If you don’t contribute to the collection you shouldn’t sign the card

I wish all workplaces would ban the practice of whip-rounds/collections for any occasion, other than retirement. A big card signed by everyone is fine, but no call for a gift. It’s tedious, people hate being asked for money, and who really gives a crap whether their work colleagues mark their birthday/wedding/new baby? These are all private life events, nothing to do with work. If some of your work colleagues are also your friends in your private life, let them mark it privately, same as your other family and friends.

Then there’s the popularity problem - everyone thinks young Kate in Reception is a right laugh and contributes to her collection, but poor old Jane in Accounts who just gets on with her work quietly gets overlooked because she doesn’t go to the pub on Fridays. The whole practice is rubbish.

Love that.

I’ve not read all of the comments so apologies if it has already been said.

get a second card, ask the people who gave you money to sign it, then stick it on the front of the present or inside the gift bag.

’There’s a gift and a card for your birthday, there is also another card from all of us in the office’

We have a relatively small team (15 in total) and always do money sent to one person and then a gift bought. Not everyone sends the same amount or at all and that’s ok because we’re not all paid the same or have the same financial responsibilities or indeed the same relationship with the recipient. Everyone is allowed to sign the card though.

I think you’re half correct and I can see why it would annoy you. But I’d not offer to get a card off everyone and just for those who contribute sign the one you get.

However money is so tight for a lot of people and I can’t afford to transfer £5 as I need that for living. So this could be why people aren’t transferring. And even those who earn well- my husbands an example- I don’t work- we have 1 salary , it all goes so he is perceived to earn well but when it has to go along way we don’t have spare cash.

When I organise collections at work, I allow bank payments and cash. Different roles at my work place have vastly different salary levels. It's easier for people wanting to donate a small amount to give cash anonymously, whereas online £5 or £10, or even higher, are the usual donations. People don't want to look stingy 'publicly' - even though only I have access, they know I will know and don't know whether others might not find out too.

As for signing the card - I do feel only contributors should but I don't police it. Because of anonymous cash donations, I'm not sure anyway. But in my job we only collect for big events like moving on or a baby, not birthdays. And most card signers have donated.

I liked the favourite biro part. I'd be friends with the OP on the strength of that alone.

If I was the recipient I would probably be a bit upset if only five people signed the card. It’s better to get 30 people sending best wishes surely? The card and the gift are two distinct things; it’s not “pay to sign”. The value of the gift will make it clear that not everyone contributed and the five that paid can feel good about themselves in the knowledge that they were the more generous people. If any of these people want to be recognised for their generosity then perhaps they should give gifts individually?

Nobody should feel obliged to contribute and it’s grim that bank details are used so you know who has done it. In future let people drop some cash in an envelope like in the old days.

An opposite version of this used to annoy me at my old workplace. A collection envelope would go around and more often than not I’d contribute, but then there’d be no follow-up card to sign. After making a point of asking a few times if the card could be passed around at the same time as the collection envelope to avoid missing out and nothing changed, I stopped contributing.

This. It's better to have a small gift and good wishes from lots of people than a small gift and a tiny handful of comments in a card. I'm assuming this is a big card you've bought, based on the fact 30 people could be signing.

Of course it would be nice if everyone chucked a couple of quid in the pot, but they don't only get access to the card if they do that - that completely defeats the object.

Personally I don’t think there should be collections at work. It’s awkward and just ends up going in a circle eventually. I never do collections when my staff leave - I get a card for everyone to sign and then I get the person a small gift

The important thing is the person leaving has well wishes from colleagues and everyone possible signing the card !

Isn't the end goal here to make the colleague feel special? So 30 people signing rather than 5 will make her feel special?

Me. There’s not a cat in hell’s chance that I’d allow any of my colleagues to get their hands on it, however. And it’s not a biro either.

I have a 'lucky pen'!

Who has a favourite biro?!

Wrap the gift with a separate gift tag and write the contributors’ names on that. Treat the card as representing a wider group who want to pass on their good wishes.

So buy your own card?

Who shares their bank details on a work WA? Why be in a work WA group? Or, more pressingly, what is the point of a work WA group?

I'm on the fence, as I can see both sides, but ultimately, due to COL, I think YABU. It would be a shame (and rather miserable reading) if only 5 people (vs 30) wrote a message in the card due to a "pay per signature" approach.

I'm pleased that the company I work for don't do collections... instead, a Moonpig link is sent around for everyone to write a message for a card and a present is bought via company card/expenses (for big birthdays and special occasions like weddings, houses and babies). I realise that we're lucky/perhaps unusual, but it does save a lot of faff, plus saves those who can't afford to contribute from embarrassment.

I gave when I could. I can’t at the moment because I have 2 children in childcare. When I say every penny is accounted for, I mean every penny. That doesn’t mean I don’t care about or appreciate my colleagues but we can barely afford to buy our own children presents (I budget £30 for their birthdays so I’m not extravagant). So putting £5 in is beyond us at this moment in time.

I've always enjoyed leaving card messages far more than random candles, plants, or whatever else has been bought. Everyone knows that not everyone gives, it really isn't the issue that you seem to think.

Which one is your favourite biro? How can anyone love a biro? Have you never tried a Uni-Ball micro rollerball? You'll look back on your favourite biro in shock that you ever loved it...

Bank transfer probably putting people off. I couldn't give money as I don't have an online bank. Can you collect cash too. Re the card think what would the person want 30 people signing wishing them well or 3 or 4... I think they be upset if only 3 or 4 sign. I'd rethink how you collect money and avoid using your own bank account.

They might send it to you a bit later? Was much easier when everyone had cash and you could ask them to sign at the same time and they’d hand you the money