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Original poster

STOP calling people "a Karen"

385 replies

PaperwhiteTheFriendlyGhost · 24/03/2025 07:50

Why are people so lazy and ignorant? Ironically they use it in some instances to berate someone for a perceived insult. Maybe this should be on Pedants' Corner, I don't know.

OP posts:
KateDelRick · 24/03/2025 12:36

So instead of blaming white men for racism...target the women. Plus use a name used for older women.

tellmewhenthespaceshiplandscoz · 24/03/2025 12:35

Justyouwaitandseeagain · 24/03/2025 08:33

I know several women actually called Karen of different ages who are now concerned to share their name. All also happen to work in caring roles, and couldn't be further from the stereotype. The two I am closest two both have dead parents and it makes them really said that the name chosen by their much loved / loving parents has now developed such awful associations. This is not ok.

Ahhh but you see it is now ok because some women are horrible to retail staff 😳

tellmewhenthespaceshiplandscoz · 24/03/2025 12:32

Hardtotalkt · 24/03/2025 08:27

The American videos are justified. A lot of racist white women faking tears and being hurt.

This is fair regrading it’s origins but I have never heard it used IRL about this.

I have only ever heard it used to silence any (often polite) challenge/questioning of a situation by a woman over 30.

KateDelRick · 24/03/2025 12:30

TheaBrandt1 · 24/03/2025 12:27

Like we need another derogatory name for women to add to the fucking list 🙄🙄🙄

This ⬆️

Miffyhasbigears · 24/03/2025 12:29

MixedBananas · 24/03/2025 07:55

Nope. Its use is fine as they use Daren for men who are the "let me speak to your Manager type" paychos as well. I seen more Karens UN the wild then Darens , personally.

As a Woman it doesn't bother me because I don't rage in public at service workers or random citizens.

I don't rage at anyone - I'm super polite, but my name is Karen, so yes, it bothers me. I don't understand why it has to be an actual women's name. If someone is rude, racist or whatever, then call them out on that, don't tar everyone who has the same name.

TheaBrandt1 · 24/03/2025 12:29

Anecdotally never met a nasty Karen. That said every Jacqui I’ve met has been pure evil.

TheaBrandt1 · 24/03/2025 12:27

Like we need another derogatory name for women to add to the fucking list 🙄🙄🙄

KateDelRick · 24/03/2025 12:26

Miffyhasbigears · 24/03/2025 12:24

I hate it because my name is Karen, it gives me a jolt every time I hear it being used in a derogatory way, people also comment on it a lot. It makes it worse that I don't pronounce it in the usual way, so people assume I've changed the pronunciation because of the whole Karen thing (I haven"t).
I'd like to change it altogether, but it's the name my lovely Mum gave me and she'd be so hurt.

How awful. Your mum would be so upset. I have a friend called Karen who has been reduced to tears over this. She's such a lovely, kind person. It makes me angry.

Miffyhasbigears · 24/03/2025 12:24

I hate it because my name is Karen, it gives me a jolt every time I hear it being used in a derogatory way, people also comment on it a lot. It makes it worse that I don't pronounce it in the usual way, so people assume I've changed the pronunciation because of the whole Karen thing (I haven"t).
I'd like to change it altogether, but it's the name my lovely Mum gave me and she'd be so hurt.

BarneyRonson · 24/03/2025 12:08

It’s hate speech. Or shall we start calling fat obstreperous women Latisha.

Bogginsthe3rd · 24/03/2025 12:07

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

WiseUpJanetWeiss · 24/03/2025 12:05

Aside from all the very good points being made here is the fact that asking to speak to the manager is sometimes the right thing to do. If there’s a problem that the front line person can’t deal with and doesn’t understand, should you

a) walk away and forget that you’re out of pocket?
b) argue fruitlessly with the poor person stuck at the desk who isn’t paid enough for this shit?
c) ask to speak to someone who is in a position of responsibility?

DelphiniumBlue · 24/03/2025 11:22

It's clearly misogynistic.
Also, asking to speak to the manager usually means wanting to have a discussion with someone who has the authority to use their discretion, rather than someone who is blindly and often unhelpfully applying rules. How is that wrong? I'm sure we can all give examples of when that would be appropriate. The issue is that many businesses can't be bothered to listen to or interact with their paying customers and put low-paid workers with no authority on the front line to deal with customers who are rightly frustrated. The frontline workers are told to follow the company rules to the letter or risk losing their jobs.
There are many retailers now where you can't contact the store direct whether by email or phone to make enquiries.. they have decided that it's not worth employing sufficient staff to interact with the public.( Sainsburys, I'm looking at you specifically).

FrozenFeathers · 24/03/2025 11:07

charmanderflame · 24/03/2025 08:00

It does really surprise me when middle aged women use it about other middle aged women.

You are literally the demographic that this is insulting and belittling, why are you doing this?

I think it comes from a deep sense of self-loathing and lashing out as a way of deflecting their own feelings of inadequacy.

MrsKeats · 24/03/2025 10:08

It’s horrible ageism and misogyny. I hate it.

luckbug · 24/03/2025 09:27

Stellaris22 · 24/03/2025 08:32

A lot of the times when people talk about ‘shutting women up’ it’s usually because their behaviour has been called out and they don’t like it.

If you feel so personally attacked then maybe think about why someone has questioned your behaviour.

Obviously it’s not ok to insult someone but I understand why this term is used having seen the verbal abuse and derogatory way staff are treated.

Are you forgetting that this term happens to be the actual first name of many women?
How would you feel if your own name replaced this ‘term’ next?

There are many adjectives and nouns in the English language, why trash a person’s name?

AmIthatSpringy · 24/03/2025 09:24

These threads always get hijacked by the vocal few banging on about racists in America.

i will say the same as I say on every thread about this subject

its an ageist, misogynistic term used to shut women up. Those using it are thick, lazy and uneducated.

Violinist64 · 24/03/2025 09:23

I find it a misogynistic and ageist term. Karen was a very popular name in the fifties and sixties and l know several older ladies with the name. I dislike its lazy usage to put down the opinions of older women. I can think of no equivalent for men of any age.

AuntyAgony · 24/03/2025 09:21

I was livid when I heard my 8yo use the term Karen. It's clearly from YouTube videos or friends because I don't use it. I had to have some words and hopefully that will be the end of it.

andHelenknowsimmiserablenow · 24/03/2025 09:21

KateDelRick · 24/03/2025 09:18

No. Nor me. Then again, it's ok for men of all ages to be assertive.

Show quote history

Yes. This. It is fine for all men, young or old to speak up. But women over a certain age? Shut up or you will be publicly ridiculed until you submit to meekness.

Newmeagain · 24/03/2025 09:18

It is misogynistic and idiotic. It also makes the people who use that term sound really uneducated - which they usually are.

KateDelRick · 24/03/2025 09:18

andHelenknowsimmiserablenow · 24/03/2025 09:17

I have never heard the 'Daren' thing in the UK.

Show quote history

No. Nor me. Then again, it's ok for men of all ages to be assertive.

AmIthatSpringy · 24/03/2025 09:18

MixedBananas · 24/03/2025 07:55

Nope. Its use is fine as they use Daren for men who are the "let me speak to your Manager type" paychos as well. I seen more Karens UN the wild then Darens , personally.

As a Woman it doesn't bother me because I don't rage in public at service workers or random citizens.

Sorry, what?

andHelenknowsimmiserablenow · 24/03/2025 09:17

MixedBananas · 24/03/2025 07:55

Nope. Its use is fine as they use Daren for men who are the "let me speak to your Manager type" paychos as well. I seen more Karens UN the wild then Darens , personally.

As a Woman it doesn't bother me because I don't rage in public at service workers or random citizens.

I have never heard the 'Daren' thing in the UK.

BooomShakeTheRoom · 24/03/2025 09:08

I hate it too! Such an idiotic thing to say.