To want a dry wake for my sister?

If you can give the general area you're in OP, people may have venue recommendations?

I'm sorry for your loss. Have you considered hiring a posh food van? They often have add ons such as soft drinks bars/iced tea or coffee bars etc. You could hire a village hall or similar and book a food van plus drinks options.

PS.My condolences.

The undertaker was able to suggest a couple of catering companies that they called on regularly.They sorted it for us and we returned to the church hall after both DM and DF's funerals to a decent spread of sandwiches, cakes,tea and coffee.

We have had wakes in the church hall where the funeral was held, and one in a cafe at the crematorian. They didn’t serve alcohol.

We recently used a local cafe for a family members wake, so no alcohol, no one mentioned the fact there wasn’t any.

Sorry for your loss. If you can't find caterers but can find a church hall or village hall they should have a hot water urn and you could get disposable cups to make clearing up easier. At my brother's wake we had tea and cake, it wasn't a whole meal or anything.

We held the wake for DH's mum in the local village hall. We just had a few nibbles and sandwiches, cakes and cups of tea and coffee.

Ask the funeral directors. They often have a list.

If that doesn’t work, phone around a few local churches and ask - they’ll almost certainly know of caterers that use their venues.

If that doesn’t work, look up your local WI - they’re pretty much a version of the mafia and will be well clued up on funeral arrangements and catering options.

Also search office lunch catering in your area. That’s basically a funeral tea menu and no booze is standard for working lunches.

Try hotel function rooms.

Also our local football stadium had conference rooms that often cater funerals, it actually costs extra for them to open the bar so many choose the soft/hot drinks option!

My condolences. In view of what you say I would go further and - on the invitations - would add "We will not be serving alcohol and ask that you do not bring or consume alcohol"

@Welshyma

I would also let people know it going to be dry funeral do anyone triggered by alcohol can come comfortably and others who really want a drink can pop to pub first or be prepared , I am a hardly ever drinker but I’d really be wanting one after a funeral

I’d just have it at home, most people stand and do tea and cakes

If you private hire a venue you just request they don’t serve alcohol and tell them the circumstance. Usually they’ll have a minimum spend (which alcohol quickly racks up to) and you just pay it off instead. If you don’t want any alcohol you could try town/village hall. Or a hotel. sorry for your loss

Church hall, village hall- you provide the drinks so you control what is there

My mum's funeral tea was held in a hotel. We had a small function/meeting room and it didn't have a bar. Was at one lately in same hotel. They held it in the dining room of the hotel again no bar. Speaking to someone this morning talking about children's parties and they told me about someone she knew was hiring a church hall. They were told no alcohol was permitted.

Not everyone recovers in the same way or has the same feelings around it.

I'd personally suggest that if someone can't cope with attending a wake without needing alcohol, maybe they are the one with the problem.

Village hall or family home, order some platters of food from M&S- it will be cheaper than catering.

Why is it a problem if other people choose to drink? If they’re that tempted then they can’t have been in recovery long. I say this as a non-drinker who comes from a family of alcoholics (besides my mum!)
My brother is recovering and he says that being around people drinking strengthens his resolve….

Can you share where you are, I am sure the united powet of mumsnet can find you a venue.

My inlaws are teatotal and have hosted a number of family gatherings at dry venues.

I wish you luck, OP. How anyone would want to drink at a funeral or wake is beyond me.

I'm very sorry for your loss - this is a difficult one I agree.
Your best bet is a village hall, or church hall and arrange your own catering.
Failing that, maybe a local guest house with a dining room may oblige. Many of these don't have alcohol licences.

I've been to a wake at a crematorium where they offered catering and that was no alcohol served. Check if your venue does this.

Sorry for your loss. You're best bet is to hire a church or village hall and get outside caterers in. Then members of your family or friends can serve the tea/coffee. Hire of the hall almost always allows you use of their kitchen, urn and crockery etc.

We had my Dad's in a church hall. No alcohol in sight.
We ordered trays of sandwiches and some cakes from a local sandwich shop. Some friends of my Dad's made all the teas and coffees. We were able to use the tea making facilities in the church hall and use their crockery too.

The funeral wasn't at that church, it was at another church beforehand (one without a church hall) and there was no problem with us booking and using the hall even though the funeral service hadn't been held there.