This bloody dog will kill me one day

We rescued an 8 month old staffy x, we are an household that loves dogs and have always rescued which is relevant because we felt like shit at the time and we'd failed massively after many successful rescues.

Due to shift work my DH and I had slept in separate rooms. I woke up well after DH had left for work and found a lid on the sofa, I smelt it and it reminded me of Germolene, but I knew we didn't have that - I found the chewed up tube and it was Voltarol!

My DH had left the living room door open and let the dog have access to everything, including his bedside table. I was ready to file for divorce.

Dog rushed straight to the vets, warnings of kidney failure. He's still here living his life 3 years later, and with no issues. PetPlan were amazing and covered most of the 2 grand cost, unfortunately premiums went up to £189 a month thereafter.

I did use muzzle training when outside though because he'd pick anything up, and it worked.

Now, he just rolls around in horse and fox shit 🤣.

My border terrier ate an entire tub of Vaseline - the next few days the shits flew out of him at great speed! Like greased lightning!

OMG I'm not sure I can believe everything you've said with that gorgeous butter wouldn't melt face!

you might have to get their mouth wired and feed them through a straw!! 🤣🤣

we got home to find our lab wearing the swing bin top round his neck with a bacon packet stuck in his mouth. Fortunately he was ok.

Nothing gladdens a beagle's heart more than a decomposing rabbit to drag home to snack on. Although the solitary, rancid deer leg went down well also.

I had to remove a condom (presumably used 🤢) from my lab's mouth - she found it under a hedge

Border Terrier’s are the best and maddest dogs. I was wading through a river after mine. So headstrong. Love them.

My dog would never. He’s basically a shit eating pilllow.

I often wonder how dogs ever survived in the wild.

Mine once ate two sponges, vet made him vomit them up and a surprise plastic bag came out with them too!

my little brown dog recommends hair scrunchies for a nice snack. Or, the fabric coating of an old tennis ball - these can be found in most dog walking areas too. She did not enjoy the nest built by oak processionary moths though, that came straight back up and left her quite poorly for several days.

Gosh OP absolute sympathy, my scruff eats absolutely anything on our walks.
we recently spent 15 minutes trying to perform the Heimlich manoeuvre on him on a walk after he ate a shite the size of a babies arm.
We have an episode of vomiting and/or diarrhoea every 6 weeks or so as a result of his scavenging, the latest requiring multiple outdoor visits at 12am/2am/4am
Its a complete pain in the arse but he’s absolutely lush so forgiven for all his disgusting habits

Thanks for that.

This absolute shit head ate chocolate as a puppy. Went to the vets, they made him vomit and he barfed a load of chicken wing bones we have no idea he’d eaten.

Just not worth the hassle..

@sellotapechicken my Daughter had to pull a pair of knickers out of the arse of one of her dogs! that dog was a nightmare. bath bombs, bars of soap, paracetamol tablets!! everything

Growing up, our dog ate tinsel. Had two tails for a while...

@sellotapechicken again, same dog! pushes my chair around the kitchen so she can easily steal any food!! even caught her licking the pot of gravy!! the odd leg of lamb, boxes of cakes, you name it, everything is fair game!

@sellotapechicken I have a dog who, when she was a puppy, dived through the house to the first open door which happened to be our bedroom!! grabbed and swallowed one hearing aid (privately purchased and not cheap!!!) never bothered checking out the hundreds of poops every day because I just knew it was not going to be used again!! had to replace the whole pair at a cost of £2.6k! same dog at the collars of 20 made to measure shirts in the tumble drier!!

Many years ago, I had a German Shepherd Dog and an Afghan Hound. The worked as a pair. The Afghan used his long pointy nose and long back legs to stand up and open the handle and catch on the pantry door. The GSD would stand watch. If I strayed from the kitchen towards the pantry, the GSD would run interference (bring me her toys/bark etc) whilst the Affy got into the pantry and lifted anything of interest - cooked chicken, cold cooked sausages etc. They didn't like puddings or biscuits, so left them. After I witnessed them doing this, I changed the door fixture to a twist knob. They used their mutual transferable skills to the fridge. Long nose and powerful paws worked well together . .

In the end, I had to supervise them closely at all times and padlocked both the pantry and the fridge. They were not amused . . .

@littlepammie70 my friends beagle is the greedies bastard of a dog we all know 😂 his talents for stealing food is truly limitless. He’s been known to jump stair gates, get into cupboards and rip into the 20kg bag of dry cat food and then have the temerity to sit by his bowl at dinner time!
He once swiped the burger out of dds bun at a bbq, ate a Christmas pudding for 10 from a hamper, regularly manages to kick the bin out of its cupboard (that the bin didn’t live in pre dog) and knock it over to eat anything he can.
He’s such a character and I love walking him when I’m asked but my god he’s exhausting 😂

I feel less bad now about my dick head Lakeland eating a carrier bag of chicken bones and costing £5k at the vets. Out of hours of course, why do it in hours and save us about £2k. That was jafter stealing a Walls mini milk ice lolly not 2 weeks before and eating it all stick included. £800….again out of hours. He is now muzzled for all out door activities 😂