Different wedding invites for bridesmaids partner

I couldn’t get worked up by it saying as she hasn’t met your DP. I don’t think you need to overanalyse your friendship or anything (I mean she’s friends with you and valued you enough to be bridesmaid, she’s never met your partner). Be nice if she could have invited him but weddings are expensive and she probably has got closer friends she’s had to choose over him.
Either you go with your partner and enjoy the evening and he can relax during the day or you go alone and celebrate your friends marriage.

This. If I were him I’d happily spend the day pottering about and just go in the evening.

We had no +1 for our wedding unless we knew the +1
Its up to the wedding couple really, but its probably best that your partner not come at all or spend the day in the hotel and/or surrounding area and just join you in the evening if thats legistically possible.

This all smacks of an event wedding that the couple can't really afford. If you can't afford it for all your guests, you can't afford it.
I don't get this attitude either. Maybe they can't afford to invite people they've never met to the reception. Fair enough. So they are extending an additional invitation they don't need to to the evening. Why is it better to just not invite him at all? Or to invite him in place of someone they actually know? Or have a wedding at a cheaper venue so they can include people they've never met? It's bizarre.

In this case I disagree. She has asked her friend to be a bridesmaid. She is travelling and will have to stay overnight somewhere remote the least she could do is invite her partner.

What is the point in inviting him anyway if he has to find somewhere else to eat half way through the day? If it was in the middle of a city that is doable less so in the venue OP described

I understand about cutting costs but the bride should have made this clear when she asked OP to be bridesmaid then she could have made her decision based on that

'I don’t think the bride and groom have done anything wrong in not inviting someone they haven’t met'

But it really is social etiquette to invite partners of friends even if you havent met. Particularly if they are your bridesmaid .

I'd go alone op. What a shame though, they book these in the sticks venues then expect folk to twiddle their thumbs for hours until they're allowed in. Rude.

I would never have done this especially with you being a bridesmaid. Did she give any further explanation when you questioned it?

In this situation where he doesn’t know the couple as the bride I would have asked you what he’d prefer because if he attends the whole day he’d be on his own as you’ll have bridesmaid duties. To me it makes sense for him to come along in the evening unless he does know some mutual friends.

A partner of three years to a bridesmaid gets a full invitation imo. Personally I think partial invitations of guests of tiered importance are discourteous.

Evening invitations for work colleagues or neighbours/staff are fine although I don't entirely agree with a separate evening do.

This all smacks of an event wedding that the couple can't really afford. If you can't afford it for all your guests, you can't afford it.

Sounds like you want him there as your driver...

You will be busy on the day ...he would be stuck on his own with a bunch of strangers inviting him to the night do seems entirely reasonable

I’d decline the invitation in its entirely for both of you.

I wouldn’t make a fuss over it, but anyone I was close enough to to have as a bridesmaid, I’d invite their long term partner to the whole day.

I'd go. As a partner I'd be gapoy to mooch around a bit in-between, the day is about you as bridesmaid. Ad your partner I'd want to meet your friends. It nay be if someone gives backword he can bump up to the main meal.

Agreed. For many ot would be an opportunity to meet him, but I know some are quite precious about not having people they haven't met before at their wedding regardless of their standing in the lives of those close to them.

Not the end of the world for them not to invite him, so I would just go alone if he isn't happy to tag along under their conditions.

Is it a particularly treacherous drive/journey?

Would your partner know anyone else at the wedding?

This would be my take too. If I were him I'd travel down, find something to do (sightseeing, shopping, museum, whatever) during the day then go and join the party for the evening do

Your friend hasn't met him, numbers are tricky at weddings and you'll likely be busy with bmaid duties? It'd be a nice gesture for her to invite him but mightve made things difficult (&expensive!) However no obligation for her to.

Why do couples have to be joined at the hip?

I don't get the invite someone to one part and not others but there are women who can't be away from their partner at all and is equally odd

I think it's odd to invite a couple to different parts of the wedding day. Surely it's normal to invite your bridesmaid's partner to accompany her on the full day? But then, if you're close enough to be asked to be bridesmaid, it's a bit odd that she hasn't met your partner in 3 years!

Would you partner really want to sit through a ceremony of two people he doesn’t know get married, then the whole hanging around after for pictures and such? He would be left with strangers as everyone else were doing all the usual wedding party bits, surely an afternoon chilling in a hotel then (presumably) free food/drink and a party later is absolutely fine? If it was me, I’d be happy to do the latter, or stay home and let my partner enjoy the day with the people they know, whichever suited them better. I’d not be sad in the slightest missing the ceremony when not knowing the people involved.

Why though? He hasn't met the bride or groom. A stranger essentially.

If it was my wedding, your DP wouldn't have got an invite at all 😂

Only friends we had both met got an invite to our wedding. To celebrate us as a couple, guests first need to know us as a couple.

If you're close enough to be her bridesmaid then your partner should get a whole invite. This is rude.

Although on the face of it, it seems rude, I think the bride has a point. Going to a wedding when you know no one but your partner isn't the most fun. If you then don't get to spend time with that partner as they are busy on the top table and having photos done, then what is the point? It doesn't sound like he is going to see these people again. He may much prefer to see you be the bridesmaid at the cermony then go off to the pub to watch a match, then join you in the evening for a dance.