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AIBU?

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WhHAT SHOULD I DO HELP PLEASE

147 replies

WarmDreamer · 23/03/2025 13:35

My grandson had a boy screaming at him trying to provoke my grandson to react as he has adhd we told him if kids do this then the best thing he could do is not to do anything and just walk away (which he done) the other child managed to run back into school and take a knife and ĥe rean at my grandson the teacher saw grabbed him and grabbed the knife the school rang my son and said that he didn't need to come in they were dealing with it the child has been sent home with an internal seclusion my son asked if they had reported this to the police and now the school has stopped any correspondence with my son and his wife he now doesn't want to send his children back to the school as he feels his children are not safe does he notify police himself? Does he send his kids back to school? Does he inform social services ? He really is at a l9ss as what would be the best thing to do I find it hard that the school let's these children do whatever they please some run out of school some swear and throw things around which my sons have done in the past one has already changed school and now is in a special school the other is still waiting for paperwork to be looked at by the special school but I will still have 2 chiĺdren at the school and this happened on primary school the children are 10 years old.

OP posts:
Megifer · 23/03/2025 15:48

Imagine being a total plonker over an op's (that was incredibly easy to understand) posting style when it's about a kid threatening their GC with a knife 🙄 cringing for those who have done this, you just look very silly.

Op if your DS is waiting for the school/trusting them to call the police I wouldn't. He should definitely call them and go into school tomorrow to discuss how they will keep his DS safe

TheTrainNowDeparting · 23/03/2025 15:40

Jeschara · 23/03/2025 15:20

Rubbish, you are just getting at someone's grammar and writing style. I have read it and understood it as as others.
Bad form to comment like that.

Spot on.

TeapotTitties · 23/03/2025 15:39

Riaanna · 23/03/2025 15:31

11 is the age of criminal responsibility.

It's 10 in England, Wales and NI.

Think it's older in Scotland.

Hoppinggreen · 23/03/2025 15:37

AnxiousOCDMum · 23/03/2025 15:34

I would then deregister my child until the process was completed as there is no way they would be stepping foot into the same building while the child was there.

Fair enough, you would have to hope that there was a place later when you felt your child could return to the school.
I am not saying its right, I am just explaining how hard it is to PX a child. I sit on PX panels and you would be horrified at some of the behaviour we CAN'T PX for.

JustSawJohnny · 23/03/2025 15:34

WarmDreamer · 23/03/2025 13:57

Teapottitties yes he knows he should report this but the only details he has is the school txt saying this has happened and we are dealing with it so he doesn't know if they reported it or not he's not told the boys name whether his parents are aware of the severity of this he doesn't know if the child has behaviour problems whether he has done anything like this before does the child have problems at home we know absolutely nothing

When did this happen, OP?

If it was Friday, remember no staff are in school or have access to your son's contact numbers over the weekend.

Staff may not be picking up emails, either.

The best bet is to report the incident, keep DGS off school and call them first thing tomorrow morning to demand a face to face meeting.

You cannot be forced to send DGS in if you have serious concerns for his welfare.

AnxiousOCDMum · 23/03/2025 15:34

Hoppinggreen · 23/03/2025 15:31

Well I hope there is the provision to Home school then and/or pay fines for non attendance because PX ing a Pupil can take months or even more.
And THATS only if all boxes are ticked on a very lengthy and in depth process

I would then deregister my child until the process was completed as there is no way they would be stepping foot into the same building while the child was there.

AnxiousOCDMum · 23/03/2025 15:33

Riaanna · 23/03/2025 15:31

11 is the age of criminal responsibility.

It’s aged 10 in England.

Hoppinggreen · 23/03/2025 15:31

AnxiousOCDMum · 23/03/2025 15:28

I think at age 10 the police can be involved and the child can be charged, if you wish you to pursue this.

The school will be reluctant to escalate this as they have failed to safeguard.

Absolutely report to the police. Write an email to state that your grandson will not be returning until the child is permanently excluded.

Edited

Well I hope there is the provision to Home school then and/or pay fines for non attendance because PX ing a Pupil can take months or even more.
And THATS only if all boxes are ticked on a very lengthy and in depth process

Riaanna · 23/03/2025 15:31

AnxiousOCDMum · 23/03/2025 15:28

I think at age 10 the police can be involved and the child can be charged, if you wish you to pursue this.

The school will be reluctant to escalate this as they have failed to safeguard.

Absolutely report to the police. Write an email to state that your grandson will not be returning until the child is permanently excluded.

Edited

11 is the age of criminal responsibility.

Riaanna · 23/03/2025 15:30

WarmDreamer · 23/03/2025 13:52

Dear coldstream25 the school won't give the boys name what they are doing about it they have completely stopped correspondance

They aren’t allowed to give the other child’s name. They would be breaking the law. You don’t need the name to report it.

MoveOverMoon · 23/03/2025 15:30

I would talk to the police directly OP if I were your son. They can investigate.

AnxiousOCDMum · 23/03/2025 15:28

WarmDreamer · 23/03/2025 13:47

Basically a child managed to take a knife from school dining area and tried to stab my grandson and the school won't reply to my son so my son does not know what they r doing should he call 101 himself and should he send his son back to school when he feels it to be unsafe these children are in Yr 5 age 10

I think at age 10 the police can be involved and the child can be charged, if you wish you to pursue this.

The school will be reluctant to escalate this as they have failed to safeguard.

Absolutely report to the police. Write an email to state that your grandson will not be returning until the child is permanently excluded.

MoveOverMoon · 23/03/2025 15:28

CoffeeFluff · 23/03/2025 13:38

This is absolutely impossible to read.

No it’s not. Your post is mean.

Cucy · 23/03/2025 15:28

If this was a boy working in isolation then I would have no concerns about sending my child back.

I would report it to the police because although very little will be legally done, the least they can do is speak to the boy and tell him of the consequences.

I worked with SEND kids and a couple of times had the police in to show them how serious some of their behaviour is and if they carried on/did it outside of school then they could get arrested.

Your son and his wife didn’t need to be there for the meeting, as they would have been about the boy.

They can still request a meeting of their own though and in this meeting I’d be asking how they can assure that they can keep your son safe when this boy comes back.

The absolute first thing that needs to be addressed is how a knife was so easily accessible in a school with such young kids.

Lougle · 23/03/2025 15:26

Apreslapluielesoleil · 23/03/2025 15:15

Your son calls 101 says he wants to repirt an attempted assault with a bladed weapon.
He gives his son’s name , the name of the school, the day and approximate time the incident happened.
His home address and phone number too.
Then leave it to the police.

It’s a criminal offence, even if the child is under 10 it has to be investigated.
Im glad your grandson wasn’t injured but must have been terrifying for him.

@WarmDreamer follow this advice, then email the school to say that you need to know how they are going to safeguard your child from further incidents. Just be clear that you're interested in what they will do for your GS, not what they are doing about the other child.

verycloakanddaggers · 23/03/2025 15:25

CoffeeFluff · 23/03/2025 13:38

This is absolutely impossible to read.

It really isn't.

Lougle · 23/03/2025 15:23

Chuchoter · 23/03/2025 14:13

Thank you @FortyElephants the op's post was understandably hysterical but very difficult to make sense of.

No way would I let the children go back to that school. The police do need to be told and yes social services.

Everyone is saying how hard it was to read. It really wasn't. What is the point of piling on to say how hard it was to read?

It's simple. Boy goaded, other boy grabbed knife, teacher intervened so no damage done, but clearly distressed. What should they do?

FarmGirl78 · 23/03/2025 15:20

You don't need to know the name of the child. You don't need to know if they are a already known to social services. You don't need to know if they've got behavioural problems. You don't need to know if it's happened before. You don't need to know what their home life is like. You don't need to know their shoe size either. You just need to inform the police.

Jeschara · 23/03/2025 15:20

CoffeeFluff · 23/03/2025 13:38

This is absolutely impossible to read.

Rubbish, you are just getting at someone's grammar and writing style. I have read it and understood it as as others.
Bad form to comment like that.

Apreslapluielesoleil · 23/03/2025 15:15

Your son calls 101 says he wants to repirt an attempted assault with a bladed weapon.
He gives his son’s name , the name of the school, the day and approximate time the incident happened.
His home address and phone number too.
Then leave it to the police.

It’s a criminal offence, even if the child is under 10 it has to be investigated.
Im glad your grandson wasn’t injured but must have been terrifying for him.

KateDelRick · 23/03/2025 15:11

Do you know that the school haven't called the police, for sure?

Ihopeyouhavent · 23/03/2025 15:09

The school dont want to involve the police because the knife was made accessible by them.

My son sadly was involved in knife crime, but the school took responsibility and called the police before they called anyone else.

Call the police ASAP. And the father needs to go to the school Monday morning to find out exactly what they are doing to keep yr DG safe.

KateDelRick · 23/03/2025 15:07

sandyhappypeople · 23/03/2025 15:00

I think people are just being intentionally picky, It is easy enough to follow, but saying that, OP relays all of this information about her son and her grandson (who was the one almost attacked), but then at the end paragraph goes on to say that she has two 10 year old children still at that school??

I find it hard that the school let's these children do whatever they please some run out of school some swear and throw things around which my sons have done in the past one has already changed school and now is in a special school the other is still waiting for paperwork to be looked at by the special school but I will still have 2 chiĺdren at the school and this happened on primary school the children are 10 years old.

Not sure what that's about? or if I am misreading that part?

I think it sounds like she has four grandsons in the school and one has gone to a school with different specialist provisions and one is waiting for the paperwork.

TheBroonOneAndTheWhiteOne · 23/03/2025 15:02

sandyhappypeople · 23/03/2025 15:00

I think people are just being intentionally picky, It is easy enough to follow, but saying that, OP relays all of this information about her son and her grandson (who was the one almost attacked), but then at the end paragraph goes on to say that she has two 10 year old children still at that school??

I find it hard that the school let's these children do whatever they please some run out of school some swear and throw things around which my sons have done in the past one has already changed school and now is in a special school the other is still waiting for paperwork to be looked at by the special school but I will still have 2 chiĺdren at the school and this happened on primary school the children are 10 years old.

Not sure what that's about? or if I am misreading that part?

I think she means that the children in this incident are ten.

Her grandson and the boy who tried to attack him must be in Y6.

Presumably there is also a younger child at the same school.

sandyhappypeople · 23/03/2025 15:00

TheBroonOneAndTheWhiteOne · 23/03/2025 14:47

It isn't.

The OP has made the salient points.

Yes, it lacks punctuation but it's not impossible to comprehend what she's saying.

I think people are just being intentionally picky, It is easy enough to follow, but saying that, OP relays all of this information about her son and her grandson (who was the one almost attacked), but then at the end paragraph goes on to say that she has two 10 year old children still at that school??

I find it hard that the school let's these children do whatever they please some run out of school some swear and throw things around which my sons have done in the past one has already changed school and now is in a special school the other is still waiting for paperwork to be looked at by the special school but I will still have 2 chiĺdren at the school and this happened on primary school the children are 10 years old.

Not sure what that's about? or if I am misreading that part?