To think SAHM with young DC deserve more respect

So what was 'clap for the NHS' about? Why do workplaces have award ceremonies? Of course external validation and respect is important.

I can only speak for myself, but I definitely do respect working mums. Very much. I'm not blaming them for doing what they need to do. That's not the point. The point is that we need workplace cultures that make situations where families are forced to put babies in childcare centres for 12 hour days become a thing of the past. People deserve a better work / life balance and children deserve better than this.

Wouldn’t it be great if we just respected each other regardless of their choices in life but based on their behaviour to us and others.

I think we need to be honest that long days in childcare are not ideal for very young children / babies. That's not to say they will be damaged for life, but let's face it, for too many families today, it's an economic necessity rather than a positive choice made in the child's interests, in the majority of cases.

There is a place for nurseries after the age of about 2.5 / 3 years when toddlers start to meaningfully socialise, etc. But a few hours in the day is enough and they really don't need to be there 5 days a week 'to socialise.'

Because of the cost of living requiring two parents to work in more cases than not. things like nurseries that take tiny babies for ten hour days are marketed as 'enabling.' But really mums (and dads) shouldn't need to be rushing babies to nurseries for breakfast and then picking them up at 5 or 6, as millions of parents are now required to do.

And now the govt tell families "oh look you lucky people - you now don't even have to bother giving your school kids breakfast. You can take them to school even earlier because breakfast is now the schools job. Then put them in after school clubs too if you need to."

It might be convenient for parents but you can't tell me any of this is in the interests of most babies and children, except the severely deprived. Instead of breakfast clubs and 'wrap around' care and nurseries that will take babies for 12 hour days, the govt need to be putting children's needs first and foremost. At present, priorities are backwards. They should be incentivising companies to let mums and/ or dads work more flexibly, at least in the preschool years. If not even giving your own child some toast or whatever in the mornings now is being framed as 'progress', I think society needs a drastic rethink.

I think we need to be honest that long days in childcare are not ideal for very young children / babies. That's not to say they will be damaged for life, but let's face it, for too many families today, it's an economic necessity rather than a positive choice made in the child's interests, in the majority of cases.

There is a place for nurseries after the age of about 2.5 / 3 years when toddlers start to meaningfully socialise, etc. But a few hours in the day is enough and they really don't need to be there 5 days a week 'to socialise.'

Because of the cost of living requiring two parents to work in more cases than not. things like nurseries that take tiny babies for ten hour days are marketed as 'enabling.' But really mums (and dads) shouldn't need to be rushing babies to nurseries for breakfast and then picking them up at 5 or 6, as millions of parents are now required to do.

And now the govt tell families "oh look you lucky people - you now don't even have to bother giving your school kids breakfast. You can take them to school even earlier because breakfast is now the schools job. Then put them in after school clubs too if you need to."

It might be convenient for parents but you can't tell me any of this is in the interests of most babies and children, except the severely deprived. Instead of breakfast clubs and 'wrap around' care and nurseries that will take babies for 12 hour days, the govt need to be putting children's needs first and foremost. At present, priorities are backwards. They should be incentivising companies to let mums and/ or dads work more flexibly, at least in the preschool years. If not even giving your own child some toast or whatever in the mornings now is being framed as 'progress', I think society needs a drastic rethink.

My post is neither disrespectful nor ignorant. It was factual.

I was a SAHM with 3 kids (twins and a 5 year old) and 2 dogs. I now work full time as a teacher, dealing with up to 180 teenagers a day, and often have to choose between peeing and eating.

We all still need to eat, the laundry still needs doing, the dogs still need walking, the house gets just as messy and dirty, and now they're older they all want to go to different activities, need help with homework, friends round etc...

Life was WAY easier as a SAHM when the kids were little compared to now.

Life may be busy nowadays, but it's still fun!

A childminder is not a parent. They are not looking to bond in that way and nor should they be. They are there because they are paid (and the pay is diabolically low, but that's another thread).

I couldn’t agree more. Babies and children under 3 need to be with a primary caregiver and form a strong bond.

I couldn’t agree more. Babies and children under 3 need to be with a primary caregiver and form a strong bond.

I couldn’t agree more. Babies and children under 3 need to be with a primary caregiver and form a strong bond.

What is WOW about families being able to expect a more reasonable work / life balance? The onus needs to be in employers. Much more flexibility for mums and dads so that babies and children don't have to do such long days in nurseries or schools. At the moment, policies are all aimed at parents working longer and longer hours and children spending longer and longer days at nursery or school.

I think we need to be honest that long days in childcare are not ideal for very young children / babies. That's not to say they will be damaged for life, but let's face it, for too many families today, it's an economic necessity rather than a positive choice made in the child's interests, in the majority of cases.

There is a place for nurseries after the age of about 2.5 / 3 years when toddlers start to meaningfully socialise, etc. But a few hours in the day is enough and they really don't need to be there 5 days a week 'to socialise.'

Because of the cost of living requiring two parents to work in more cases than not. things like nurseries that take tiny babies for ten hour days are marketed as 'enabling.' But really mums (and dads) shouldn't need to be rushing babies to nurseries for breakfast and then picking them up at 5 or 6, as millions of parents are now required to do.

And now the govt tell families "oh look you lucky people - you now don't even have to bother giving your school kids breakfast. You can take them to school even earlier because breakfast is now the schools job. Then put them in after school clubs too if you need to."

It might be convenient for parents but you can't tell me any of this is in the interests of most babies and children, except the severely deprived. Instead of breakfast clubs and 'wrap around' care and nurseries that will take babies for 12 hour days, the govt need to be putting children's needs first and foremost. At present, priorities are backwards. They should be incentivising companies to let mums and/ or dads work more flexibly, at least in the preschool years. If not even giving your own child some toast or whatever in the mornings now is being framed as 'progress', I think society needs a drastic rethink.

I think we need to be honest that long days in childcare are not ideal for very young children / babies. That's not to say they will be damaged for life, but let's face it, for too many families today, it's an economic necessity rather than a positive choice made in the child's interests, in the majority of cases.

There is a place for nurseries after the age of about 2.5 / 3 years when toddlers start to meaningfully socialise, etc. But a few hours in the day is enough and they really don't need to be there 5 days a week 'to socialise.'

Because of the cost of living requiring two parents to work in more cases than not. things like nurseries that take tiny babies for ten hour days are marketed as 'enabling.' But really mums (and dads) shouldn't need to be rushing babies to nurseries for breakfast and then picking them up at 5 or 6, as millions of parents are now required to do.

And now the govt tell families "oh look you lucky people - you now don't even have to bother giving your school kids breakfast. You can take them to school even earlier because breakfast is now the schools job. Then put them in after school clubs too if you need to."

It might be convenient for parents but you can't tell me any of this is in the interests of most babies and children, except the severely deprived. Instead of breakfast clubs and 'wrap around' care and nurseries that will take babies for 12 hour days, the govt need to be putting children's needs first and foremost. At present, priorities are backwards. They should be incentivising companies to let mums and/ or dads work more flexibly, at least in the preschool years. If not even giving your own child some toast or whatever in the mornings now is being framed as 'progress', I think society needs a drastic rethink.