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Sister in law using same baby name

314 replies

Funinthesun20 · 25/03/2025 00:54

My sil has just given birth to my beautiful niece she and my brother have practically named the baby the same as my daughter 7.

Im talking close naming, think Grace/Gracie, Sophia/sophie, Rose/Rosie, Isabel/Isabella, Ella/Ellie….

Now, I know no-one has a right to a name and I know I don’t, that’s not what I’m saying, and I’m not even mad, just really confused! Surly when they were looking at names, they thought that one’s just like our nieces, not that one then? Like my husbands nephew is Theo and we liked Leo, but we thought that’s too close so moved on to other names.

Mine and my family’s reaction probably should have been better. But I was in complete shock when they told her name. I wasn’t rude, but my face said it all!

But the way they (sil and brother) are now acting as if they don’t have a clue why anyone would comment/react. As a lot of people are, as in family friends, wider family, even my work colleagues. Even my daughter is a bit confused “why does the baby have almost the same name as me?”
My mum is now laughing about having to list her grandchildren and say two with practically identical names!

I don’t know the point to this post I’m just…. Venting.

OP posts:
petiteoeuf · 25/03/2025 01:51

I must be weird because I find the thought of not caring about this absolutely baffling. I’m always so confused when people say they don’t find it a big deal because it would really stress me out! There are millions of names in the world, I just do not understand why people wouldn’t choose different ones. Unless it’s a family or meaningful name to them personally. My friends all think I’m a bit precious I think, and judging from the other replies on here I’ve definitely got issues 🤣, but I still can’t get my head round the idea of using the same/similar names in these sorts of situations!

NattyTurtle59 · 25/03/2025 01:24

It's a non event, honestly the number of threads I've seen over this Confused

How is it going to impact your life?

Delphiniumandlupins · 25/03/2025 01:24

Maybe they don't expect the children to be together very often? Maybe they're thinking of their baby with a middle name as well and not really clocked that Gracie Louise is very close to Grace? My parents have two grandchildren with the same first name, the children have never (in 13 years) met.

BeaAndBen · 25/03/2025 01:18

I don’t think it’s a big deal.

Sophie and Sophia might become Big Soph and Little Soph, but no one’s going to mix them up. If the age gap is big enough that your daughter can query it, they’re far enough apart in age.

Why is this your SIL issue and not your brother, OP?

CheeseWisely · 25/03/2025 01:13

I don’t get the big deal either, sorry. My SIL is currently pregnant and early on mentioned to DH that we (unknowingly!) used one of her favourite names for our 10 month old DS. When he relayed this back to me I told him to tell her to go ahead and use it if she loved it, doesn’t bother me at all. The family would figure out a way to differentiate them through nicknames or whatever.

Toddlerteaplease · 25/03/2025 01:12

It’s also a compliment to your daughter, as they wouldn’t use it if they didn’t like her!

Toddlerteaplease · 25/03/2025 01:11

I really can’t see the issue. It’s not the exact same name.

Thunderpants88 · 25/03/2025 01:11

Unless they live round the corner and your kids are constantly going to get mixed up when people are talking about them, then let it go.

you can reframe this. Be flattered theyxlike the same sooooooo much they couldn’t give up and move one

try taking it a compliment

Bournetilly · 25/03/2025 01:10

It’s very strange but without knowing the exact name it’s hard to say. Ella/ Ellie are very different names to me but Grace/ Gracie is basically the same.

The fact that they were acting like they didn’t know why anyone would think it was strange makes me think they haven’t realised just how similar the names are.

Bourbonbonbon · 25/03/2025 01:08

They just loved the name. It won't make any difference to your life.

user1492757084 · 25/03/2025 01:08

It's perfectly fine.
They have different surnames, hopefully.
Maybe your daughter's name was always your SIL favourite name and so rather than being exactly the same she has changed it slightly.

223Sunshine · 25/03/2025 01:08

They sound like self absorbed idiots. No one owns a name, they can do what they want but others are free to judge their lack of common sense.

RunLikeTheWild · 25/03/2025 01:06

I get that it feels weird, of all the names in the world and they choose one almost the same as your DD.
However I can see why they might have gone ahead with it id they absolutely loved the name. They've probably tried finding alternatives but just kept coming back to it.
And thought why shouldn't they use the name they want and love.

Fwiw my ds has a name that is one letter away from a similar name, and in my mind they are definitely two different names.

Tandora · 25/03/2025 01:00

I don’t get what the big deal is.