Reception DD Being Assaulted

That doesn't sound right.

Have a look on the school website. That should list the members of the Board of Governors - and the Safeguarding Policy (a legal requirement) should have the contact details for the Governor responsible for Safeguarding.

The TA could be in attendance because they're also acting as Clerk or they were there specifically because it was a meeting about your child.

If it's a maintained school, there should (if they could find one) be a local authority Governor, but you can complain to the LA in any case about both your specific concerns and that the governance isn't following their terms of reference. If it's part of a MAT, then there's the Academy Trust to contact.

You should also be able to access the complaints procedure on the school website - and as the complaint would basically be about the Head now, you go to that stage instead of the first or second stage.

They will be quite sensitive about absences, too - if she were to be off sick due to injuries, that would be far harder for them to get the LA to agree to put you forward for a penalty charge than 'keeping her off school for her safety'. As long as you follow the absence procedure to the letter and confirm that she is off sick due to an injury at the hands of x child.

I have to speak up for different reasons at school and wouldn't normally be able to, but I focus on my kids and find strength for them. These people are behaving horribly, they're letting a little child get hurt over and over rather than try and fix what is going wrong. I'd take the tack a PP suggested "You need to ask the school what is being done to safeguard your daughter. Since she has had so many unexplained injuries, what kind of risk assessment have they put in place in order to forestall future injuries?" Focus on the fact that the amount and extent of the injuries normal and they need to safeguard your DD from injury no matter how it is happening. My youngest has a tendency to throw himself around without regard for safety so school kept an eye on him and encouraged him to slow down and take more care and he stopped coming home with so many bruises. There is an issue here and they need to address why your DD is getting so many bad injuries. What's happening isn't ok and they're pretty shit people to stand by and let this happen. Good luck I hope you're meeting helps, but even more I hope you can get a transfer, I'd never fully trust these people again.

OP, I hope you have the photos with date stamp and copies of incident report (you should have been given that).
Split lip or black eye is not a „head bump”

Your DH should get out of his quietness and stand up for his child.

Let them speak first and see what they have to say. Take a screenshot of your child and her tormentor and ask they how are they keeping them apart because here’s the proof that they aren’t.

Be an absolute PITA and repeat like a broken record your statements which are proved by photos.
Ask them how are they going to keep your child safe?

School has a duty of care to every child and they are failing your daughter very badly.

I’d also log your DD injuries with GP. If your DD has been coming to school with the injuries already you’d have social services on your back ages ago.

Communicate with school in writing to create a trail,even to summarise the phone convo/meeting.

At the end of the school inform them that you will be going to GP (because I’d go if I was you) and then police.Mentioning local press won’t do any harm.

Do it for your DD otherwise her bully might go further and she’ll end up with more serious injury (broken limb,concussion?)

In the meantime push hard for a school transfer. Write everywhere you can.

If your DD comes back home with another injury pull her out of school and made them aware of that.

Good luck 💐

Whilst I don’t doubt it will cause trauma. It’s not as easy as pull her out of school. The OP probably works and has a job the income for which is necessary for their household.

op, if it’s not done already, but you sound very on it. Meeting with the head.

then govenors,

ofsted

the lado (safeguarding leading for the local authority)

local MP to get her moved and then I’d be writing to the local press

the child who is attacking yours shouldn’t be in the same class and if they are unable to not attack children at break they shouldn’t be allowed for break. But generally speaking it’s really worrying that how a child so young acts. There should be serious questions as to that child’s home life

Re: calling the police - at this age you aren’t calling the police to arrest/punish the other four year old (which I agree would seem pointless as they are much too young for legal criminal responsibility) - you are calling them on the school itself, which isn’t upholding legal safeguarding duties given the ongoing pattern of injury.

As an ex Governor this doesn't sound right. Normally there will be the head teacher and one staff representative. There should also be one parent rep and the others made up of other people with no connection to children at the school.

@kurotora it might be helpful if for the meeting you explain the timeline and any records of incidents/ mitigating actions the school have put in place that haven’t worked. Write everything down and take it with you. Best of luck

Someone will move out of the area soon enough, so keep up pressure on the council to find you another school place. It sounds like the boy has some fixation on your DD for whatever reason, so that is unlikely to change. We had similar and I wish we had not left it so long believing that the school were trying when they were not.

Thanks for the update, I've been thinking about you and your DD and really hoping it gets sorted. Hopefully tomorrow will help. Write a list of the points you want to make so you don't forget anything with the stress etc. Good luck!

Am I misreading that the governors are made up of the Head and Teachers? That isn’t right surely?

What an absolute nightmare. How long has this been going on for? The school's response is awful.

I am surprised that you're saying homeschooling is not an option to be honest - whatever the circumstances, hard as it is, I would move heaven and earth to stop this happening to my kids. Obviously the best solution is a different school that can immediately take her but if that's not happening, then it'd be home school or childminder/nursery, since she's still under mandatory school age.

But in the meantime, honestly I'd contact anyone and everyone with so much as a name badge. Ofsted, governors, LA, media outlets, local MP. If ever there was a time you need to lose your shit, it's now!

If they're Ofsted outstanding they probably care about attendance stats. Personally I'd keep her off until you've had a meeting with the head and seen a plan of action re how they will keep her safe going forwards.

Also agree with PPS saying get a paper trail for everything. If the accident form says "head bump" but your daughter tells you that Billy did it then email and tell them that.

You need to ask the school what is being done to safeguard your daughter. Since she has had so many unexplained injuries, what kind of risk assessment have they put in place in order to forestall future injuries?

Can you ask to see proof of the fall in the playground each and every time? Cameras, witnesses, teacher on yard duty? Failing that I'd stand outside the school gates every day writing down proof of any incident that took place, date, time, what happened.

You can't keep sending your 4 year old somewhere she is being ASSAULTED regularly, ffs! You need to take some responsibility to keep your child safe too.

I'm so sorry you're going through this - it must be incredibly upsetting for both you and DD. If escalating to the teacher then head hasn't worked, you then need to report to the governing body of the school. If that doesn't work, appeal and go to the LEA and OFSTED. The school have failed in their duty of care to your child - these are significant injuries. Continue to document everything - pictures, dates, all forms of communication etc. if you can't take your child out of the school, this is likely the only way forward. Has any other child been injured due to this boy's actions? If so, get them to do the same.

My youngest was one for lashing out (recently diagnosed with autism) but this was very swiftly dealt with and kept under control, and he never hurt anyone in the same way your daughter has been hurt - it was more a case of being caught in the crossfire when he was kicking on the floor. It sounds like this young boy is likely to be going through something he needs additional support with, but the school needs to create a safe space for both him AND his classmates.

I’m so sorry this is happening
to your daughter. it’s not acceptable and it is assault.

I went through exactly the same thing with my 4 year old when she started school. Tried addressing with school who minimised. I was very lucky to be able to move her at October half term; she settled quickly and was best thing I could ever have done!

if you can’t move her or don’t want to yet, put EVERYTHING in writing and litter with “safeguarding” and “bullying”. Reference the policies and complain to the head, and if head takes no interest to the governors. Don’t let it drop. It’s not ok.

wishing you all the best. X

By contrast, my DD is in reception and was bitten by another kid this week. She's had a couple of pushing incidents from him before (put it this way, we knew who she would say bit her before she told us), but nothing left a mark previously. For the biting incident, her teacher called us, explained the situation and the consequence the other child was given, then told us she would be ringing his parents immediately after speaking with us. That's the response I would have expected, and I think it's what you should expect too.

Edit: sorry, I mean that's what you should expect from your school for the type of injury my DD has. For the multiple injuries yours had I would expect A LOT more of a reaction from the school.

Autism is a communication disorder/difference that manifests differently in different people. If it makes it very difficult for your daughter to initiate communication (go up to people and start talking) then they need to be proactive in supporting her just like they should for any other difference or disability. If they had a child with developmental delays who wasn't yet verbal they would have to support this situation more proactively and it should be no different just because your daughter is theoretically capable of saying what has happened. Neither does it make any difference if other autistic students the teacher or head or SENCO have known before did not struggle with this aspect of communication. What matters is that your daughter does.

If they don't start accepting responsibility start talking about the Equality Act and the need to provide reasonable adjustments for children with disabilities, which would include adjustments for social communication difficulties as part of autism. If they can't see the problem, use an analogy. Let's say a child has a hearing impairment. The school wouldn't say "she just needs to listen more carefully, she doesn't need hearing aids". Or if she struggled with shortsightedness, they wouldn't say "she can see things far away if she tries harder". They would allow her to use glasses to support the area of weakness. This is the same, she has a communication difficulty as part of a diagnosed condition and the school needs to support that, by proactively keeping the children apart, checking in with her, and making sure she is ok.

I would email Ofsted about the schools failure to keep your child safe while she is in their care. Mention the schools responses are poor and they are putting your child in danger. Your child also has a disability and is being victimised and yet again they are failing under the Disability Act to make sure your child is being treated as an equal.
The other child needs someone (SNA )with them all the time if they are violent. Why is his right to education and being safe trumping your daughters right to the same? I would mention gender discrimination, based on the fact he is a boy attacking a girl . I would also inform them that you will sue the school on behalf on your child if measures are not put in place asap to keep the children apart and that your daughter can go about her day without fear of being attacked.

Hit them with everything you can and if necessary go see a solicitor and use the disability act and equal status act as well as gender discrimination - that puts the fear of God into everyone

We used to have this too and I was told I was being intolerant of the other child's additional needs. It only stopped after I became a governor.

The school are failing in their legal duty of care and this is a safeguarding issue, as per KCSIE (legal guidance setting out all schools’ obligations). Their Child Protection policy should be readily available to you - likely on their website. If it isn’t, demand to see it. Involve the SENDCO: your DD has a disability so point out that by failing to make reasonable adjustments for her communication difficulties they are indirectly discriminating against her. Saying “she needs to tell us” is not good enough and they know it. Stating that their behaviour is discriminatory should get them to sit up a bit. You need to start getting really assertive here: it should all be in writing, referencing their duty to safeguard the children in their care, the injuries photographed and dated. Repeated physical injuries are evidence of their utter failure to fulfil their legal obligations: state this as bluntly as possible.

If all else fails, remove her and get a solicitor to write a letter. That should put a rocket up them. Ex-teacher and this kind of thing makes my blood boil. There are some really shit teachers out there (not all, before anyone gets upset!).