Sister in law using same baby name

Yeah, I think it’s weird. But then, both my mum and her sister wanted my unusual name for their first daughter and I was older than my cousin, so my aunt called my cousin something different.

And my parents decided not to call my brother the name they originally chose because they knew so many babies called that, and they thought he would be one of three or four in a class.

So my family like people to have different names - but we all end up ‘family’ middle names. 😊

I think it’s fine. They are not characters in your show, they are their own family with their own lives.
my brothers kids name is George and we were thinking of naming one of our kids Georgina, it’s only occurred to me because of this thread that they’re even similar, because people just think about their own child and family when naming their kid. You’re not at the centre of their world or fire front of their minds and that’s normal.

Realistically, a child's 'nickname' in this scenario - especially when they're little - is going to just be in relation to their parents, particularly if they share a surname with the other child with the same/very similar name.

It's not enough for you to just be known as Grace in the family - it's going to be 'Sue & Tom's Grace'.

Your surname is already a clear subtle link to your family, but now you also have to be mentioned in terms of who your parents are, as your name alone is not sufficient to clearly identify you within your own family.

Where it’s a family name that’s been used in previous generations I get it. My cousin’s daughter shares my name which is a family name. Her daughter has the female version of my dad’s name. But where someone just uses virtually the same name their sibling chose then I think it’s very weird and shows a total lack of imagination and forethought if the cousins will see a lot of each other. In this situation it just seems odd.

My brother and my female cousin have very similar names, the short version is the same.
And actually when I think about my son had a similar name to his cousin. Not the same but of a similar vein.
Maybe it's a cultural thing for me so i completely get if it's not the done thing in your family it's a bit odd. There's 3 people in my family with my name, but we are all of different generations to be fair.

It does seem strange when there are thousands of names to choose from. Is the name special in some way to them? ( grandmother, late aunt)
I had two cousins, brother and sister, who called their children identical names. And it was the most popular baby name for both the years they were born so not as thought it was unique.

I think its odd OP.Seems Im in the minority though! I think this seems to happen a lot.My friend called her son the exact same name as my DS! I was surprised but my Son thought it was great.My friends had their in laws name their DS almost the same .as in Steve think Stevie type of thing.There are so many pretty names for girls

This is a non-issue. Loads of kids have friends who have identical or near identical names, it’s no different to that. Plus they could have chosen the name years ago or have some sentimental attachment to it. Anyway it is what it is, smile and move on.

???

"Why does the baby have my name?"
"Because it's a gorgeous name."

There, solved.

non event

You mean your brother has named his child a similar name?

It’s totally fine. It wasn’t worth creating a post never mind any additional thought.

It used to be the case that people followed naming traditions after other family members.

So John and Mary had 5 children and all their children had their own children named John and Mary.

Now we find it weird to do similar.

Funny how times change.

its strange how some find it weird it wouldn't bother me at all and in some cultures its normal for siblings to have the same name. I know one family where both brothers are called Mohammad and one where one brother is called Koshin and one called Koshar

I don’t get why it’s a problem! My mum had 2 x grandchildren with the exact same name they were always know us. Boy and girl both called Alex.

Why are you blaming SIL. Surely your DB is involved in this too?

it’s not uncommon to have repeat names in families especially if you’ve gone for classic names.

I suppose the proof of why names do matter is usernames on MN. Most people aren't selecting the same pool of names and adding numbers at the end to differentiate themselves . Imagine putting more thought into your MN username to differentiate yourself from internet strangers but questioning why a child needs a unique name in their immediate family.

Goes to show if most of us could choose our own names, we'd want something unique and memorable.

Pretty much every male in our extended family is named Richard or Robert. It’s not really a big deal.

My boyfriend’s brother and SIL named their first and second child almost identical names, think the Sophie/Sophia example.
I admit I did raise more than my eyebrows and to this day just think how could 2 adults lack so much imagination.

I did want to name my daughter a name but my cousin had her baby 3 months prior and used it so changed it, in reality though I should have stuck to my first choice as our lives rarely cross apart from big family events and it wouldn’t have had any impact.

I would find it strange and quite selfish, too. I mean, how much do they love the name, really?

It’s unfair to have two children in relatively small family with a similar name, it’s a child’s identity and they shouldn’t have to share that. It’s also odd that the parents didn’t run it past you first before the baby was born just to gauge your reaction, and why they couldn’t at least use it as a middle name. They haven’t acknowledged you or your child’s feelings.

People on here either get it or they don’t, but to me it smacks of entitlement and arrogance.

Maybe your SIL has loved the name for years, well before she knew you or your child was born. She’s got every right to use the name she loves. For all you know they’ve already had to not go with their first choice because that was your child’s name- eg they wanted Sophia but settled for Sophie.
They are cousins, not siblings - it’s really not a big deal. It’s not even the exact same name. As for your mum “having to” list her grandchildren’s names and two being similar- boo hoo how will she ever get over it 🙄.

Of course everybody can cope; but it's just a case of deliberately making things more complex when it was the most naturally avoidable thing in the world.

It's a bit like asking if your 4 children can cope sharing the tiny box room - which I'm sure they can - when you have 9 large 'spare' bedrooms in your house that never get used.

My son’s Godmother named her son the exact same name. There’s a 16 year age gap and she asked me first (she didn’t need to).

Both my son and I thought it was a huge compliment! We love that we have Big Joe and Little Joe (not the actual names). I think it’s really special. As a previous poster said, you wouldn’t use a name if it was the same as someone you knew but couldn’t stand.

So you'd prefer your child take on a nickname to be differentiated in immediate family rather than be born to a name that doesn't cause confusion? That sounds more like you have an idea of the baby you want rather than doing what's best for them. Not to mention your baby could be born not suiting the name at all. That's why so many kids grow up hating their names (or being bullied) because most parents aren't thinking about life with that name in their specific circumstances.