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AIBU?

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New house - who gets biggest room?

335 replies

Catseyes2025 · 29/03/2025 09:14

So in the process of buying a new house with my partner. I have three children and he has one. The new house has 4 bedrooms. 2 good size and 2 smaller. He wants his daughter to have the second biggest room. She does not live with us full time, she lives with her mum. I don’t feel this is fair as my two youngest will have to share a room and now it looks like they will have to share a smaller room. This is totally grating me. He won’t budge on this as he says he’s promised her this room because she wanted it. I will be honest his daughter rarely gets told no. I guess it’s the joy of being an only child. I’ve really struggled with this as she has become quite entitled and really can’t handle if she doesn’t get her own way.
I literally don’t know how to handle this and tbh I’m dreading having to live with her - any advice would be greatly appreciated

OP posts:
takealettermsjones · 29/03/2025 09:18

Don't buy a house with him.

I know that sounds facetious but if you're buying a property together and blending your families, he doesn't get to "not budge" on something that needs to be a joint decision. It's a dangerous precedent to set and a very bad start, in my opinion. I'd at least postpone the house buying because his attitude would worry me.

FortyElephants · 29/03/2025 09:17

Clearly not! What an idiot. Are you sure about moving in with him?

Livelaughlurgy · 29/03/2025 09:17

If he's paying more and the logic is he who pays picks the tune then that will apply to every aspect of your life.

Frostykitty · 29/03/2025 09:17

Do you really want to go ahead with this? I'd be reconsidering the whole plan tbh.

Gabrilla · 29/03/2025 09:17

If you’re already dreading it, don’t do it.

Choose a bigger house or just stay living separately.

TeenToTwenties · 29/03/2025 09:17

It is crazy if a child who is only there sometimes has a larger room than 2 more there children who share a room.

The 2 sharing obviously should have the second biggest room.

MasterBeth · 29/03/2025 09:16

Of course two children sharing should have a larger room than one child on their own.

Staceysmum2025 · 29/03/2025 09:16

Who’s paying what because that is going to have an enormous influence on what happens in your household and if you’re not comfortable with it I’d be pulling out now

Nosaucelikemintsauce · 29/03/2025 09:16

The dc who live there full time get more space.

You don't have to live with her....
Just saying..... A dc who won't be told no will make your dc's lives hell..

TeenLifeMum · 29/03/2025 09:16

Absolutely not, after the master, the biggest room goes to those sharing (even if his dd lived there 100% of the time). What’s his rationale?