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Original poster

To think SAHM with young DC deserve more respect

954 replies

CheekyFawn · 25/03/2025 21:22

I work full time but currently on maternity leave looking after my 5 months old baby and a toddler DS who is 3 yo.
I just don't know where my time goes. Between breastfeeding baby, getting DS ready for preschool and tidying up the house, cooking meals etc, it just feels like there is no time at all even to have 5 mins of coffee break. I feel it was much better when I was at work couple of months ago when DS was in nursery that I used to get at least a lunch break for an hour or 30 mins at least or time between meetings to have a coffee and look at my phone in peace. I imagine this is I think how a day looks for SAHM with young DC and it's bloody hard. Many people just assume they are not doing much but I think they deserve more respect.

OP posts:
LizzoBennett · 25/03/2025 21:31

I'm a SAHM with a 4yo and 17mo. My eldest wasn't at pre-school or any form of childcare until 3yo, and that first year felt hard at times. I think at the newborn stage it isn't so bad as baby just has to slot into the firstborn's schedule but eventually the second child becomes more active and the disparity in their interests and needs makes it much for difficult to manage alongside being productive. I can see that my eldest is beginning to engage with their sibling in proper games now. It feels like I'm starting to emerge from the trenches.

What worked for me was allowing myself to let go of schedules. I roll with the punches and remember that I chose this path for my own good reasons.

ItGhoul · 25/03/2025 21:30

I don’t really see why they deserve more respect that anyone else. Yes, it can be hard work looking after a baby. But plenty of other things in life are hard too, or harder. And presumably you chose to have a baby. So while I have every respect for anyone who manages to keep a kid alive without dropping it on its head or leaving it on a bus, it also don’t think it’s anything exceptional in comparison to many other things.

Original poster
CheekyFawn · 25/03/2025 21:30

Bushmillsbabe · 25/03/2025 21:28

I never felt disrespected whilst on mat leave. My mum was a SAHM until youngest child 9, and was treated with a huge amount of respect by my Dad.

Why do you not feel respected, and who by? Are these people whose opinion matters to you?

It's not about me but I see this opinion in my friend and family circles that SAHM don't do as much as working mums and they have got it easy.

OP posts:
Bushmillsbabe · 25/03/2025 21:28

I never felt disrespected whilst on mat leave. My mum was a SAHM until youngest child 9, and was treated with a huge amount of respect by my Dad.

Why do you not feel respected, and who by? Are these people whose opinion matters to you?