Mothers day

How did it go, @InBedBy10?

It very clearly does exist.

I am really dreading tomorrow, 2 teens (one is Autistic) who won't make any effort at all and younger children who don't know..I was a bit hurt inside that they didn't even make cards at school 🥲
I'll be on my own with them dealing with everyone's shit as per usual.
I'm super skint until payday on Tues too so can't even treat us to a take away and myself a bottle of wine, as that was my original plan.
I know people say to avoid social media on these days but ill probably have a little look and will feel a bit hurt that I'm not a mum getting spoilt for the day.. sigh.

Hope all that doesn't sound too negative but would just love ONE day where I get at least a cup of tea made for me... 😌

When my stepchildren (we're both women) were younger, I made sure that their mum got a present and card on mother's day from them.
When they went to university one year apart, I reminded them, asked if they were coming home for the weekend etc. Figured they were old enough to organise a card between them. My partner's upset when neither child appeared and nothing arrived in eldest's 2nd year at uni was awful to witness. I get that they have boyfriend's mums to factor in, plus their dad's new wife, but they are totally selfish and take their mum for granted.
Now they work, I still remind them, ask if they would like to come for lunch etc, but not much I can do. I take my partner for lunch, but she really wants her children to acknowledge her. It really hurts that they don't.

Many countries and cultures honour their parents or elders on certain days/ festivals without Hallmark; I don't think Mother's Day is simply because of card-makers. It's a good opportunity to discuss and model showing appreciation for those who do things for you. I think the OP is doing the right thing by setting expectations.

🖕

Fucking hell, there's some extremely bitter people on here.
I will celebrate Mother's Day with my Mum, Dad, husband, and siblings tomorrow. I've got cards and gifts for my Mum and my sisters. Not 'pandering', just an opportunity to show my love and appreciation, and to do so in a fantastic restaurant.

I don't need a specific date to appreciate my Mother. Or my Father, or husband, or siblings, or my amazing uncle. But it's nice to have a day to really celebrate someone important, so I love it.

I'm really not bothered about presents and cards, my kids will sometimes surprise me with a treat throughout the year (middle son brought me some crisps and a dip that he knows I love the other day) or they will treat me to lunch. I will pop and see my mum tomorrow and I've bought her a houseplant but she's not bothered about gifts either, she'd rather just spend time with me and her grandchildren. I do think Mother's Day has got ridiculous and commercialised - when I was a kid most mothers got a homemade card and that was it!

I don't really care if other places have Mother's Day in May. We have it in March, thanks, depending when Easter falls.

Mothering Sunday starts to become Mothers Day from the very early 1900s onwards, culture is always shifting and evolving and it was part of this.

Hallmark Brothers Inc was founded in 1923, after that shift had already begun.

Why so bitter?

How do you know I’m pandering? I buy my mother presents and celebrate her on that day because I want to. It’s lovely and I have some very fond memories of childhood Mothers Days. No pandering here.

I have also given my son 'present training' from about the age of 10.
Not just for mothers day and not just for me.
He's 21 this year. The last three years or so I've left him to his own devices. I have a collection of 'interesting ' presents all gratefully received, a few really thoughtful things which have actually made me cry. He's still useless at wrapping.
He is away at uni. I haven't had a card but I have had a beautifully packaged gift which shows me that he's really thought about me and what's going on in my life at the moment.
He has ASD and finds this stuff quite hard so I'm thrilled.
I'm taking this as a good indicator that he will be appreciative of his future partner.

Still a long way to go on housework though!!

What do you mean by “doesn’t exist”?

It’s not some physical thing that is present in other countries but not here. It’s a day that people give presents to their mothers if they want - how does that not exist? I personally don’t do anything for Mother’s Day, but to claim it doesn’t exist just because it has a different origin doesn’t make any sense

Pandering to your mother just because hallmark wants to make money.

I didn't need a specific date to appreciate my mother.

It still is Mothering Sunday and was a tradition for domestic servants to visit their own church with their family especially mothers.
You don’t have to be religious to celebrate a festival held every year in your own country, it’s been known as Mother’s Day for a long time.

Of course it ‘exists’ 😂

It’s obviously changed meaning from what it originally was to how it looks today; But it’s celebrated by millions of people in the UK just as other smaller commercialised holidays (eg Fathers Day, Valentines Day) are.

I always tell my 3 that I’m their Mum everyday and I don’t need thanking
Having said that, I have just had a box delivered from Moonpig.
DS1 didn’t even realise, so I think DS2 and DP. It matters to them so I’m grateful.

Why not? Some people enjoy “stupid greeting card holidays”. Myself included. Incidentally, what makes it stupid?

Exactly. Mothering Sunday is always the 4th Sunday in Lent where you return to your mother church where you were raised and originally worshipped.

It isn't a stupid greeting card holiday and shouldnt have been turned into one.

I rather think you need to get a life. Is the one you’re currently living pleasant? Spending time being rude to strangers on the internet for wanting a nice Mother’s Day?

Are you religious?
Since Mother's Day actually does not exist in the UK.
It was previously Mothering Sunday, when people went back to the church, where they originally worshipped.
Mother's Day does exist in much of the world, but it often at the beginning of May.

That sounds very very cute.

Did you not give your mum gifts/card on Mother’s Day as a child?

I've decided its down to me to teach them how to show that appreciation

I've given exactly this advice on another thread today (and hope the OP takes it).

You really need to not be so rude!!

I agree, it is an honour and privilege to be their Mother, but I don't think its too much to ask that our DC take one day a year to let their Mum know how much they love and appreciate them and how special they are.

And yes, a thanks IS sometimes required and recognition for the sacrifices and unconditional love that a Mum provides.

Not much to ask for the DC to get a card and some chocolates if its important to the OP which it obviously it. She is not being ridiculous at all.