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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Seriously thinking about leaving the UK - AIBU?

586 replies

HonoraBridge · 28/03/2025 16:31

I love the UK in many ways but it has been going downhill for at least 20 years and it feels as if the speed of the decline is accelerating. I no longer see a happy, or particularly safe, future here. For the first time in my life, I am very seriously thinking about leaving the UK and that feeling gets stronger day by day. When I mention this to friends, many are feeling the same way. YANBU - you are right to think seriously about leaving the UK. YABU - the UK is a still a great country to live in and you are being unreasonable to want to leave.

OP posts:
PersonallyIdBringAPicnicakaALittleSassy · 31/03/2025 22:24

I was thinking that we could have independent organisations that create the money digitally.(Isn't that the form money mostly takes these days?)

The same sort of thing for services and businesses

Obviously we would still have the same resources, (farms, energy, shops, clothing etc etc) and would hopefully have enough to fund organisations and buy from overseas.

Walkaround · 31/03/2025 22:15

PersonallyIdBringAPicnicakaALittleSassy · 31/03/2025 21:20

How about pension style stipends in different categories for the basics in life. Something to make sure people can have a decent life without having to choose between heating and eating?

With room for paid work if you want a little more and volunteering when you're happy with what you've got.

The money should come from independent places, not the government or businesses as they are more likely to be biased and attract people who are inclined to misuse the privilege. Which seems to be what happened with communism.

The money could get deleted once it has been through the system. With the ability to call people/ organisations out if they go off on one.

Pie in the sky enough for you?

? Where is the money coming from for “pension style stipends”? What is “money”? Where do countries get it from? Where, as a country, does the UK get most of its food and other resources?

PersonallyIdBringAPicnicakaALittleSassy · 31/03/2025 21:24

I should add - the stipends would be available to all and not means tested - as a fall back, whatever is going on in your life.

Also there would need to be a massive change in attitude. Maybe not even call it capitalism or communism.

PersonallyIdBringAPicnicakaALittleSassy · 31/03/2025 21:20

How about pension style stipends in different categories for the basics in life. Something to make sure people can have a decent life without having to choose between heating and eating?

With room for paid work if you want a little more and volunteering when you're happy with what you've got.

The money should come from independent places, not the government or businesses as they are more likely to be biased and attract people who are inclined to misuse the privilege. Which seems to be what happened with communism.

The money could get deleted once it has been through the system. With the ability to call people/ organisations out if they go off on one.

Pie in the sky enough for you?

Walkaround · 31/03/2025 21:11

PersonallyIdBringAPicnicakaALittleSassy · 31/03/2025 19:36

So...form a new plan? If countries can ditch communism, surly we can confront and change capitalism?

I don't agree that humans are always that stupid. The economy and the political systems don't do us justice! There are people out there with good ideas- they just don't get listened to.

How can one country change global capitalism?

Barbadossunset · 31/03/2025 19:59

PersonallyIdBringAPicnicakaALittleSassy · Today 19:36
So...form a new plan? If countries can ditch communism, surly we can confront and change capitalism

What do you think would be a good alternative to capitalism?

PersonallyIdBringAPicnicakaALittleSassy · 31/03/2025 19:41

Aren't we all!

scorpiogirly · 31/03/2025 19:40

I'd love to get out of here but not sure where I would go. Everywhere seems just as bad. I think I'd be best suited to my own private island.

PersonallyIdBringAPicnicakaALittleSassy · 31/03/2025 19:36

So...form a new plan? If countries can ditch communism, surly we can confront and change capitalism?

I don't agree that humans are always that stupid. The economy and the political systems don't do us justice! There are people out there with good ideas- they just don't get listened to.

Walkaround · 31/03/2025 17:12

RedToothBrush · 31/03/2025 08:38

It's not Tory austerity that did it. Not really. If it was other countries would not be facing many of the same issues.

It is the bank crisis that's the primary cause. It meant that a generation shoved their debts onto the next generation and that the billionaires could capitalise. We have politicians telling us that no one saw it coming which is a flat out lie - we did and planned and considered it when we bought our first house in 2007. We saw it coming ourselves but also had a friend working in the stock market at the time who actively warned us.

This was then further capitalised on by these disaster capitalists with Brexit and COVID. The UK has always had a greater gap in pay between lowest paid workers and the highest incomes and that has affected policy making - a lot of it is home owners versus non homeowners in the UK.

The difference is particularly stark in the UK for one particular reason can be seen in an age divide which is roughly between 42 and 47. It's essentially 'did you buy a house before 2008?' If you did you are financially much better off.

Trump is trying to trigger more economic crisis now - this suits disaster capitalists. That's a lot of what all the tariff stuff is about. This is why billionaires are flocking to him.

They know there is a generational tipping point otherwise that approaches where younger lower paid workers outnumber those who are of pensionable age. For years across Europe pension have been prioritised and isn't affordable because it was the vote winner with the boomer generation - it created a system that's on the verge of going bust which ensures there is demand for change regardless of everything else and regardless of other crisis. These crisis have make this more inevitable and stark though.

There was going to be a recognition it's the billionaires from 2008 that were the problem.

They wanted to prevent that from forming politically to protect and maximise their own profits. They don't want international taxations that are placed on them. They saw the banking crisis coming and they see the demographic crisis coming and are acting accordingly.

On that basis, it’s not the bank crisis, either, it’s capitalism in general and started way before the latest bank crisis. Now we have global markets, opportunists who are only interested in making money for themselves, not in whether anything useful is produced from it, can create booms and busts on a global scale, whereas in times past it could be isolated to particular countries and investors. As countries cannot actually extricate themselves from the global marketplace, it makes f* all difference who anyone votes for - no individual country has any control over the behaviour of disaster capitalists or the markets in general, and if they try to exert any control, other countries open their markets up to attract the business elsewhere.

Disaster capitalists have rightly recognised that even in “democratic” countries, humans are too bloody selfish to collaborate with every other country in the world to stop the behaviour and will instead act against each others’ interests (and ultimately their own) in the hope they get to keep some of the disaster capitalists’ gains as a reward for facilitating the behaviour in the first place. In fact, people in democracies have been rushing to vote disaster capitalists and billionnaires into positions of power, because they don’t want to share what is not actually being shared with them in the first place, unless they are already enjoying a nice fat pension.

Kendodd · 31/03/2025 15:08

RedToothBrush · 31/03/2025 08:38

It's not Tory austerity that did it. Not really. If it was other countries would not be facing many of the same issues.

It is the bank crisis that's the primary cause. It meant that a generation shoved their debts onto the next generation and that the billionaires could capitalise. We have politicians telling us that no one saw it coming which is a flat out lie - we did and planned and considered it when we bought our first house in 2007. We saw it coming ourselves but also had a friend working in the stock market at the time who actively warned us.

This was then further capitalised on by these disaster capitalists with Brexit and COVID. The UK has always had a greater gap in pay between lowest paid workers and the highest incomes and that has affected policy making - a lot of it is home owners versus non homeowners in the UK.

The difference is particularly stark in the UK for one particular reason can be seen in an age divide which is roughly between 42 and 47. It's essentially 'did you buy a house before 2008?' If you did you are financially much better off.

Trump is trying to trigger more economic crisis now - this suits disaster capitalists. That's a lot of what all the tariff stuff is about. This is why billionaires are flocking to him.

They know there is a generational tipping point otherwise that approaches where younger lower paid workers outnumber those who are of pensionable age. For years across Europe pension have been prioritised and isn't affordable because it was the vote winner with the boomer generation - it created a system that's on the verge of going bust which ensures there is demand for change regardless of everything else and regardless of other crisis. These crisis have make this more inevitable and stark though.

There was going to be a recognition it's the billionaires from 2008 that were the problem.

They wanted to prevent that from forming politically to protect and maximise their own profits. They don't want international taxations that are placed on them. They saw the banking crisis coming and they see the demographic crisis coming and are acting accordingly.

Tory austerity made everything worse though and because of this and Brexit we are doing worse than lots of other places.

Fupoffyagrasshole · 31/03/2025 13:28

4pmwinetimebebeh · 31/03/2025 08:57

Thats what we are doing tbh. Moving abroad for a few years in a place much better for salaries, schools, saving. Will continue NI contributions and move back in a few years.
We've worked for years already and seen our quality of life decline and public sector jobs become horrendous. Why wouldnt we leave?

they can do what they like! Who are you to decide who stays away and for how long or when they come back 😂😂

Mum2EmLuJa · 31/03/2025 13:25

I feel if reform get in at the next election I will be desperate to get out and just go and live somewhere like a greek island if possible!

4pmwinetimebebeh · 31/03/2025 08:57

SalfordQuays · 31/03/2025 08:03

@Helterskelterthroughtheday please don’t do what a lot of people do - live abroad when they’re younger and paying tax, then come back to the UK to benefit from free healthcare when they’re pensioners. If you’re going, please stay away.

Thats what we are doing tbh. Moving abroad for a few years in a place much better for salaries, schools, saving. Will continue NI contributions and move back in a few years.
We've worked for years already and seen our quality of life decline and public sector jobs become horrendous. Why wouldnt we leave?

Helterskelterthroughtheday · 31/03/2025 08:47

SamanthaJayneFrances · 31/03/2025 08:16

Hope you enjoy it Helter. My inlaws moved to France but could not settle and returned within 2 years, the way of life is different to the UK and what they enjoyed at first, later infuriated them.

But sunshine is a big pull for some people.

Where I live in the Shires, I get everything you mention above apart from the sun which is not south of France temps! Also I will not knock the NHS, had fabulous treatment from them. Plus private treatment is an option if I desired it.

We've got friends and a life in France having had a home there for a number of years so know what we're getting into. It's a completely different way of life, nothing like the UK, so I can see why some people wouldn't settle.

I've lived all over the UK, and there really isn't anything comparable - I don't mean better or worse, just different. Life is much slower here, I like that everything stops for lunch, that people have time, that where we are it's usual to grow your own fruit and veg and most of all for everyone to help each other out.

RedToothBrush · 31/03/2025 08:38

Kendodd · 31/03/2025 07:47

Looking back, the world has gone to shit since the banking crisis of 2008.
This lead to Tory austerity, which had a big hand in Brexit. Then we had covid, then the Ukraine war, then Trump mark two (I believe not unrelated to the impoverishment of the American people after the banking crisis).

The bankers and billionaires are all doing great though. Their money is massively up.

It's not Tory austerity that did it. Not really. If it was other countries would not be facing many of the same issues.

It is the bank crisis that's the primary cause. It meant that a generation shoved their debts onto the next generation and that the billionaires could capitalise. We have politicians telling us that no one saw it coming which is a flat out lie - we did and planned and considered it when we bought our first house in 2007. We saw it coming ourselves but also had a friend working in the stock market at the time who actively warned us.

This was then further capitalised on by these disaster capitalists with Brexit and COVID. The UK has always had a greater gap in pay between lowest paid workers and the highest incomes and that has affected policy making - a lot of it is home owners versus non homeowners in the UK.

The difference is particularly stark in the UK for one particular reason can be seen in an age divide which is roughly between 42 and 47. It's essentially 'did you buy a house before 2008?' If you did you are financially much better off.

Trump is trying to trigger more economic crisis now - this suits disaster capitalists. That's a lot of what all the tariff stuff is about. This is why billionaires are flocking to him.

They know there is a generational tipping point otherwise that approaches where younger lower paid workers outnumber those who are of pensionable age. For years across Europe pension have been prioritised and isn't affordable because it was the vote winner with the boomer generation - it created a system that's on the verge of going bust which ensures there is demand for change regardless of everything else and regardless of other crisis. These crisis have make this more inevitable and stark though.

There was going to be a recognition it's the billionaires from 2008 that were the problem.

They wanted to prevent that from forming politically to protect and maximise their own profits. They don't want international taxations that are placed on them. They saw the banking crisis coming and they see the demographic crisis coming and are acting accordingly.

Helterskelterthroughtheday · 31/03/2025 08:37

SalfordQuays · 31/03/2025 08:03

@Helterskelterthroughtheday please don’t do what a lot of people do - live abroad when they’re younger and paying tax, then come back to the UK to benefit from free healthcare when they’re pensioners. If you’re going, please stay away.

Bearing in mind that I've paid tax and NI for over 30 years and worked in the NHS all my working life, I'm not sure your 'advice' is particularly relevant....

SamanthaJayneFrances · 31/03/2025 08:16

Helterskelterthroughtheday · 29/03/2025 00:13

We're leaving the UK in a couple of weeks. I've no regrets, which is surprising me tbh! In fact I can't wait. We've lived with a foot in each country for a few years so know what we're moving to.

We're getting peace, quiet, countryside, low crime levels, way less traffic, better weather, healthcare that outperforms the NHS and very cheap housing. Taxes will be a little higher, and there'll be a contribution to healthcare costs, but that's literally a small price to pay.

Hope you enjoy it Helter. My inlaws moved to France but could not settle and returned within 2 years, the way of life is different to the UK and what they enjoyed at first, later infuriated them.

But sunshine is a big pull for some people.

Where I live in the Shires, I get everything you mention above apart from the sun which is not south of France temps! Also I will not knock the NHS, had fabulous treatment from them. Plus private treatment is an option if I desired it.

SalfordQuays · 31/03/2025 08:03

Helterskelterthroughtheday · 29/03/2025 00:13

We're leaving the UK in a couple of weeks. I've no regrets, which is surprising me tbh! In fact I can't wait. We've lived with a foot in each country for a few years so know what we're moving to.

We're getting peace, quiet, countryside, low crime levels, way less traffic, better weather, healthcare that outperforms the NHS and very cheap housing. Taxes will be a little higher, and there'll be a contribution to healthcare costs, but that's literally a small price to pay.

@Helterskelterthroughtheday please don’t do what a lot of people do - live abroad when they’re younger and paying tax, then come back to the UK to benefit from free healthcare when they’re pensioners. If you’re going, please stay away.

Kendodd · 31/03/2025 07:47

Looking back, the world has gone to shit since the banking crisis of 2008.
This lead to Tory austerity, which had a big hand in Brexit. Then we had covid, then the Ukraine war, then Trump mark two (I believe not unrelated to the impoverishment of the American people after the banking crisis).

The bankers and billionaires are all doing great though. Their money is massively up.

LyndzB · 31/03/2025 04:43

MyCatIsTheHeadChef · 28/03/2025 16:37

We feel that way also. DH is a Brit I am not. We have lived abroad and in the UK since 2005. We are just waiting in theory for our DS to finish school- but we may jump before that. Maybe to my home country. Maybe to the country DH was born as he is a dual citizen. We wished to be here forever. I called the UK my 'death country' as in the country I would die on.

No more. We are net contributers with a disabled child and feel pummelled completely.

What are things like in your home country if you don’t mind me asking?

I think about moving a lot but then think are things really better in other places? And maybe they really are! But I’m always stumped as to where to move and where would be a better quality of life (and where would actually accept me as both me and DH were born in the UK!)

iamnotalemon · 31/03/2025 02:57

@sunshineheart hope your friends are ok x

Lollipop81 · 30/03/2025 20:08

Readingismyfirstlove · 29/03/2025 20:03

Where do you live?

Birmingham

Parker231 · 30/03/2025 19:58

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Helterskelterthroughtheday · 30/03/2025 19:55

Parker231 · 29/03/2025 21:29

Some areas have problems but it’s no where near as bad as some US and UK cities.

Oh come on. Vancouver? There's nowhere like East Hastings Street in England.