Massive overreaction to a TV show

I'm a teacher (relevant only as pp's have mentioned teacher friends etc) - haven't seen it, don't know what its about, TV drama I assume, not sure what Baby Reindeer is, sounds like something tedious from Christmas? and Andrew Tate, heard the name, no idea what he does either.

All or none could be relevant to me, or indeed not.

Even if your own children are not interested in or influenced by online media. their peers are. How can that not be relevant?

I don't have Netflix, but I am sick of the hype for this show, they were even advertising it here on MN. The subject matter is very dark, even if I had Netflix I would give it a miss.

I don't have teenagers, but widespread changes in young people affect us all. Children are the future and if their attitudes and behaviour are messed up then all of us will be worse off.

What a sheltered life you must live then OP, if none of the issues in the play are relevant. Have you never felt uncomfortable by a male invading your space? Have you never known a male have a burst of temper? Have you never had to keep calm to keep someone happy? Have your kids never sent a text with emojis you don’t understand?
all of these are issues raised alongside the obvious.

It may not be relevant - either because your children are older like mine (32/35/38) or have no children.

It may not be relevant because your children have no social media accounts and no interactions with any other children. Which would be odd.

It may be that your children manage to pass through their adolescent years uneventfully. Which would be lucky and rare.

It maybe that you are in for a shock later. I hope not.

The thing is that this was an ordinary family, 2 children doing ok at school, nothing to write home about. But then it happened, things had been bubbling under unknown to the, supportive, and loving parents.

Did you know the significance about different coloured heart emojis?

It's something that you, everyone, should know about as you don't know when aspects of your life, your family, are about to hit the fan. Supporting your children has just got a lot harder.

It amazes me that teenage DC don't connect to it at all though, they must have some understanding of what happens on the Internet and situations where friends/acquaintances have been in vulnerable positions. I have a lot of pride in my DC and how they have a good understanding of others/others situations, its an important part of life to understand what goes on around you, to be waltzing round not having a clue about what is going on in the world is shocking to me.

I watched it with my 11 year old son and it was quite eye opening that he knew things I didn’t regarding what different coloured emojis are supposed to mean etc. It has led to some interesting conversations that I wasn’t expecting until he was a bit older but I think it’s good that it’s opened up the discussion.

Wow, what odd comments OP! Even my 16 yo understands why it is relevant, we had an extremely interesting conversation about it and about Andrew Tate/his message. He discussed with me how he felt he had a lot of free access to the Internet but that he was lucky he wasn't the sort of person to get involved (mostly) in stuff he shouldn't but that he can really understand how some of the more vulnerable kids can get pulled in. He definitely feels his DC will have a lot more restrictions on their access.

I wonder if he understands slightly more as he works in an area where he has had to do training around how vulnerable people can get involved in extremist activity. Read about Andrew Ibrahim, it is a prime example of how people can get caught up with things online. I just think it is way easier that some people think, and being on denial that it could never happen to people you know is a recipe for disaster potentially.

It's not relevant to your life until it is.

How do you know it’s not relevant to your children? Do you know everything they look at online? I reckon you’d be surprised, and that’s the whole point of it really.

Exactly what my teacher friends are saying.

They are praising the show, whilst parents are acting like it is completely removed from reality. It's interesting.

And your children would absolutely only tell you the truth, the whole truth and nothing but the truth…
whether you/they think it’s relevant to them now or not, I’d try not be too blinkered

I’m astonished that anyone finds ot remotely relevant

”Astonished” when smartphone use is probably the most highly discussed and relevant topic of parenting and child welfare in the last 5yrs? Okay sure, astonishing 🙄

If you have children, it’s relevant.

If they have access to smart phones/internet, then it’s especially relevant.

If they don’t have access, then that’s already a conscious choice you have made based on the dangers of smart phones.

If they are around peers who use smart phones, then it’s still relevant.

That’s ok. Netflix didn’t make it just for you.

laughed out loud at this one

How old are your children? I can see skme
of your points but not to see the relevance of the online influences baffles me and how we don’t know was surely the point

I don't understand why you're telling us this?

Emmerdale doesn't particularly resonate with me but it's never entered my head to tell everyone.

I think that’s always the risk if you watch something a little late to the party and have heard all the hype. You would have probably found it more interesting/impactful if you’d watched it cold, not knowing anything.

It isn’t directly related to my life, I checked with my teens, they had never heard of the term “incel” and I did a little pop quiz on emoji’s and they had no clue. My DD ended up watching it herself and said it felt like a different country that she was watching and couldn’t relate at all.

That doesn’t mean I/we didn’t find it powerful and interesting and worried about the vast number of kids that this is reflecting. It was hugely eye-opening.

But what I personally loved about the programme was the way it was shot. All in one take. I found that added so much to the intensity. I’ve never seen anything shot that way before.

It highlighted so much that we normalise: family dynamics that feature unexpressed emotions, which leads to misdirected anger (not even necessarily violence or overt abuse), and that perpetuate traditional gender roles, while leaving children and teens to their own devices - literally - all which unintentionally contribute to children's view of the world, which is then exacerbated by the horrific and toxic rise of online influencers who are able to reach children who parents think are "safe" in their bedrooms. It doesn't just affect parents that "don't give a shit" - the point was that the parents in the programme did give a shit about their children, but they were so entrenched in their world view that it was all just normal to them. As it is to many many "good" families out there. It is an eye-opener and should be discussed. So, I would argue that if it doesn't seem relevant to you, that is much the point of the whole drama, because it's probably more relevant to you than you think.

I thought the exact same. It barely scratched the surface. I assumed the whole show was about incel culture and the impact phone use had on teenage kids, but I really isn’t. There were about 4 conversations about it. Maybe that was the point, his parents had no idea what he was doing online and this world he was immersed in, and neither did the viewer.

OMG I know right!! I remember when Friends came out, so much hype!! I don’t have any friends so totes didn’t resonate with me.