Reception DD Being Assaulted

If they continue to be obstructive, you could always mention to them that you are considering reporting the school to the police for neglect, and for negligently allowing your child to be abused by another child, despite repeated request from you asking them to look after her.

Bloody hell, if I knew where in the country you were, I’d come with you. The school is absolutely not doing its job here. Keep calm, become a broken record if necessary. Point to their own procedures and rules, just as you have been doing. I’m so angry for you - this gives us teachers a bad name.

Make sure someone minutes the meetings and send a written summary of it to all attendees, stating where there was disagreement e.g. “We stated that during meetings with (staff name), they said that X had happened. Ms Y (Head Teacher) said that this was not the case”. Keep it as absolutely unemotional as possible in your language.

I'm sorry the meeting was so confrontational for you and the head smirking is disgraceful.

It sounds like you did really well - give yourself a pat on the back.

The school changing it's stance on being aware of this violence is absolutely not on. They simply can't be allowed to back track on this!

I agree with the other person who suggested you try and get some help from a charity that offers advocacy help and could maybe attend future meetings with you.

Also suggested before that you might like to seek help from your local councillor and/or MP though elected politicians can vary enormously in how helpful they are.

I think the school are being defensive because they know you are 100% in the right here. You have rattled them and they are staring to see you as a force to be reckoned with. Keep up the good work you will get there in the end if you keep going!

Please report to Ofstead.

They do not deserve an ‘outstanding’ report if this is what is occurring. Lay the school’s failings on thick. Document, document, document.

I'm glad that you weren't on your own.

OP this sounds so awful and frustrating.gasligting you.

I'd be thinking about a council/MP complaint becomes a 4 years old regardless of Leeds shouldn't be blamed for not speaking up too adults who aren't keeping her Safe.

“Duty of care” needs to be repeated in any correspondence with them. They have a duty of care to your daughter. Make them aware you know that. Go above them OP as the issue will suddenly become more of a priority to the school.

OP I would email the Head now, outlining what has been agreed so it can’t be denied later on and copy in the individual in charge of complaints about that school, eg in my area it would be the Local Council Education Dept. Find out who that is and get their email address. The Head can find that funny. As an ex teacher myself, don’t put up with this. Make them wary of you and what you will do next. The response you’ve been getting is far from professional and it needs to stop.

She’s 4, just a baby. This is fucking awful.

I wouldn’t be sending her!

I wonder whether you might be able to get advice here, OP? My cousin's wife was getting nowhere with her son's LA until she contacted a charity. They sent a rep to the follow-up meeting. (In her case, it was the Tourette's society: her son was diagnosed with Asperger's, ADHD and Tourette's.)

www.autism.org.uk/advice-and-guidance/help-and-support

I'm sorry - I should have thought to say this before: if you have a meeting at school you're entitled to take a supporter with you. If you have to go back in, try to take a family member or friend with you.

The HT can smirk as much as she likes: she's totally in the wrong and it's her job that will be on the line if it's found that she doesn't have proper safeguarding procedures in place.

You need to move her ASAP. She is not safe at this school.

OP, they sound hopeless. I'm glad they're doing something but honestly, is this going to get better? Your DD will be there for seven years. What if some other incident happens way down the line? What if she starts being bullied by more people?

Is there really no way you can pull her out?

There is no point making a fuss, school have already been clear that they plan to deny incidents. All OP can do is remove her child and escalate complaints once the child is safe.

This! Make a huge fuss. This is totally unacceptable

Oh I know what you mean now. Trash breeds the next generation of trash.

I would be going to the lado (local area designated officer) at your local authority, submitting any photographs you have. It's clear they are failing to safeguard a very vulnerable young child. Ofsted won't do anything other than pass it onto them.

The names of all governors should be on the school website. Usually there is the head and 1 staff governor and you might get the deputy head as an associate governor but there are other roles within a governing board that staff cannot take on. I would also make a formal written complaint to the chair of governors.

Then finally I would make a subject access request requesting any information the school hold on your daughter (you'll find a template on the IPSEA website). You'll be surprised how often I've had parents I've been supporting discover that things were happening they didn't know about solely from their child's paperwork!

Definitely go in with a record of all your child’s injuries, their comments about the cause of injuries and ideally any pictures you took of the injuries. Go through the record with the school in detail and ask them the following.
What have they done to keep your child safe?
Do they think what they have done has been good enough?
How have they adhered to their own bullying and safeguarding policies?
How do they intend to keep your child safe in the future?
What emotional support are they providing to your child to cope with her experiences of abuse in the school setting?
What is the formal complaint process for the school?

I just want to add my sympathy as I was your daughter once, @kurotora. As a barely-five year-old I was physically beaten up at playtimes by two much bigger boys - this was a long time before the current 'Year x' system but they were in their final year, so more than twice my age.

I too was a quiet, painfully shy child who couldn’t/didn't know how to speak out, but I vividly remember crying at morning break times because I knew I’d have to go outside and I knew I’d be hit. I still couldn’t explain to a teacher. Eventually my mother saw the bruises and went straight to the school. Again, it was years before the kind of policies now in place but the headteacher unleashed her considerable wrath on the boys and the violence stopped.

I feel so upset to think about your little girl enduring this, and you and your DH must be beside yourselves. There’s been such good advice on this thread - I hope it helps and that the meeting with the school goes well, but please push it. I can’t believe how casual they’re being about this awful situation.

With those type of injuries I would almost be on the verge of police involvement! I know you can't actually do it as the offender is also a child . Absolutely heartsick for you. Noone seems to be taking this seriously.

This! ⬆️ The school are failing in their duty of care towards your daughter. It's a huge safeguarding issue. Formal complaint, removal & don't let it go; Governors, LA, local press if necessary.

I had this too. Loads of bruising. Some incidents where she didn’t tell teacher, but others where she was adamant a teacher/ supervising adult had seen. A teacher that was leaving for maternity leave was helpful and confirmed a couple of incidents but the rest went unrecorded on their systems. Some (poor) schools care more for their own reputation / lack of hassle than the kids, and it’s toxic. Good luck getting her out asap