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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Seriously thinking about leaving the UK - AIBU?

586 replies

HonoraBridge · 28/03/2025 16:31

I love the UK in many ways but it has been going downhill for at least 20 years and it feels as if the speed of the decline is accelerating. I no longer see a happy, or particularly safe, future here. For the first time in my life, I am very seriously thinking about leaving the UK and that feeling gets stronger day by day. When I mention this to friends, many are feeling the same way. YANBU - you are right to think seriously about leaving the UK. YABU - the UK is a still a great country to live in and you are being unreasonable to want to leave.

OP posts:
EasternStandard · 30/03/2025 18:46

Tent cities imply hundreds and those in that link are at about thirty people.

Ireland might have bigger ones, US too. You’d need to show the numbers are equal.

Canada might have some that are bigger than here not sure.

Edit to add we usually use hotels which depending on how people feel is good or costs a fortune at a few million a day, rather than tent cities. Not sure what other countries do with that.

Talkinpeace · 30/03/2025 18:16

The tents in Seattle are US citizens
unable to afford to live in the city
but in need of medical care at the hospital
some of the people camping between the freeway and the hospital
do so to get access to their dialysis appointments

migrant rough sleeping
and citizen rough sleeping are rather different issues

Liker · 30/03/2025 18:11

I saw the tents in Dublin when I visited in June last year, there was a line of them set up along the river full of men sitting around. Quite a few had mobile phones and the tents were all the same kind like they had been handed out by a charity. A few weeks before I visited, there had been trouble and some Irish lads had destroyed tents by throwing them into the river. It said there had been at least 3 times as many as the amount I saw so not sure where the others had set up. There was tension around that area.

In the UK, I've seen the odd homeless person around my town, known drug takers who everyone knows and gets them a cup of coffee and a sausage roll from Greggs etc. They have a scruffy tent and dont seem to accept the help on offer.

I've not seen the East Europeans on the street for years around my area. They used to be on street corners selling the big issue. If they are setting up in London, Birmingham etc - why isnt the government sending them back to the EU?

Paris is an eye opener, but for me I was shocked when I visited Brussels and saw loads of immigrant men sleeping on the streets. In Athens I saw beggars weaving amongst the traffic - that was very sad. Girls and women too.

Parker231 · 30/03/2025 17:49

EasternStandard · 30/03/2025 17:44

Growing problem could apply to anywhere. Canada too.

Given the focus on the opioid crisis lately in the US based on pharma and outcomes we don’t have the same levels.

Tent cities aren’t as much of a thing here either.

The U.K. has issues, of course it does, but I wouldn’t equate US to U.K. on those specific things, maybe Canada is closer to US than here not sure.

https://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-14448881/amp/Migrant-camp-problem-plaguing-Britain-Ireland-Tent-cities-pop-busy-tourist-centres-populated-young-men-Romania-councils-forced-wade-red-tape-remove-pop-hours-later.html

Migrant camp problem plaguing Britain and Ireland

A homeless camp which was dismantled after blighting one of Britain's most exclusive addresses for seven years has reopened - just 400 yards down the road, MailOnline can reveal

https://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-14448881/amp/Migrant-camp-problem-plaguing-Britain-Ireland-Tent-cities-pop-busy-tourist-centres-populated-young-men-Romania-councils-forced-wade-red-tape-remove-pop-hours-later.html

EasternStandard · 30/03/2025 17:44

Parker231 · 30/03/2025 17:25

Have no idea on the like by like. I don’t live in the UK or US. But if anyone in the UK doesn’t think there is a growing problem, they are incredibly naive.

Growing problem could apply to anywhere. Canada too.

Given the focus on the opioid crisis lately in the US based on pharma and outcomes we don’t have the same levels.

Tent cities aren’t as much of a thing here either.

The U.K. has issues, of course it does, but I wouldn’t equate US to U.K. on those specific things, maybe Canada is closer to US than here not sure.

Parker231 · 30/03/2025 17:25

EasternStandard · 30/03/2025 16:03

Are you saying these cities have the equivalent opioid crisis and tent cities as the US?

Can you show in figures or an article where they are equivalent?

Have no idea on the like by like. I don’t live in the UK or US. But if anyone in the UK doesn’t think there is a growing problem, they are incredibly naive.

Talkinpeace · 30/03/2025 16:39

Parker231 · 30/03/2025 13:15

A quick internet search - Bristol, Milton Keynes, Cardiff, Manchester, Oxford, Edinburgh, Sheffield, London, Northampton, Cambridge, Stoke-on-Trent, Leeds, Glasgow and Exeter.

It was something we saw in London on our recent visit back to the uk. There are articles about the growing problem as far back as 2019.

Edited

London has around 12,000 rough sleepers per YEAR on a population of 9,000,000
https://www.london.gov.uk/programmes-strategies/housing-and-land/mayors-priorities-londons-housing-and-land/homelessness/rough-sleeping

Seattle has around 16,000 rough sleepers per NIGHT on a population of 750,000
https://seattle.gov/mayor/one-seattle-initiatives/homelessness-action-plan

Anybody trying to compare the tent city in the grounds of the hospital along I5
with any city in the UK is kidding themselves

EasternStandard · 30/03/2025 16:03

Parker231 · 30/03/2025 13:15

A quick internet search - Bristol, Milton Keynes, Cardiff, Manchester, Oxford, Edinburgh, Sheffield, London, Northampton, Cambridge, Stoke-on-Trent, Leeds, Glasgow and Exeter.

It was something we saw in London on our recent visit back to the uk. There are articles about the growing problem as far back as 2019.

Edited

Are you saying these cities have the equivalent opioid crisis and tent cities as the US?

Can you show in figures or an article where they are equivalent?

Moii · 30/03/2025 14:19

Remember the amount of people trying to get in, the grass isn't always greener

sunshineheart · 30/03/2025 13:52

Bignanna · 28/03/2025 17:23

An earthquake?

Edited

It didnt hit us as bad just a bit of a shake but all good.
But has hit elsewhere bad i have friends in myanmar and its awful.
We are doing everything we can at the moment to help the best way we can.
One of our friends cant find her dog another we have had no contact with but hope he`s okay but we dont know as of yet and one that cant go home because they dont know how safe the building is so have are been staying at mine and are very welcome to do so.
Ive been looking after my neighbours 2 kids since it happened as they both had to go asap to find and hope both of their parents are ok they are ok.
So yes its all going on.
It dose not and will not change my mind about coming back to the uk as this is my home and theses people are my family and have been for 22 year.

Devora13 · 30/03/2025 13:26

@HonoraBridge the comment about speaking the language. Yes, but when we went to live abroad we had basic language for everyday stuff and developed our fluency once there.

There are a lot of places that have English speaking facilities, I don't recommend that you just stick to these as you miss out on so much by not immersing yourself in the language/culture, but you can get by with basics to start, depending on where you go.

Alternatively, a lot of people are looking at commonwealth/former commonwealth countries where English is the main language.

I read an article recently about (I think mainly) mid thirties to mid forties looking at going abroad to live, e.g. Canada, not because it was cheaper in terms of taxation etc, but because the services they contribute to actual work and are available.

Migration is definitely on the increase.

Parker231 · 30/03/2025 13:15

EasternStandard · 30/03/2025 09:32

Which U.K. cities are comparable to US for those issues in pp? eg tent cities, opioid etc

A quick internet search - Bristol, Milton Keynes, Cardiff, Manchester, Oxford, Edinburgh, Sheffield, London, Northampton, Cambridge, Stoke-on-Trent, Leeds, Glasgow and Exeter.

It was something we saw in London on our recent visit back to the uk. There are articles about the growing problem as far back as 2019.

Helterskelterthroughtheday · 30/03/2025 12:06

Laurmolonlabe · 29/03/2025 22:25

I understand the wish to leave- the UK has been going downhill for far longer than 20 years IMO.
This is the product of being at the stage we are, post industrial revolution- most wealth generation, which comes from making things has moved elsewhere, and no matter what stimulus, or government policies are employed, that is not going to change.
The problem with leaving is, where do you go? The same economic fate awaits pretty much all of the Western world.
Other problems are what financial backing do you have? What skills do you have? This strongly impacts where you can go.
I think you will find most of the problems the UK has are also elsewhere- eg. unaffordability of housing, lack of economic growth and worsening public services.
All of these things are born of rapidly increasing wealth inequality, which affects pretty much all of the places you could move to, or they already have massive gaps between rich and poor (eg. India, South Africa and most of South America).
I would therefore think very carefully , and do as much research as possible before you make any firm plans to move.

Lack of affordable housing is not as bad in other parts of Europe - I'd hazard a guess that away from major cities, you can find the equivalent UK housing cheaper in most European countries. We're in a relatively cheap part of France and our house would probably be 5 - 10 times more in the UK (the difference depending on where in the UK).

People aren't flogging themselves to earn enough to pay a massive mortgage and many good things flow from that - taking proper breaks, not working in the evenings so much, more time with family, better quality housing, more garden space etc.

Dodgybarber · 30/03/2025 10:45

MyCatIsTheHeadChef · 28/03/2025 17:00

AAahhh... my dream. Smile

I am envious. One of my Dcs' dream is to study at the Sorbonne so that is my leaning as well. Athough my parents are in Australia and we might head in that general direction.

One of my kids, if they can continue 'moving out' of their lazy late teen phase, will have a chance to study in Western France for a year which will bring a host of opportunities and access to stay in continental Europe. Just hope they grab the chance.

AzurePanda · 30/03/2025 10:25

The problem with immigration is the way it’s handled in this country. Countries such as Switzerland and Australia also have high levels of immigration but they manage it in such a way that it benefits most people, even the low
skilled / low earners while also helping the economy.

So I don’t see anything hypocritical in complaining about
immigration in the UK and planning to move to another country, unless it’s somewhere like Germany or Ireland which has similar issues.

i d

EasternStandard · 30/03/2025 09:32

Parker231 · 29/03/2025 21:29

Some areas have problems but it’s no where near as bad as some US and UK cities.

Which U.K. cities are comparable to US for those issues in pp? eg tent cities, opioid etc

BrightLeader · 30/03/2025 08:00

Personally I want to leave England & move to Scotland as feel the problem is England going downhill & Scotland is my place of birth.

Where do you live in the UK ?

Snakebite61 · 30/03/2025 07:45

Uppitymuppity · 29/03/2025 21:45

Britain is quickly becoming less British and I can entirely see why you would think it's a good idea to leave.

To go somewhere foreign?!?! The stupidity of racism never ceases to amaze me.

Snakebite61 · 30/03/2025 07:41

HonoraBridge · 28/03/2025 16:31

I love the UK in many ways but it has been going downhill for at least 20 years and it feels as if the speed of the decline is accelerating. I no longer see a happy, or particularly safe, future here. For the first time in my life, I am very seriously thinking about leaving the UK and that feeling gets stronger day by day. When I mention this to friends, many are feeling the same way. YANBU - you are right to think seriously about leaving the UK. YABU - the UK is a still a great country to live in and you are being unreasonable to want to leave.

Depends where you are thinking of going to.

JournalistEmily · 30/03/2025 06:52

It’s definitely a bit crap atm. But I wonder if those issues are also global. Everyone is stressed because of the insane amount of money you need to have a good quality of life. Everything feels like a slog. There are so many people here, services are a bit shit, house prices are stupid cos there are so many people. There’s no open discussion about anything, or our future, yeh it’s a bit shite. Not sure anywhere else will be any different though!?!

ADHDat43 · 30/03/2025 06:28

We left ten years ago. When I go back to the UK to visit now I thank my lucky stars we got out.

TacCat49 · 30/03/2025 06:18

Please do your research. I don't think it's any better anywhere else

pookie999 · 30/03/2025 06:14

Definitely a divided country since Bre#hit.
I have applied for my Irish Citizenship and intend to downsize to France. Beautiful country and architecture. Plus I speak French.
The British are so moany and small minded. I intend to live in an international area where I can leave all that behind

Lentilweaver · 30/03/2025 03:07

This is a classic example of so many AIBU posts these days: no information about which country, so no one can offer any relevant advice, then a drip feed of OP considering an investment visa, so all the posts about skills are pretty much irrelevant.

Willyoujustbequiet · 30/03/2025 02:54

Meadowfinch · 28/03/2025 16:50

The UK I live in still has a village pub and a parish council. We have neighbours who like each other, relatively little traffic, no parking issues. Farms, fields and trees and gardens.

I can run without being hassled, I can walk to the pub in the dark. The worst we have is a bit of graffiti. There are job vacancies.

I accept inner cities are not like that. So different people have different experiences.

This

I live in a lovely, safe, small rural town with a fantastic community spirit and excellent state schools. 10 minutes from the best beaches in the country and housing is far cheaper than down south. I'm not budging.

I've lived abroad and came home. The grass was not greener.