AIBU about how this autistic/ADHD parent manages symptoms around their children.

They all do otherwise they wouldn’t get a diagnosis .

No, not one friend. I used a friend as an example. I have researched this area a lot and I am certainly not ignorant. It really isn't that controversial to believe that some diagnoses aren't robust and there are lots of scientists and other experts that agree with me. It's not some weird, marginal view.

My reference about the podcast was simply because the podcast was out today. The expert being interviewed was Owen O'Kane who has extensive experience in this field. I suppose he must also be ignorant though.

Also I never said anxiety didn't exist. Stop making weird straw man arguments. I simply referenced the fact that Owen believes that anxiety disorder doesn't exist. This is a very different thing! Don't call me ignorant when you misrepresent what I've written either deliberately or through complete misunderstanding.

So all the other experts that also disagree with you are ignorant then? I am certainly not alone in voicing concern in this area. Your reluctance to acknowledge any of the very valid issues that have been highlighted in this area just make me think that you have a massive amount of false certainty. The science simply doesn't support most of what you say.

No, not one friend. I used a friend as an example. I have researched this area a lot and I am certainly not ignorant. It really isn't that controversial to believe that some diagnoses aren't robust and there are lots of scientists and other experts that agree with me. It's not some weird, marginal view.

My reference about the podcast was simply because the podcast was out today. The expert being interviewed was Owen O'Kane who has extensive experience in this field. I suppose he must also be ignorant though.

Also I never said anxiety didn't exist. Stop making weird straw man arguments. I simply referenced the fact that Owen believes that anxiety disorder doesn't exist. This is a very different thing! Don't call me ignorant when you misrepresent what I've written either deliberately or through complete misunderstanding.

What is the true meaning of ignorance?

a lack of knowledge, understanding
: a lack of knowledge, understanding, or education : the state of being ignorant.

You are ignorant.

One friend and a fucking podcast?! This is enough to make you believe anxiety doesn’t exist and diagnosis isn’t robust enough? That being diagnosed isn’t helpful? Wow

I'm not ignorant. I don't agree with you but it absolutely doesn't make me ignorant.

Because these statements are predicated on an assumption that the diagnosis is robust and accurate. We know that this isn't the case. With one friend, ADHD was a completely inappropriate diagnosis and it was subsequently changed to bipolar disorder. This was devastating and incredibly confusing for her. The overlap between the symptoms led her to believe that it 'made everything make sense' but it was fundamentally wrong. Treatment was ineffective and it was just a terrible situation. Vulnerable people are desperate for an answer and something that makes sense of the things they are experiencing.

I also think the idea that people are broken if they don't have a diagnosis or label is awful. The human condition is varied and not every undesirable or unwanted trait is as a result of a disorder. Today I listened to a podcast by an expert that believed that anxiety disorders don't exist and that it's an inappropriate diagnosis for people experiencing anxiety that needs to be managed as a normal part of the human condition. Having a label and diagnosis can be a crutch for lots of people but if we are not getting to the root cause of what is actually going on then it isn't helpful to people on the long term.

Because these statements are predicated on an assumption that the diagnosis is robust and accurate. We know that this isn't the case. With one friend, ADHD was a completely inappropriate diagnosis and it was subsequently changed to bipolar disorder. This was devastating and incredibly confusing for her. The overlap between the symptoms led her to believe that it 'made everything make sense' but it was fundamentally wrong. Treatment was ineffective and it was just a terrible situation. Vulnerable people are desperate for an answer and something that makes sense of the things they are experiencing.

I also think the idea that people are broken if they don't have a diagnosis or label is awful. The human condition is varied and not every undesirable or unwanted trait is as a result of a disorder. Today I listened to a podcast by an expert that believed that anxiety disorders don't exist and that it's an inappropriate diagnosis for people experiencing anxiety that needs to be managed as a normal part of the human condition. Having a label and diagnosis can be a crutch for lots of people but if we are not getting to the root cause of what is actually going on then it isn't helpful to people on the long term.

Why on earth do you find that alarming? A statement like that just highlights your complete ignorance of the subject.

Why on earth do you find that alarming? A statement like that just highlights your complete ignorance of the subject.

I think you almost certainly would. The odds would very much be in your favour. Whether you should get an ADHD diagnosis and what this means is quite another matter.

I have seen so many people upon recieving a diagnosis say 'it all makes sense now' and 'I'm relieved to know I'm not broken'. I find both of these sentiments really alarming.

I don't doubt that those who pay for these assessments are struggling with something and finding life hard. They are looking for answers.

Do I believe that they all have the condition that they believe they have? Almost certainly not. There is a huge overlap that exists between ADHD, ASD, bipolar, ODD, anxiety etc, so much so that medical professionals struggle to distinguish between them and assign the correct diagnosis. You're asking me to believe that all these people paying for an ADHD assessment are effectively accurately self diagnosing at a rate of 95-100? Sorry no, I don't buy it. I think we would be doing a disservice to very vulnerable people to pretend this is at all credible. It is a complete scandal!

I think you almost certainly would. The odds would very much be in your favour. Whether you should get an ADHD diagnosis and what this means is quite another matter.

I have seen so many people upon recieving a diagnosis say 'it all makes sense now' and 'I'm relieved to know I'm not broken'. I find both of these sentiments really alarming.

@Bumpitybumper i totally agree, as someone with a medicated ND child ( probably many of us then start to recognise our own traits ) and “ one of those” wider families where we have some people who have diagnoses and quite a lot with asd/ adhd traits , its fairly obvious that it boils down to a degree of professional opinion and circumstances as to where you draw that line between those who “need” and would be given a diagnosis and those that don’t. Would I be given a diagnosis if I pursued a private one? Possibly , possibly not .

Do you think that someone is going to pay >£1000 in order to just see whether they might have ADHD or autism for no real reason? What do you think the benefits are of getting a diagnosis if you don't have it? Do you think that, even with a diagnosis, you get any support without fighting for it every step of the way? I have an ADHD diagnosis and the only "perk" I get is reasonable adjustments at work which help me to perform at roughly the same level as everyone else most of the time. Things like getting instructions in writing rather than verbally. Some people think you can walk into a clinic and walk out with a piece of paper entitling you to PIP and a free puppy.

If someone has got to that stage, they are struggling significantly and have done enough research to know already what the problem is.

Again that's incorrect, "all" people with ASD do not face severe/significant issues. Some do. Some don't.

Do you think that someone is going to pay >£1000 in order to just see whether they might have ADHD or autism for no real reason? What do you think the benefits are of getting a diagnosis if you don't have it? Do you think that, even with a diagnosis, you get any support without fighting for it every step of the way? I have an ADHD diagnosis and the only "perk" I get is reasonable adjustments at work which help me to perform at roughly the same level as everyone else most of the time. Things like getting instructions in writing rather than verbally. Some people think you can walk into a clinic and walk out with a piece of paper entitling you to PIP and a free puppy.

If someone has got to that stage, they are struggling significantly and have done enough research to know already what the problem is.

@MrsSunshine2b the govt is tightening the criteria for PIP payments partly because of the huge increase in claimants with anxiety / depression but also of autism / adhd since 2000… many of those have been previously been able to claim will be excluded …so that has been one “ benefit” of getting a diagnosis ..as is the fact that some schools ( unlawfully) will not give adjustments or support to kids without a diagnosis, even though they are supposed to support according to need.

The controversy is that some private providers have extremely high rates of diagnosis (bordering on 100%). It is therefore completely possible that you have effectively paid for a diagnosis. This doesn't necessarily mean that you don't have ADHD but that the diagnosis that you do have may not be as robust as it should be.