Please, please, please put away your phones...

Absolutely not. You need to do your own research as doctors are not always correct. And they weren't correct this time as we had to go back a second time. You should always go with a idea of what could be wrong. Children do pass away because they have been failed by doctors so always do your own research aswell.

Completely agree...it's the 24 hour nature of it which really does the damage.
Go back to the computer in the corner; I don't have a smartphone, never have, because I could see how addictive they are. I have an ipad, but treat it like a desktop....it is rarely moved, certainly not out of the house.

They were on social media x

The fact that the family were out at 11pm isn’t an issue in my opinion.
They could have been travelling, could even be on a different time zone 🤪, the little one could have had a very late afternoon nap for example.
The ignoring the little one while she scrolled a fashion website isn’t something I’d ever do .
Needing to quickly text or WhatsApp or a short reply to an important email that’d be different .
I am older so when my children were little I engaged with them , looked out of bus/ train windows ,got toys , colouring books / sticker books out in cafes , chatted to them .
Screen time was children’s TV at home for quiet downtime and a break for me .
And I did it on my own I had no help , no babysitter, no relatives to take them off my hands

I judged you by your responses your here. You followed the question with

'Fuck me, the lengths people are going to on this thread to justify ignoring their children is amazing and are completely missing he point.'

That really doesn't sound like you are curious.

"Do you not think....." is not asking a genuine question. It's using a question to tell someone you think your way is better. It's a judgement, not a curious question.

I asked a question, was curious as to the thinking that's all. Because it is was me and my child was in distress, I would be comforting or distracting them, rather than trying to diagnose my child via Goggle, when I am sat in a hospital full of medical people.
Wasn't judging, I was, you know, asking questions so I could understand the rationale, the answer could have changed my view.

How do you know I do not have the tools to be a good parent by the way?
Although I happen to agree with you. I ignored my children when they needed me, preferring to have a few drinks because I had a bad day and needed to distract myself.

I asked a question, was curious as to the thinking that's all. Because it is was me and my child was in distress, I would be comforting or distracting them, rather than trying to diagnose my child via Goggle, when I am sat in a hospital full of medical people.

Wasn't judging, I was, you know, asking questions so I could understand the rationale, the answer could have changed my view.

You told a parent how she should react in A&E. You appear to lack empathy and do not have the capacity to self reflect. You really don't seem to have the tools to be a good parent. And yet here you are, judging others.

Do you not think it would have been better to comfort your child and waited for the HCP to diagnose (rather then Google) given that you were in A & E?

Your words. To a parent telling you why they were on a phone in a&e.

Knee jerk reaction. Did you read my post or do you just want to feel like you have something to say? (another reason we are all fucked)

It doesn't say anywhere in my post about judging parents in A & E. I am judging parents who ignore their children when the children need their attention.

I am one of those few adults that can walk without eyes glued to their phones. If I get a text or call whilst walking, I usually step away from the main flow of pedestrians. Cannot have full concentration when walking and texting.

Christ, you're a nasty piece of work. You would really sit in A&E judging Mums?!

It doesn't. But in reality, if your kid isn't up to much interaction cos they're unwell, hence being in a&e, there's not much else you can do to distract yourself in that scenario. And that's the one I'm referring to.

Last time I was in a&e with DD there were no magazines to flick through, some random kids programme was on the TV in the waiting area and she didn't want to talk to me, she just wanted a cuddle.

I was worried. I had her on my lap and cuddled in, but I needed to not be running through the possibilities in my mind. So to distract myself, whilst waiting and giving my child the comfort she needed (not the comfort strangers on the internet deem satisfactory), I did things like message DH to let him know how she was, message grandparents to let them know. Looked at things we needed to purchase for her, and us. Checked my emails. I distracted my mind from going mad.

It's not neglecting your child to look at your phone during a long a&e wait.

I think the defensive whataboutery on this thread says a lot

In a way the example is not a good one as the late hour side tracked the overall point. Most of us see examples similar to ops day in day out during daytime many stated in this thread.

Ok, but why does distracting oneself mean scrolling on your phone?

Fuck me, the lengths people are going to on this thread to justify ignoring their children is amazing and are completely missing he point.

You think a child in distress knows you are looking at insta or trying to find answers as to what's wrong with them. The message is the same.. I want comfort but parent is ignoring me.

We are fucking doomed.

Maybe they'd been there hours with noone seeing them yet? Maybe they were ridiculously stressed and trying to find answers stopped them breaking down in front of their child.

My friend was crying while waiting in a&e with her child once. She had someone tell her she should have distracted herself so as not to do so in front of her kid.

Mums can't win.

Do you not think it would have been better to comfort your child and waited for the HCP to diagnose (rather then Google) given that you were in A & E?

I done this in a&e searching to try and find out what could be wrong with my daughter, I didn't even think at the time someone's probably looking at me thinking I'm a awful parent.

I agree. I absolutely hate my phone. If I had a choice I wouldn't have one, so much is done on a phone now so it's needed.

At 11pm, they have coped with the hell of a day. The day is almost over.

The child wasn't upset, probably staring into space due to tiredness.

Because it was 11pm.

Well said.

You've reminded me of Victoria Wood describing childhood in the 1950s! Along the lines of... two years in your pram in the garden, looking at leaves; three years standing by the garden gate in a coat and woolly hat, watching people walk by; then one day, to your amazement, they shoved you in a room with thirty other people, all the same size as you!

Why doesn't anyone on here seem to think keeping a child awake at 11pm is crap parenting? Why shouldn't a child be encouraged to sleep? The OP hasn't said the DC was upset. People scream neglect on this thread enough but we know sleep is important to development. Why does noone care about that?

WRT your other point, noone can be on their best every day. Some people go through truly traumatic circumstances. There is every chance that could have happened here. I don't believe if you'd been through something horrendous, you would really say that.

100% truth. Completely agree with everything you've said 👏