOB outfits in shops, but I don’t know who’s buying them. I’m at the age where I’m at a wedding every other month at the moment, and I haven’t seen anyone wearing one!

OP I think you are annoyed with the service you received.
I can't remember seeing any mothers of the bride dressed like in the first picture at any of the weddings in the UK where I've been a guest.
You were unfortunate in having received the wrong service.
Your mother doesn't have to fit in with a perceived local style. It's not even a common style in my experience.
Most stylish women in any country are perfectly capable of choosing their own outfit. Your mother will look fantastic. She doesn't need to follow the local custom because it doesn't actually exist. Certainly not in the way your google findings suggest.
Forget all that and let your mother choose herself. Veto if you must, but I suspect she knows what to do.
What you might need is suggestions for UK shops selling beautiful dresses.
Style & Beauty board is the place for that.

I think the problem is historic.

MOB would wear her best dress, coat and hat, back when going out without a hat was unthinkable. My grandmother (would be 109 if she was alive now) would never be seen out with a hat. And then it was hat for church, so Sunday best was wedding wear and its kind of hung on.

To the point where now the idea is that dress, coat, hat is the wedding standard for MOB and no one seems to have moved on from that

The coat aspect covers up flab. A shawl does this as well but not as effectively as the coat dress cover up.

I'm struggling with the concept of 'dressing' your mother. My fiesty little mam would have never gone for that. She looked stylish at all her kid's weddings all by herself!